


The Soldier and his Widow

by fanfics_she_wrote



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Avengers: Infinity War, Black Panther (2018) Spoilers, Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Captain America: The Winter Soldier, F/M, May contain spoilers, Short Chapters, Slow Updates, Some cute, Spider-Man: Homecoming Spoilers, also because I can't find winter widow content, canon has like half a say in the matter, contains scenes from and makes mention to:, grab tissues if you read while endgame is still fresh, im writing this because endgame hurt me, probably does contain spoilers, some domestic avengers moments, some sad, some very sad, started before I saw endgame so screw canon, winterwidow - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-08
Updated: 2019-05-22
Packaged: 2020-02-28 12:40:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 20
Words: 43,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18756616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fanfics_she_wrote/pseuds/fanfics_she_wrote
Summary: "Most of the intelligence community doesn't believe he exists. The ones that do call him the Winter Soldier."I call him James.





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky Barnes wonders who the woman on the bridge was

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Contains scenes from CA:TWS, with some variance

**_~~ 1991 ~~_ **

"Ready for battle, Soldier?"

"Who are you?"

"I'm the ballerina that's going to join the Winter Soldiers."

"What is your name?"

"Natalia Alianovna Romanova. Call me Black Widow."

"And you think you have what it takes to be a Winter Soldier, little dancer?"

"Let's test it. If I don't make the cut, you will never hear from the Black Widow ever again. If I do, I want photographic evidence that I, a little dancer, overpowered the great Winter Soldier."

"That can be arranged. Train well, Widow, and I will see you on the training grounds within a week."

**_~~ 2014 ~~_ **

"Nat!"

Natasha shook her head. "Hm?"

Steve offered her a smile. "You looked a little spaced out for a moment. I called you about five times. Something on your mind?"

Natasha shook her head. "Just thinking."

"About? I can be a good listener."

"I know, Steve. When I first joined Shield, I thought I was going straight. But I guess I just traded in the KGB for Hydra. I thought I knew whose lies I was telling, but . . . I guess I can't tell the difference anymore."

"Something else, Nat."

Natasha raised her eyebrows. "You're good, Captain, I'll give you that."

"Fury?"

"Distantly," Natasha said honestly. "His killer, the Winter Soldier," she clarified.

"Any particular reason?"

"He's a man with a mask who has a killstreak higher than my own, Steve. Can't a girl be curious?"

"Or threatened," Steve joked, hoping to lighten the mood. It worked; Natasha gave Steve a small smile.

_**~~ 1995 ~~** _

"Soldier, the Black Widow will join you on this mission."

The Winter Soldier raised his gaze to his superior. "As far as I am aware, she is frozen. It will take time to bring her out. Time that I do not have."

"Very well. You will carry out the assassination with the assistance of--"

"I can carry out the assassination solo."

"Hmm. When you return, you will be wiped before going under. Can't have you developing a personality."

Natalia crept through the ventilation until she reached the room where she had been, for lack of a better term, defrosting. That was twice the Winter Soldier had lied through his teeth to keep her from a mission.

Why?

_**~~ 2014 ~~** _

Steve stepped to the side and let Natasha kick Jasper Sitwell off the building. She spoke over the man's fading screams. "Oh, wait. What about that girl from accounting, Laura . . .?"

"Lillian," Steve said, "lip piercing, right?"

"Yeah, she's cute."

"Yeah, I'm not ready for that."

With a rush of wind, Sam Wilson returned Sitwell to the building roof. Natasha cast the metal Falcon wings a brief glance. The things she'd be able to accomplish with those. . .

She walked with Steve towards the man, who held up his hands in fear.

"Zola's algorithm is a program . . . for choosing Insight's targets!"

"What targets?" Steve demanded.

"You! A TV anchor in Cairo, the Undersecretary of Defense, a high school valedictorian in Iowa city. Bruce Banner, Stephen Strange, anyone who's a threat to Hydra! Now, or in the future."

"The _future_? How could it know?"

Sitwell laughed. "How could it not? The 21st century is a digital book. Zola taught Hydra how to read it." Steve and Natasha stared at him, both equally confused. "Your bank records, medical histories, voting patterns, e-mails, phone calls, your damn SAT scores. Zola's algorithm evaluates people's past to predict their future."

"And what then?"

"Oh, my God. Pierce is gonna kill me."

"What then?!" Steve repeated, his voice rising in volume.

"Then the Insight Helicarriers scratch people off the list. A few million at a time"

* * *

"Hydra doesn't like leaks," Sitwell informed them as Sam drove to Triskelion.

"So why don't you try sticking a cork in it," Sam suggested.

"Insight's launching in sixteen hours," Natasha said, "we're cutting it a little bit close here."

"I know," Steve said, "we'll use him to bypass the DNA scans and access the Helicarriers directly."

"What?!" Sitwell cried, upon realising that Steve was talking about him, "are you crazy? That is a terrible, terrible idea."

He didn't get to say why, because something landed heavily on the car, pulling Sitwell out through the window and throwing him into oncoming traffic. Bullets riddled the car. Jumping into the front, Natasha managed to move both Sam and Steve out of the way of fatal shots.

Steve pulled the handbrake up, tossing their attacker down into the street.

 _Winter Soldier_ , Natasha's foggy memory supplied, staring at the metal arm that dug into the tar. Another car rammed into theirs from the back, and before any of them could recover, the Winter Soldier jumped back onto their car and pulled the wheel right through the windscreen.

"Shit!" Sam cried.

Natasha fired at the Winter Soldier, but he jumped onto the vehicle behind them. Steve grabbed hold of the door as their car was pulled off the road. "Hang on!"

He broke the door open, holding on to Sam and Natasha, and they slid along the streets on the door.

The three scattered as Hydra agents joined the Winter Soldier and opened fire. With him firing at her, Natasha fired back at the Winter Soldier, managing to catch his goggles. Then she took off.

He addressed the Hydra agents in Russian. "She's mine. Find him."

When her voice sounded from behind a car, the Winter Soldier rolled a small bomb under it. As the car and cell phone exploded, Natasha jumped onto the Winter Soldier's back and tried to take him out. He threw her off with ease. She sprinted, glancing back once with a smirk on her face.

Something about the attack and chase gave her a familiar thrill that she couldn't quite put her finger on. She yelled for civilians to get out of the way, focusing instead on the present than her fogged up memory.

A bullet lodged in her shoulder, Natasha lost her footing and tumbled to the ground. She looked around her, eventually finding the Winter Soldier come up in front of her. He raised his gun to her head.

Natasha knew those eyes from somewhere. She frowned. Why did her memory always cloud up whenever the Winter Soldier was involved? What was it about him that affected her so badly?

He hesitated for a fraction of a second, but it was enough time for Steve to jump in and attack him.

 _James_ , something told Natasha, _his name is James._

Steve and the Winter Soldier battled it out, both equally as strong as the other, but somewhere along the battle, the Winter Soldier's mask flew off. He turned back to Steve.

"Bucky?" Steve asked in a small voice, nearly dropping his shield out of his hand.

"Who the hell is Bucky?" the Winter Soldier stated, raising his gun to aim at Steve. As he did, Sam swooped in and kicked him aside. He took aim again, but Natasha used the grenade launcher he had dropped earlier on to fire at him. The Winter Soldier vanished in the smoke, and the trio was surrounded by Hydra agents, led by Rumlow.

"Drop the shield, Cap! On your knees! Get on your knees! Now! Get down! Get down!"

Steve held his hands up.

"Get on your knees! Down!" Rumlow kicked Steve's leg and the man kneeled, still stunned by the discovery of who the Winter Soldier was. "Don't move."

Rumlow looked at the helicopter that circled them, then at Rollins, who held Steve at gunpoint. "Put the gun down. Not here," he warned, "not here!"

The Hydra agents took the trio into custody.

"It was him," Steve said a few minutes later, "he looked right at me like he didn't even know me."

"How's that even possible?" Sam asked, "it was like seventy years ago."

"Zola. Bucky's whole unit was captured in '43, Zola experimented on him. Whatever he did helped Bucky survive the fall. They must have found him and . . ."

Natasha pulled herself out off her own web of thoughts. "None of that's your fault, Steve."

"Even when I had nothing, I had Bucky."

Sam glanced at Natasha, noticing how much she bled. "We need to get a doctor here," he told the guards, "we don't put pressure on that wound she's gonna bleed out here in the truck."

One of the guards whipped out an electric rod -- and then neutralised the other. "That thing was squeezing my brain," Maria Hill complained as she pulled the helmet off. Sam stared at her in confusion. Maria glanced at him. "Who's this guy?" she asked Steve.

**_~~ 1996 ~~_ **

"What's your name?"

"I do not have one, Widow."

"Come on, everyone has a name."

"Natalia. I do not have one."

Natalia pouted. "Yes, you do. And I found it. I just wanted to know if you'd tell me, _James_."

He shook his head. "I don't have a name."

"You do. I found your file in Hydra's records. You were Sergeant Barnes in the war, an American soldier. Now you are the last surviving Winter Soldier."

He raised an eyebrow at her. "You don't consider _yourself_ a Winter Soldier?"

"I was only given enough of the serum to stabilise and preserve my body during freezing. I'm no Winter Soldier, I'm the Black Widow."

"So the little dancer overpowered the Winter Soldier with nothing but her own skills."

Natalia beamed. "Yes."

"Impressive."

"James, why is it that you remember very little about our time together each time we are woken?"

"Each time I am put under, I'm wiped. You aren't."

"Why?"

"I am a Soldier. You, the Widow. Hydra does not own you the way they own me."

"But they do own me," Natalia said, shifting closer, "you do, anyway."

"Who said I'm Hydra?" he teased, his metal arm circling her small waist.

"You could crush me with _just_ that arm."

"I'm going to forget this in a few days, you know."

Natalia kissed his forehead. "I'll have to remind you next time, then."

He tightened his hold on her ever so slightly. With his right hand, he pushed her red hair out of her face. "I look forward to it, Widow."

**_~~ 2014 ~~_ **

"GSW," Maria told a doctor, gesturing to Natasha, "she's lost at least a pint."

"Maybe two," Sam said.

"Let me take her."

"She'll want to see him first," Maris said.

She guided them through the facility to Fury, who was alive and laying in bed. Steve and Natasha's jaws almost dropped.

"About damn time," Fury said.

As the doctor tended to Natasha's wound, Fury spoke. "Lacerated spinal column, cracked sternum, shattered collarbone, perforated liver, one hell of a headache."

"Don't forget your collapsed lung," the doctor said.

Fury nodded. "Oh, let's not forget that. Otherwise, I'm good.

"They cut you open," Natasha said, "your heart stopped."

"Tetrodotoxin B. Slows the pulse to one beat a minute. Banner developed it for stress. Didn't work so great for him, but we found a use for it."

"Why all the secrecy?" Steve asked, "why not just tell us?"

"Any attempt on the director's life had to look successful," Maria explained.

"Can't kill you if you're already dead," Fury said with a shrug, "besides, I wasn't sure who to trust."

* * *

"Mission report," Alexander Pierce said as he walked into the bank vault, followed by Rumlow and a few other Hydra agents.

The Winter Soldier did not respond.

"Mission report, _now_." Pierce waited for a response that never came before he moved closer and struck the soldier's cheek.

"The man on the bridge . . . who was he?"

"You met him earlier this week on another assignment," Pierce lied.

"And the woman?"

"The _woman_?"

"I knew them."

" _Romanoff_?" Pierce asked, his face contorted in confusion. He glanced back at Rumlow, who shrugged.

"Romanoff," he murmured to himself, "who was she?"

"You saw them both on your previous assignment," Pierce said.

"I _know_ her."

Pierce pulled a chair over and sat down in front of the soldier. "Your work has been a gift to mankind. You shaped the century, and I need you to do it one more time. Society is at a tipping point between order and chaos. Tomorrow morning we're gonna give it a push. But, if you don't do your part, I can't do mine, and Hydra can't give the world the freedom it deserves."

"But I knew them."

Ignoring the insistent tone he was presented with, pierce turned to the nearest scientist. "Prep him."

"He's been out of cryo-freeze too long."

"Then wipe him and start over."

Pierce left the bank vault as the process began, ignoring the screams that echoed.

* * *

Natasha shuddered, for some reason.

"You all right?" Sam asked.

"Blood loss," Natasha lied, "it does that."

"Right," Sam said, not believing a word.

"This man," Fury said, looking at a photo of Pierce, "declined the Nobel Peace Prize. He said, 'peace wasn't an achievement, it was a responsibility.' See, it's stuff like this that gives me trust issues."

"We have to stop the launch," Natasha said.

"I don't think the Council's accepting my calls anymore," Fury said, opening a case containing three chips.

"What's that?" Sam asked.

Maria explained it. "Once the Helicarriers reach three thousand feet, they'll triangulate with Insight satellites becoming fully weaponized."

"We need to breach those carriers and replace their targeting blades with our own," Fury said.

"One or two won't cut it," Maria said, "we need to link _all three_ carriers for this to work, because if even one of those ships remains operational a whole lot of people are gonna die."

"We have to assume everyone aboard those carriers is Hydra. We need to get past them, insert the server blades, and maybe, just maybe, we can salvage what's left . . ."

"We're not salvaging anything," Steve told Fury, "we're not just taking down the carriers, Nick, we're taking down _Shield_."

"Shield had nothing to do with it."

"You gave me this mission, this is how it ends. Shield's been compromised, you said so yourself. Hydra grew right under your nose and nobody noticed."

"Why do you think we're meeting in this cave? _I noticed_."

"And how many paid the price before you did?"

"Look, I didn't know about Barnes."

 _Barnes_ , Natasha thought, _Sergeant Barnes. James._

"Even if you had, would you have told me? Or would you have compartmentalized that too? Shield, Hydra, it all goes."

"He's right," Maria said with a small shrug.

Fury looked at Natasha, who was unresponsive but wore a flat expression that gave nothing away, then at Sam.

"Don't look at me," Sam said, "I do what he does, just slower."

"Well . . . looks like you're giving the orders now, Captain."

**_~~ 1998 ~~_ **

"Widow."

"Hm?"

"How old are you?"

"I was twenty-seven when we met. I turned twenty-eight just before I completed my first mission with the Soldiers. Why?"

"You're very young."

"I'm the same age as you, Soldier."

"I was referring to the date on your birth certificate in comparison to the others, not our biological ages."

"Oh. Does it bother you?"

"No. I'm impressed."

"Soldier, you know the Red Room trains young girls as soon as we can walk."

"Still. It is impressive. You're credited with more assassinations than I am. I plan to change that."

Natalia laughed softly. "Bet on it, Soldier."

"Your weapon is mine if I succeed. Duck."

Natalia dropped and a bullet whizzed over her head, taking out the guard whose curiosity had been too great. Natalia loaded her weapon. "If in twenty years, my kill streak is higher than yours. . ." she did not want Hydra to hear her conditions.

The Winter Soldier could not help the laugh. "For someone void of anything to ground her, you sure like traditions, Widow."

"Shut up and watch my six, Soldier."

"Yes, ma'am. On your left."

Natalia fired without hesitation, and a body dropped in the distance.

"I'll have one of your weapons, Widow. One day."

"We'll see, Soldier."

_**~~ 2014 ~~** _

Natasha walked with Maria Hill. "What intel does -- or _did_ \-- Shield have on the Winter Soldier?"

"I'm not sure. Is there a specific reason?"

"I like to know my opponent's weakness in advance."

"We know very little about him. He was quite a covert assassin. You ran into him once, I believe."

Natasha nodded. "Yeah, about five years ago."

"Shield doesn't have much on him. We didn't know who he was. We did know that records state he had a partner. The two worked together in perfect harmony. The Winter Soldier alone has above twenty-four murders credited to his name. The pair in total has a count almost twice that. According to what we have, Barnes and this partner of his have been operational since the early nineties, but no one knows what happened. I assume his partner either died or was relocated, because he came alone for the three of you."

Natasha frowned at the floor as she walked. "Does Shield have anything on the partner?"

Maria raised her eyebrows.

"I don't want a surprise attack from this mystery partner."

"Right. No, we don't. Barnes was covert, but his partner was even more so. No one even knows his name."

Natasha nodded. "Could it be someone kept in suspended animation just like him over all that time?"

"Could be. Maybe there was another like him in the forties. Like I said, not much is available to read from."

"Right. Thanks, Hill."

"Anytime, Romanoff."

Natasha nodded and turned to leave.

"Natasha."

She turned around.

"Be careful."

She didn't know what Maria was referring to, but she nodded and smiled. "Always."

_**~~ 1999 ~~** _

"Soldier," Natalia greeted.

"You can call me by my name, Nat. There isn't anyone else on the floor."

Natalia scrunched up her nose. "Names are for normal people. We're not normal people."

"No, we aren't."

"Calling you James just seems so . . . wrong. It _is_ your name, but. . ."

"It's not me."

Natalia smiled and crossed the training room. "True. You are my Soldier."

"Does that make you my Widow?" James asked, giving her a grin as he set his hand on her waist. Natalia could feel the warmth from his hand over her clothing.

"That would be so terribly awkward."

"True. But you are. You are my vicious and venomous Black Widow." He glanced down at her necklace rather than her face. "And I will not remember it."

Natalia put her hand on his cheek, lifting his head. He looked at her. "And I will remind you every time. Haven't I done a good job all these years?"

"And what happens when you forget, Natalia? What then?"

"It's funny how you think I'll be able to forget you, James."

"What if you're wiped? You can't control what you remember and what you don't. You'll forget everything. Everyone. Whoever you love and trust won't mean a thing to you. You'll be nothing more than the Black Widow. You won't be Natalia. Trust me."

She scoffed. "As if. I'll always remember you, just as you'll always remember me. I'll just need something to jog my memory. You can be Hydra's Winter Soldier all they want, but when it's just the two of us, you're _my_ Soldier, _my James_ , and nothing could ever truly make me forget that forever. I know because I can be Hydra's Black Widow for as long as they want, but when we're alone, I'm your Widow, your Natalia."

"You remind me that I have a name, a life," James said, moving her bangs from her face, "you remind me that I'm a person, just like everyone else. You remind me that I'm not just Hydra's weapon."

Natalia wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head against him. "You remind me that I'm not just a stone-hearted killer, that I can love. You remind me to feel."

"Why do we hide in here, Widow? Why don't we run away? Hide somewhere else?"

"Because we're dangerous, Soldier. We're volatile, unpredictable. We need to be watched, to make sure we don't step out of line. We're not safe. We're a danger to ourselves and others."

"One day we'll leave Hydra in the dirt," James promised, kissing the top of her head, "one day we won't be too dangerous for the world."

"When, Soldier? I'm tired of having to wake you up each time. It drains me. It hurts me. To watch you wake up a heartless weapon that I must slowly coax back into being James. It would have been easier if I didn't love you."

"It would. The Red Room failed to teach you not to love. You can run away, Widow, but it will catch up to you. All that aside, you get a thrill out of this forbidden romance."

"You know me so well, Soldier."

"Did you ever doubt me, Widow?"

_**~~ 2014 ~~** _

Natasha left the folder with Steve and headed to the Smithsonian. She had found out that the Winter Soldier was a man called Bucky Barnes that Steve had known from a young age. She knew that no one had much information about Barnes, and she wasn't about to ask Steve to recount his best moments with Bucky, so her next best shot was the exhibit.

Sneaking in after dark, Natasha was surprised to find someone already standing before the exhibit. On impulse, she pulled out her gun and took aim. One shot and she would have killed him. He was dressed casually, with a baseball cap on his head, but his posture intrigued Natasha.

It wasn't calm nor relaxed. He stood stiff and in perfect posture . . . quite like a soldier.

A soldier!

"Soldier," she said, her voice ringing clear in the empty museum.

Bucky turned around to face Natasha.

 _Romanoff_ , the name bounced in his head. Pierce had said it.

"Widow," Bucky replied, pulling the name from somewhere in his memory.

Neither knew why the interaction felt vaguely familiar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ya'll. . .look what watching endgame did to me
> 
> so the reason I got into fanfiction was because I couldn't find a Dramione fanfiction that suited me, so I wrote my own. About a month (and a half maybe) ago, I had the sudden desire to get my hands on WinterWidow content and I just could not find any. So I started my own. I cannot guarantee the quality of the content, but I did work pretty hard on it so it won't be so bad . . . I hope
> 
> It starts off pretty close to canon but changes a lot soon enough. The first two chapters contain a helluva lot of flashbacks, but they also die down to make room for the actual story.
> 
> Anywho, enjoy and let me know what you think.
> 
> P.S. links to any good WinterWidow content will be highly appreciated.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clint makes a different call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EDIT: It has come to my attention that I have made a mistake. There is only a minor edit to this chapter, regarding Clint's kids. Further explained in the notes after (to spare rereading to find the edit)
> 
> makes mention to Avengers:AoU

**_~~ 2008 ~~_ **

In the year 2002, Hydra caught wind of the relationship the Winter Soldier and Black Widow had built. Instead of losing two of their greatest weapons by usual punishments, Hydra decided to wipe and freeze them both. James had simply subjected himself to it once again, unaware that Natalia fought the scientists across the facility to avoid the same fate.

"Black Widow."

Slowly, she opened her eyes.

"Black Widow, you have one hour to rest. I will return to brief you in your mission."

She stared at the doctor as he left. Once the door was closed and locked, she sat up. Something crackled, the sound seeming to come from her shoe. She looked around the room. Finding no cameras or windows, she pulled her shoe off and felt around for whatever made the noise.

She pulled out a crumpled note that contained just one sentence.

_Nat, leave Hydra in the dust before they come back._

The handwriting wasn't hers, but she trusted it. Wasting no time, she raided the room for any weapons of any kind, coming up empty. Huffing in annoyance, she pried the vent cover open and crawled into it, pulling the grate back into place behind her. She crawled through, not really sure which way was out.

"Is he awake?"

It was the same doctor that had been with her. He and someone else hovered over a man she could not quite see through the grate.

"Barely. Does she remember?"

"No. Does he?"

"Of course not. The Winter Soldier and Black Widow are our greatest weapons and we will use them for centuries to come. They cannot afford the luxuries of the ordinary."

"Indeed, Doctor. Have you briefed her on her mission as yet?"

"No. She has not gone through this before. I thought it best to give her mind some time to adjust. She remembers nothing about what she's done for us since we brought her in. Prior to her work with the Winter Soldier is her business. She needs those memories to be the Black Widow." There was a pause. "We will brief him as soon as he wakes. This will be their first mission alone since they began working as one."

The second man hummed. "Who is her target?"

"An expert Shield marksman that is getting dangerously close to all of Hydra's secrets. We are sending the Winter Soldier to take out one of Hydra's enemy bases in Germany."

"Will they succeed solo?"

"They will have to."

She scrambled through the vents as silently as she could, hoping to get as far from Hydra as possible. She stopped when she noticed she was above a weapons room. She smiled.

Twenty minutes later, she tumbled out of the vents and landed in fresh snow. Where was she? Could she even make it far enough before Hydra caught up with her?

She turned heel and sprinted, forgetting more about Hydra the further she got from it.

It was two months and several countries later when she ran into trouble. She lay on the rooftop, hidden by the night, and scanned the crowds through the lens of her sniper. She didn't plan on shooting anyone, but she had no binoculars, or night vision. The sniper would have to do. She needed money and it would be safer to simply pickpocket the right victim instead of causing a riot by shooting someone down.

She sensed the arrow seconds before it left the bow and she rolled out of the way, knocking her head on the ledge. She stood up as another fired from its hidden spot. Blindly, she fired the sniper.

Someone hissed.

She swayed on her feet. Dropping the sniper, she pulled out her handgun and slowly made her way towards the sound. She turned the corner, and a drawn arrow pressed against her stomach.

"Who are you?" she demanded, taking aim at the man on the ground.

"Clint. I work for Shield."

"Nat. Give me one reason why I shouldn't kill you."

He put the bow down. "Because I'm not taking you out like I was asked, target."

"How do I know I can trust you?"

"You don't. But you need help. Food, a home, clothes," he added the last bit, taking note of a rip in her suit. "Shield can help you."

"You called me your target. How do I know this isn't a scheme to make me come quietly?"

"You _shot_ me, Nat. In the dark, blindly. You took a guess and you hit me. There is no way in hell you would fall for a scheme. You're as skilled as they come, Black Widow."

She moved closer, jerking the gun at him. "How did you know that?"

"You said it yourself, you're my target. I know your codename -- and your real name."

She lowered the gun ever so slightly. "My name?"

He stood up with great difficulty, clutching the wound in his leg. "You're Black Widow. You were born in 1980, in Russia. You were trained in the Red Room facility that trains young girls to be master assassins. Your name is Natasha Romanoff. Do you want me to even the playing field?"

Natasha's gun was pointing at the floor; neither pointed it out. "Yes."

"I'm Hawkeye. I was born in 1982, here in Iowa. I'm a master archer and marksman, and a Shield special agent. My name is Clint Barton."

Natasha holstered her weapon. "I'll come with you. But if anything goes wrong, I'll kill you."

Clint tapped his earpiece to make sure it was working. Natasha frowned as she glimpsed the device. It didn't _look_ like an earpiece. "Tell Fury I changed my mind."

Then he pulled the device out and tossed it away. "Can you walk straight?"

She nodded. "I can help you walk. Where are we going?"

"Hold on one second."

Natasha watched as he reached into a pocket and pulled out something that he then shoved in his ear. He tapped it a few times, then did the same to something in his other ear.

"You're deaf," Natasha murmured, amazed.

"Yes," Clint said.

"I can help you walk," Natasha repeated.

Clint studied her. "Stronger than you look?"

"Of course," she said, taking his arm and hanging it over her shoulder. She held his wrist firmly, and wrapped her other arm around him. "Where are we going?"

"I'm taking you to my house. You'll be safe there until I can take you to Shield."

"Won't they come looking for you?"

"They'll come looking for the tracker," Clint said, gesturing to the earpiece that had flown off the edge of the building.

* * *

Natasha sat stiffly in the chair while Laura, Clint's wife, furiously signed at him in the kitchen. She knew that Laura didn't want her in their home, after all, Natasha was an assassin. Who would bring a killer into their home?

Clint, apparently.

Natasha tried to focus on something else, but her gaze always drifted back to the couple. At least Laura had decency enough to keep their conversation as quiet as she could go -- which happened to be ASL.

Laura argued that Natasha had shot him. Clint pointed out that Shield could use someone who could fire that accurately when blinded.

Natasha didn't know what to feel. She understood Laura, she really did. She wondered if she should just sneak out and leave this country too. She'd always wanted to visit Germany. She didn't know why.

"Stay here," Laura eventually said, leaving the kitchen.

Natasha sat a little straighter when Laura pulled out a chair on the other side of the table. "How do I know I can trust you not to harm my family while we sleep?"

"I have nothing to gain from hurting anyone in this house. Your husband chose to help me instead of kill me. I owe him my life. Killing him would be . . . I wouldn't."

Laura stared at Natasha.

"I think -- I think he was my target too. I never stayed to find out. Someone told me to run, so I did. All I heard in passing was that my target was an expert Shield marksman. If I really planned to, I would have killed him on that roof."

"Fine," Laura said, seemingly satisfied. "You can sleep in the guest room."

"I can treat his wound. I know how to. I've done it many times before."

Laura hesitated. "Teach me how to do it properly, then."

Natasha offered Laura a smile. "Thank you."

Two hours later, Natasha awoke to a soft cry. She wondered if Laura or Clint had heard it, but when nothing else sounded, she dismissed it and turned over. Seconds after she had closed her eyes, the cry sounded again. It was soft, gentle. A child's cry.

She listened for any other sounds, and concluded that both Laura and Clint were still fast asleep. Soundlessly, she left the guest bedroom and wandered down the hall. Grunts of discomfort reached her as she passed by a door that had been left ajar. She wondered if she was intruding, but she was sure the whimpering child would soon begin crying.

More curious than anything else, Natasha pushed the door open and walked in. On one side, a little girl lay asleep, her name painted above. Nicole. The baby boy whimpered, grabbing Natasha's attention. She walked over to the crib on the other side of the room. The child's face was twisted in some kind of pain. He seemed to recognise his mother in the clothes Natasha had been given to sleep in.

"Callum," Natasha read from the colourful alphabets on the wall above the crib.

The child recognised his name and stared up at Natasha with wide eyes.

Laura stopped in the doorway. She had prepared to ask Natasha just what the hell she thought she was doing, but something about the way Natasha stood away from the crib intrigued Laura.

"What's it like," Natasha murmured, under the impression that she would go unheard, "to be so innocent? So pure? What's it like to be so carefree? Callum."

She watched the baby boy laugh at her, delight lighting his face up.

Laura was lucky to have him. The Red Room had ripped this away from Natasha.

Slowly, Laura walked in.

"I'm sorry," Natasha said, not looking away from Callum, "I didn't mean to overstep. He cried out."

"He does that sometimes," Laura said as she came to stand beside Natasha, "usually means he's hungry or he can't sleep."

"How do you know?"

Laura shrugged. "A mother's instinct, I suppose. It's not something you understand. It's just something that you develop. You look afraid."

"Curious," Natasha corrected, tilting her head. Callum copied her. "I've never been so close to a child before."

"What do you mean?"

"In the Red Room, we're shut off from the outside world. When I ran two months ago, I didn't mingle with people."

Laura reached into the crib and picked Callum up. The boy gave his mother a smile before turning to look at Natasha.

"He's curious, too," she said with a smile. "We don't get many visitors. We live off the grid because of Clint's job. To the rest of the world, we don't exist."

Natasha smiled, understanding Laura's hidden meaning. She knew was it was like to be cut off from the world. Of course, not what the Red Room was like. But Natasha appreciated it.

Callum reached out for Natasha. The woman looked to Laura.

"He wants you to carry him," Laura explained, "if he likes you, he'll stay. If not, he'll cry."

Natasha stared at Callum with eyes as wide as his own. "What if I drop him?"

"I wouldn't pass him to you if I thought you would. You can talk to Nicole tomorrow when she wakes up. She's a shy one, so don't get your hopes up."

Callum stared at Natasha for a few seconds as she held him before slowly putting his head down on her shoulder.

"He's going to sleep," Laura whispered, amazed, "he must really like you."

Natasha couldn't help the smile that stretched her lips. She had never felt more proud.

_**~~ 2015 ~~** _

One thing that always plagued Natasha was that she had let Barnes leave the Smithsonian that night without going after him. But there were other things taking precedence now.

"Nat."

"Hm?"

Laura offered the redhead a smile as she walked over. "What's on your mind?"

"Nothing. I'm fine."

"You're going to cut into your own hand, balling up your fists so tight."

Noticing it, Natasha relaxed her hand, glancing at the semi-circles her nails left in her palm.

"When Clint first brought you home, when you spent the next four months with us, I noticed that you did it a lot. _Every time_ when you were spaced out. I never asked because I figured you needed your privacy."

"I'm fine, Laura."

"Nat, don't play with me. Nathaniel isn't going to be my third child, he's my fourth."

Natasha frowned up at Laura. "You lost me."

"I cared for you in those four months -- okay, three and a half, I didn't know if I could really approach you in the beginning -- but that's not the point. I cared a hell of a lot for you while you stayed with me, and then I sent you to Shield. I cared for you the way I cared for Nicole, the way I cared for Callum, and the way I will for Nathaniel. I treated you like a fragile newborn that I had to raise. I learnt all your habits, what makes you tick, when you're just spaced and when something is weighing you down. I have done everything for you that I've done for my children."

"Ironically enough, I'm pretty sure I'm older than you."

Laura knocked the back of Natasha's head, not violently. "Nat, I'm being serious."

"It's nothing," Natasha insisted.

Laura sighed. "Great. One of my children has entered her teenage years."

"Laura!"

"Just . . . look after yourself, Nat."

Natasha nodded. Once Laura left, Natasha made her way to the bathroom. She stared at her reflection. Two necklaces hung from her neck, one short and sitting just below her collarbone, and the other long enough to hide under her clothes. She pulled the longer one out and stared at them both.

She remembered receiving the shorter one. A dainty little golden arrow. Clint had given it to her after one whole year of partnering up at Shield. Laura had laughed at it. Clint had laughed too, until Natasha presented Clint with her small red widow symbol hanging from a gold chain. Laura continued laughing, having been the one to suggest the idea to the pair. Laura had called them friendship necklaces. Neither of them had ever taken it off since, and both had bought Laura an identical one to their own.

The longer one always clouded up her memory. She never could figure out where she had received it, or from whom. Like Clint's gift, it hung on a thin gold chain, but its pendant was a circle that encased two overlapping shapes. One was the sharp hourglass, and the other was a five-pointed star. It never made sense to her. Unlike Clint's gift, the second pendant was large enough to be seen at quite a distance.

The Maximoff girl had gotten into Natasha's head, and Natasha was not happy about having more questions that she couldn't answer.

She'd seen flashes of the Red Room, of her graduation 'gift', her first kill, her training, and all were dredged up memories she had repressed. But those weren't what unhinged her.

She had seen a silhouette tie the longer necklace around her neck while she smiled at her reflection, her hand hovering over the pendant. She saw herself in the midst of a fight, back to back against someone she knew wasn't Clint. She saw herself laugh as she stared out from behind the leaves of trees as someone made hilariously inappropriate jokes about the death of their target in her earpiece. She saw herself scold her partner with a smile on her lips. She saw herself practice the ballet she had learned in the Red Room, but someone watched her -- and she wanted that someone to see.

Natasha shook her head, realising that she had been gripping the sink tight enough to break it -- had she had the strength of one of the other superheroes. She stared at her reflection. A single tear rolled down her cheek. She glared at it. Why did she want to cry? 

The answer that made the most sense was that it was out of frustration. Sighing, Natasha left the bathroom and dropped onto the couch in the living room.

Laura came by ten minutes later to tuck Natasha in with the woman's favourite blanket from the day she had arrived in the Barton household.

_**~~ 1996 ~~** _

"Widow."

"Soldier," Natalia greeted with a smile, "what brings you to my humble quarters?"

He hesitated.

"James?"

Taking a deep breath, he closed the door and walked towards her. "It has been about five years since we began working together. I had something made for you before we returned from the mission."

"James, it's _barely_ been so long for us."

He shrugged. "The calendar says five years, Natalia. Besides, do you want the gift or not?"

"Of course, I do, James," she said, taking the box from him. "When did you even have time to get away?"

"When you turned your head the other way."

Throwing him an amused grin, Natalia opened the box and lifted the gold chain out. "Oh, it's beautiful."

"It's long enough that you can hide it from Hydra under your uniform as well as most other clothes you wear. It's real gold, and this," he lifted his hand so that the pendant rested on his palm, "represents us, living in our own little bubble between freezes."

"Thank you, Soldier," Natalia whispered, "I've never gotten something so delicate in my life."

Smiling, James took the chain from her and turned her to face the mirror. He tied the necklace around her neck, while she smiled at herself, her hand hovering over the pendant as if it were too fragile for her to touch.

"I assume you like it, then, Widow?"

"Don't ask me stupid questions, Soldier," Natalia snapped, wrapping her arm around his neck. "I love it."

"Mm, I love _you_."

Natalie's entire body stilled. Sure, the feeling had been implied by them both several times before, but neither of them had ever voiced it.

"This is the part where you say it back, Widow," James murmured into her hair.

Smiling into his shoulder, Natalia murmured, "I love you."

"Don't forget me, Widow. Don't let them make you forget."

"They couldn't if they used their most powerful technology. I'll always remember, as long as you let me remind you every time."

**_~~ 2015 ~~_ **

Disaster, destruction and deaths later, Natasha looked at those she would be helping Steve train.

_I could be searching for Barnes right now._

Steve addressed their newest additions to the team. "Avengers --"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *There is no, I repeat, NO, romantic relationship between Natasha and Bruce, meaning that they never spoke about running away and leaving the Avengers, and she never kissed and pushed him off the city. She behaves like a real human being with feelings and coaxes him to help them, convincing him that they need him to help out (not really relative to the story but I felt like it needed a mention)
> 
> **Clint's kids' names were taken from a friend of mine who claims they come from the comics (except Nathaniel because that was stated in the movie) This was written before I saw Endgame and truth be told, I'm not changing it because I like the reasoning (especially Nicole)
> 
> ***In light of the sudden realization that Lila (Nicole, in this fic) in Endgame looking roughly 13-ish, I had to change the scene when Natasha holds Callum (whose mcu name is Cooper, I've been told?) As the chapter stood, Callum, the eldest, was born now in 2008. The change is that Nicole has been added as being born 4 years earlier. That's it. Told u, t'was minor.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky says things on autopilot that trigger memories  
> The little dancer overpowers the Winter Soldier

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> contains scenes from CA:CW
> 
> Look at this long ass chapter I edited just now. Appreciate it, they get real short real soon.

**_~~ 2016 ~~_ **

Natasha sat on the next bench over from the prince of Wakanda. "I'm very sorry," she said

T'Challa glanced at her. He held an ornate silver ring, toying with it. "In my culture death is not the end. It's more of a . . . stepping-off point. You reach out with both hands and Bast and Sekhmet, they lead you into the green veldt where . . . you can run forever."

"That sounds very peaceful."

"My father thought so," T'challa said. He slipped the silver ring on his finger. "I am not my father."

"T'Challa. Task force will decide who brings in Barnes."

The Wakandan prince clenched his fist. "Don't bother, Miss Romanoff. I'll kill him myself."

Natasha watched him leave, wondering how long it would take her to locate Barnes with the zero resources that she had.

Natasha's ringing phone pulled her from the ridiculous plans she tried to make. "Yeah?"

"You alright?" Steve asked.

"Yeah, thanks. I got lucky." Frowning, Natasha looked around, then stood up. "I know how much Barnes means to you. I really do. Stay home. You'll only make this worse. For all of us. Please."

"Are you saying you'll arrest me?"

"No," Natasha replied, "someone will. If you interfere. That's how it works now."

"If he's this far gone, Nat, I should be the one to bring him in."

"Why?"

"Because I'm the one least likely to die trying."

"Shit."

* * *

Natasha hadn't expected to see Steve Rogers get arrested so soon. Sam seemed more than annoyed at having is suit taken away from him.

Natasha was preoccupied with where Barnes had gone. Someone mentioned that he was being evaluated. She watched from a screen.

For the first time, Natasha got a proper look at the Winter Soldier. When she had seen him at the Smithsonian, it had been dark and he had been hiding under a cap. The man on the screen wasn't hiding. He looked familiar, and not from the Bucky Barnes exhibit in the museum.

She frowned at the feed, pulling her necklace out from under her clothes and fiddling with it. There was no way she could've known Barnes. She was born in 1980. Hydra captured him in 1945. There was no way.

The man sent to evaluate Barnes kept calling him James, until he eventually interrupted him. "My name is Bucky."

"Tell me, Bucky. You've seen a great deal, haven't you?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

Natasha tugged at the necklace lightly.

"You fear that . . . if you open your mouth, the horrors might never stop. Don't worry. We only have to talk about one."

Natasha caught a glimpse of Bucky's face as he turned away from his evaluator. She nearly pulled the chain off her neck. "Soldier."

And then the power went out.

* * *

Natasha jumped on his back and tried to violently bring James out of the Winter Soldier. He flipped her over, onto the table, his hands around her throat.

"You could at least recognise me, Soldier."

She thought she saw a flicker of recognition, but it was gone just as quickly as it had come.

T'challa appeared, seemingly from thin air, to kick Bucky off Natasha, allowing her to breath -- and curse.

After fighting each one of his opponents, Bucky made his way to a helicopter on the roof. Natasha watched from the ground as the tail fell into the river first, then the rest of the helicopter, with both Bucky and Steve. She waited a few more seconds, debating whether she should sprint and dive to save either or both, when Steve broke the surface of the water, holding Bucky afloat.

Natasha followed Steve and Sam as they took off with Bucky.

To hell with the Accords.

_**~~ 2002 ~~** _

"What will you do if I forget you?"

"James will die."

Natalia sighed as they walked. "Then I guess I'll just never forget. Do you know, most people visit here for a romantic evening."

"Well, killing things is what you're good at, and I admire you at work. Romantic enough."

"Soldier, it's _morning_."

James shrugged. "So? It's dark."

Natalia laughed. "You're special, Soldier. A real special kind of idiot. Great personality, though."

"I'm glad. I created this one specifically for you."

"Soldier! Behave!"

James grinned. Casually, he threaded his fingers with Natalia's. She sighed. "Must I hold your left hand? I do prefer your skin over metal. It's much warmer."

"You're Russian, Widow, you should be accustomed to the cold."

"Don't stereotype, Soldier." She stayed on his left for a few more seconds before clicking her tongue and moving to his right, where she took hold of his hand and even went to rest her head against his arm. "This is the closest we will ever come to a date."

"How sad. Target at two o'clock."

Natalia sighed before glancing in that direction while James made no movement towards their target. "Guess the date's over, then."

"Come along, Widow, I've found my vantage spot. I'll be watching you."

Natalia heaved a tired sigh. "I was just starting to enjoy it," she said, walking in the opposite direction.

Neither let go, and both jerked back after a few steps. "Oh, this isn't goodbye, Soldier. We'll still have a day before freezing."

" _You're_ holding on to me, Widow. You're acting as if this is the last time we'll work together," he teased. He glanced over her head. "Your target is escaping."

Natalia cursed and let go of James to pursue the target. James climbed through the unfinished building and settle behind his rifle, watching Natalia's back.

**_~~ 2016 ~~_ **

Natasha hid and watched Bucky slowly come to, his metal arm trapped in an industrial vice. Steve watched through a gap as a chopper flew over the warehouse. Sam watched Bucky.

"Hey, Cap!" Sam called as soon as he noticed.

"Steve," he said when the Captain came to stand in front of him.

"Which Bucky am I talking to?"

"Your mom's name was Sarah. You used to wear newspapers in your shoes."

"Can't read that in a museum," Steve said with a nod.

"Just like that, we're supposed to be cool?"

Natasha couldn't blame Sam's skepticism.

"What did I do?" Bucky asked.

"Enough."

"I knew this would happen," Bucky said, defeated, "everything Hydra put inside me is still there. All he had to do was say the goddamn words."

"Who was he?"

"I don't know."

"People are dead," Steve said, "the bombing, the setup. The doctor did all that just to get 10 minutes with you. I need you to do better than 'I don't know', Buck."

"He wanted to know about Siberia. Where I was kept. He wanted to know exactly where."

 _Siberia_ , the city bounced around in Natasha's head. She knew she'd never been there, so why did she feel like she had?

"Why would he need to know that?" Steve asked.

"Because I'm not the only Winter Soldier."

The warehouse was silent; Natasha almost stopped breathing to remain so.

"Tell your shadow to come out of the dark," Bucky said a second later, stating right at Natasha.

Sam and Steve panicked until Natasha stepped into view, watching Bucky curiously.

"What are you doing here, Nat?" Steve asked.

"Soldier," Natasha greeted, as she had in the Smithsonian.

And just like in the Smithsonian, Bucky stared back at her. "Widow."

"I know you."

"I know," Bucky said, his gaze dropping to the necklace that she hadn't yet hidden again. "Where did you get that?"

"Nat?" Steve asked, going ignored.

"I know someone special gave it to me a very long time ago. Why?"

"Looks familiar," Bucky said evasively.

Natasha picked up two of the crates she had been hiding behind and dropped them one on top of the other in front of Bucky to make a chair for herself. "Every time I run into you, something bad happens. You are ruining my life. I spend the day in ridiculous levels of confusion, and my nights are plagued by unsettling dreams featuring you."

Sam and Steve didn't know what to do besides stand back and watch. It seemed as if Natasha and Bucky had slipped into their own bubble, where Natasha was determined to pry answers from Bucky.

"Well, it's not like _you've_ been giving _me_ very pleasant thoughts either, Widow. Your face haunts me, and I don't even know why."

"I'm not sorry, Soldier."

"Although, you look a lot better with the curls. Suits you."

"I thought so too."

Sam leaned towards Steve. "What's with the Soldier and Widow name thing going on?"

"Do I look like I have _any idea_ what's going on?" Steve asked.

"It's unruly," Bucky told Natasha with a grin, "like you."

Natasha narrowed her eyes. "You have a _shit_ personality, Soldier."

"Thanks, I made this one just for you," Bucky spat sarcastically.

Natasha froze for a second. "Let him loose."

All three stared at her, in varying degrees of confusion. Natasha turned back to look at Steve. "We don't have all day, Steve."

"Uh, okay."

Nobody wanted to get on Natasha's bad side. They hadn't seen it yet, and they never wanted to.

Bucky stood up, swinging his metal arms a few times. "What do you want, Widow?"

"I get flashes, sometimes. Fighting a man with a metal arm. I always assumed I had just run into you on another mission and hit my head really hard, hard enough to forget. But that was then. Now I remember more. I want to see if I can jog my memory a little further."

Bucky frowned. "And you want me . . . to fight you? You know this didn't end well the last two times it happened. I can remember that much."

"But what about the _first_ time it happened, Soldier? The last two times, you were acting on orders, from Hydra or from that doctor, as nothing more than the Winter Soldier. Now, you're aware. You can think for yourself, make different choices . . . you can make mistakes."

"All right." Bucky glanced at Steve. Steve nodded.

"I am _not_ going in over my head!" Natasha snapped, "I'll know when to quit!"

"Fiesty Widow," Bucky chuckled, slipping into a stance in front of Natasha. She threw him a glare. "Annoying Soldier."

She didn't wait for Bucky to finish laughing at her before she attacked.

At one point, Sam actually stepped back and winced, shutting his eyes for a second. Steve wondered _when_ he was supposed to pry them apart. They were almost just a blur, neither holding back in the slightest. He would most definitely take a few hits if he had to intervene. Something flew through the air, landing on the ground and sliding until it hit Steve's shoe. He bent down for it, noticing that it was a locket that had popped open.

"Natasha's?" Sam asked as Steve picked the golden chain up.

"I think so."

"Broken?"

"Surprisingly not."

Steve pulled out the tightly folded paper from inside and they both read the words on it.

_Photographic_ _evidence that a_ _little_ _dancer overpowered the great Winter Soldier -- 1991_

Frowning, Steve turned the photo over.

"Uhh, Cap?" Sam tapped Steve on the arm, staring at Natasha and Bucky.

Steve looked up at them, then held the photo up. Aside from attire and background, the pair looked identical to the pair in the photo. Steve dumped the necklace and photo in Sam's hand before rushing over to pry Natasha off Bucky before she broke his metal arm off, or the bone in his right.

"Nat, let _go_! You won!"

Natasha let go and Steve lifted her with ease. He put her down on the side and offered Bucky a hand up.

Of course, they ignored Steve after that.

"You're good, Widow, but I don't see how that helped you at all."

"It helped me a lot," Natasha said softly, "I just wish it had helped you too."

Steve returned with the photo from Sam and shoved it between the two. "Explain. Now."

Bucky stared at it.

"If I don't make the cut, you will never hear from the Black Widow ever again," Natasha murmured, staring at the photo, "if I do, I want photographic evidence that I, a little dancer, overpowered the great Winter Soldier."

"Widow?"

"Guys? Explain . . . Please?" Steve tried again, receiving no response.

"In 1991, Hydra got their hands on a serum to physically enhance the rest of the Winter Soldiers, hopefully, to bring them up to speed with you," Natasha said. Sam walked over to Steve and although she only spoke to Bucky, all three paid attention. "In 1991, the Winter Soldier programme was cancelled when the other soldiers revolted and turned on Hydra. You took them all down. One of the team wasn't given enough of the serum to turn into one of the Soldiers, just enough to survive repeated cryo-freeze. Your partner, from then until 2002. Over that time, you and your partner's kill streak skyrocketed. Every time Hydra put you under, they'd wipe you. Every time you woke up, your partner would remind you who you are. In 2002, Hydra wiped and froze both."

"Nat, who --"

Natasha cut Bucky off, her train of thought elsewhere. "In 2008, I ran away from the Red Room. I ran until I ended up in Iowa, where Clint was sent to take me out. Thing is, I don't remember running from the Red Room. I remember passing their little graduation ceremony and going out, doing a little freelance work, if you will. When Clint found me in Iowa, I didn't even know my name, how old I was, or where I was from. I used to think I made up memories based on what was in my Shield file. Then you show up, and there's just something about you that seems to always hit me over the head. Then you disappeared and the feeling disappeared too. Two years ago, you show up once again, and for some reason, my brain clouds up. Last year, Wanda got in my head. I expected all those Red Room nightmares but there was something else. There was always something else. That's how I know that necklace was a gift. I had a partner before Clint. I just didn't know who he was."

Steve and Sam glanced between Natasha and Bucky.

"What the fuck?" Steve eventually said.

"Language," Sam blurted, apologising softly to Steve a second later.

Natasha took the pendant from a stunned Sam. "I always wondered what the symbols meant."

Bucky stared at it. "You and me, in our own little bubble, away from Hydra."

Natasha shrugged. "The more time I spend around you, the more I remember. When I woke up in 2008, I know now that it was Hydra I ran from, not the Red Room."

"It's not possible," Steve eventually said. "You were born in the eighties."

"That's what my Shield file says, Steve. My Shield file also says that my name is Natasha Romanoff."

"Isn't it?"

"Natalia," Bucky murmured, "Natalia Alianovna Romanova, the little dancer that's going to join the Winter Soldiers."

Natasha nodded.

"I remember that day. You beat me before they even gave you a bit of the serum. That's why you never had to be put down like the others. You never had the full dosage."

Natasha nodded again. Then her eyes widened. "The others!"

"What about them?" Steve asked.

"Yeah, put down usually means dead," Sam said.

"No, she's right," Bucky said, "I remember the other Soldiers. They were subdued then suspended, not killed. If the serum worked even a little bit, then they're still alive. That's what he wants. . ." Slowly, Bucky came to the same realisation Natasha had. "He wants to wake the others. He's in Siberia."

"So -- apparently -- as the only person in this room who has never been touched by this serum thing, can one of you run me through this slowly?"

Bucky turned from Steve to Sam. "The Winter Soldiers were Hydra's most elite death squad, with more kills than anyone in Hydra history, and that was before the serum."

"They all turn out like you?" Sam asked.

"Worse," Natasha said, "they went rabid, and that's why Karpov shut down the Winter Soldier programme, leaving So-- _Barnes_ as the last surviving Winter Soldier."

"That doctor from the cell," Steve said, "could he control them?"

"I've never seen him before," Bucky confessed, "but those words, they're triggers. They sort of. . ."

"Factory reset," Natasha supplied, "I used it on one of the others once. It turns the Soldiers into obedient little dogs. Violent and merciless dogs. It takes away their free will and turns them into a machine."

"Do they work on you?" Sam asked.

Natasha shrugged. "I don't think so. I don't remember ever having them drilled into my head. Unlike the Soldiers, I don't think I ever woke up to blank spots in my memory. Well, back then, I mean."

"He said he wanted to see an empire fall," Steve recalled.

"With these guys, he could do it," Bucky said, "they speak over thirty languages, can hide in plain sight, infiltrate, assassinate, destabilize, They can take a whole country down in one night. You'd never see them coming."

"You speak thirty languages?" Sam asked Natasha.

"Twenty-three. I was born much later than the Soldiers. I never had time to learn more."

"If we call Tony. . ." Steve began.

"No," Sam said, "he won't believe us."

"Even if he did. . ."

"Who knows if the Accords would let him help."

"We're on our own," Steve sighed.

"Maybe not. I know a guy."

Natasha spoke up. "You go get your guy. Leave Tony to me."

"Weren't you going to sign the Accords?"

"Screw the Accords, Steve." She turned to leave the warehouse. "Coming, Soldier?"

"I'm a wanted man, Widow."

"I wasn't asking."

"Uhh. . ."

"You're gonna need this," Steve said, offering Bucky his jacket.

"And this," Sam added, holding out his cap.

Bucky took them both. "She's mean," he eventually said, after donning both items.

"I'm not surprised. You always did have a thing for nasty redheads."

"James!"

"Coming!" Bucky didn't waste a second more.

* * *

"Tony?"

"Ah, you just missed Mr Everett Ross."

"I saw him leave."

"Care to tell me where you've been and why you haven't signed yet? You know, I have thirty-six hours to bring in you, Rogers, Barnes and Wilson. I am desperately understaffed for two super soldiers, one bird-man and one Russian assassin. Oh, and my left arm is numb, is that normal?"

" _Three_ supersoldiers," Natasha corrected then continued before Tony could respond to it, "Just . . .  hear me out, Tony. Please."

In all the years that he'd known Natasha, Tony had _never_ heard her beg. "You have twenty minutes to justify why I shouldn't tick one item off my checklist."

Natasha shook her head. "Not here. It's a . . . sensitive issue. I followed Steve and Sam when they fled with an unconscious Barnes."

"So you know where they are?" Tony asked, standing up, suddenly alert.

"Well, I don't know where Sam and Steve are right this very second."

"Barnes?"

Natasha nodded. "But I need you to hear me out, Tony. I need you to listen carefully. It's important."

"So talk."

"I can't in here."

"I'm gonna regret this, aren't I?"

"Probably," Natasha said, leading Tony out to the parkade, "try not to attack on sight."

"Why would I atta . . . you have Barnes with you, don't you?"

Natasha didn't respond.

They entered the parkade and were immediately met with the sounds of a violent fight.

"I didn't kill your father!"

"Then why did you run?"

"Because you attacked me! In a cat-suit!"

"Oh, my God," Natasha murmured as she saw Bucky streak past, T'Challa hot on his heels.

"Well, _someone's_ taking care of Barnes," Tony said, sticking his hands in his pockets.

"Widow!"

"I'm sorry," Tony said, turning to Natasha, "did he just --"

"I said you need to hear me out. Just . . . could you extend my time by five minutes?"

"I'm only granting you that courtesy because a, you're a friend and b, this should make my shitty day a little amusing."

Natasha rolled her eyes and took off after the pair. Tony's interest grew when T'Challa's chief of security took off after Natasha. He watched them change each other around the parkade, somehow managing to not damage a single car, until Natasha finally managed to get between T'Challa and Bucky to hold the prince back. The chief of security made a move for Natasha, but she had already let go and stepped back from T'Challa.

"I didn't. . ." Short of breath, Bucky leaned against a pillar. "I didn't kill your father, but I think I know who did."

T'Challa turned to Natasha. "Miss Romanoff, you trust this man?"

"With my life," Natasha said without hesitation.

"Well, that was all very interesting," Tony said as he walked over, "but that cleared up _nothing_ whatsoever." He glanced at Natasha. "Your time starts now."

"Tony --"

"I believe him," T'Challa said, glancing at Bucky, who stood way out of reach.

"Okay, fine. But the law doesn't. So I'm going to need you to find the bomber or Barnes is going down."

"He's in Siberia," Natasha said, "and that's where we're going. We need your help. If you do, I'll. . ."

"We'll come quietly," Bucky said, "Steve, Sam, and Nat will sign the Accords."

"Soldier!"

Tony shrugged. "And you?"

"I'm a criminal."

"Fair enough. Okay, let's all sit down for tea and discuss this. Name it and I'll be there alone."

"Thank you, Tony."

T'Challa cleared his throat. "I wish to help."

Natasha glanced at Bucky before nodding. "If we don't get to Siberia in time, we're going to need all the help we can get."

* * *

"I gave this to you?" Bucky asked, reaching out for the locket as they sat in the ruins of a run-down cafe, waiting for Tony and T'Challa to arrive.

Natasha nodded. "I don't remember receiving it. When I woke up that day, there was a note. It told me to run. I never knew who wrote it, but I suppose it must've been you. If I had known, I would have come for you first. I wouldn't have run alone."

Bucky shrugged, running his thumb over the overlapping shapes. "I don't blame you. If I wrote that note, I wrote it to remind you to run. I'm satisfied that you survived at all. How close were we?"

"Close enough for gifts," Natasha teased. "I never knew it was a locket. Of course, it would've just opened up even more questions. Do you know how many kills we're credited with together in those seventeen years?"

Bucky shook his head. "A little below the Winter Soldiers' count?"

Natasha scoffed. "Over fifty, and that's not even counting the missions we've completed solo. I assume that's why Hydra kept me so long, putting up with me so long. We were thrice as efficient as the Winter Soldiers, who had been operational for years before I came into the picture. It took them twice as long to rack up a little less than that, and there were five of them."

"They don't call you the Black Widow for nothing, Natalia."

Natasha sighed. "What if we'd never met, Soldier? What if you had died that day when you fell off the train and I was never introduced to the serum? What if we lived and died when we were supposed to?"

"I don't know, Widow. But I'd rather forget and remember you a thousand times over than to have never met you at all."

"That sounds painful," Natasha mumbled, resting her head on Bucky's shoulder. Still fiddling with her necklace, Bucky wrapped his left arm around her waist loosely, tapping rhythmically on her leg.

"Pain reminds us that we're alive. You know, I think I remember giving this to you. Some anniversary of some kind. You laughed at it."

"Sound like me," Natasha said with a smile.

"It was for five years of working together. Calendrically, of course." 

"I wish I could remember everything. It would be so much easier to understand."

"You will, with time. Or I could hit you really hard on the head."

"Soldier, that _causes_ memory loss."

"I'm teasing, Widow."

"I hate you," Natasha grumbled, but nothing she did backed up her words.

"Touching as this display of affection is, you're running out of time."

Natasha sat up straight and Bucky let go of the chain. He didn't take his arm from around her, and he didn't stop tapping her leg.

"How long have you been standing there?" Natasha asked Tony.

"The body count," T'Challa said.

"Would either of you like to explain or should I detain and interrogate you after we finish up in Siberia?"

"Is there an Option C?" Bucky asked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> strap in folks, we about to see that huge-ass Steve&Bucky vs. Tony, now with added fighters.
> 
> Also, I know I tagged this as slow updates, but that's just for when I finish updating all the chapters I've already written before I went to see Endgame.
> 
> (Seeing that movie really hurt my feelings and made me angry at Marvel so like . . . I didn't want to work on this because everything made me sad)


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I make an Avengers reference  
> Bucky acts on forgotten instincts again  
> Peter Parker's choices start to give Tony anxiety (more than Natasha's already did, anyway)

"Well, isn't this just great? We have a doctor with murderous intentions and five more supervillains that could possible be woken to attack us. So, where's Spangles and his parrot?"

"Is everything a joke to you, Mr Stark?"

"Funny things, yes," Tony told T'Challa before turning again to Bucky and Natasha. "Well?"

Natasha's phone buzzed. "Getting his suit back. We need a Quinjet."

"What we need is to stage a fight. I can't just let you roll up and fly off in one of the jets. I'll lose being on Ross' good side, then everyone is well and truly screwed."

Natasha sighed.

"And since you're so happy to help the Captain out, you get to play traitor."

"Excuse me?" Both assassins asked.

Tony shrugged. "It makes perfect sense. You show up to steal a jet, I fight to keep you grounded. Someone is playing both teams and lets Steve go."

T'Challa nodded. "It does make sense. Not perfect, but sense enough. I will meet you in Siberia to avenge my father."

Natasha smiled. "I'll keep him alive long enough."

Tony stood up. "Okay, here's the plan. There isn't one. You never met up with us here. Natasha came by to speak to me and with my dashing looks and mesmerising words, I reminded her why she wanted to sign the Accords. Try not to hit me too hard and by then end of it, Natasha will be the one to let you run away in your stolen jet."

"Excuse you, Stark. She's coming _with_ us."

"Overprotcetive boyfriend you picked up, Nat."

"I'll make a plan to get on the jet," Natasha told Bucky, "but if I don't, get to Siberia without me." She offered the prince a smile. "I'll just hitch a ride with Catsuit."

"The Black Panther," T'Challa said, sounding a smidge insulted.

"Great, is everyone clear? Scat."

Natasha rolled her eyes at Tony and got up to walk with Bucky to the door.

"Steve is going to be pissed."

"You'll have to pacify him on the jet if I don't get to. I'll bring the cavalry if I can."

"I hope you can act like a good traitor, Widow."

"I'm a spy, Soldier, I've been doing it since I could talk. Want me to hit you really so you can show Steve I tried to knock you out and hand you over to Tony?"

"No, it's okay. I'm sure his highness over there left some scratches I can use."

"You just don't want me to beat you up again," Natasha teased.

Bucky laughed and surprised Natasha with a gentle kiss on her cheek before he left the cafe. She went back to the table to find Tony waiting for her. T'Challa had left sometime while she was was gone.

"So, you and Barnes. How long as that been going on?"

"Since I was recruited into the same programme in '91," Natasha blurted.

Tony chuckled. Natasha gave him a blank stare. "Oh, you're serious. Weren't you like, eleven? That's twisted, even for you."

Natasha whacked the back of Tony's head the way Laura often did to Natasha when she had a sharp tongue. "I was twenty-eight. Remember when I told you that you were dealing with three supersoldiers, not two?"

"I thought you were joking!" Tony cried, standing up, "I thought you were talking about _Wilson_!"

"In my defence, I'm not _actually_ a supersoldier. I'm just . . . really old. Besides, it just slipped out."

"So, let me get this straight, you _weren't_ born in the eighties?"

"Sixties, and to be accurate, I think it wasn't until 1995. Of course, Hydra weapons don't get the luxury of emotions, so when Hydra found out, I had my memory of Hydra wiped. Until yesterday, I didn't even remember any of it."

"The chain Barnes was playing with before we sat down. . ."

"He gave it to me, yeah."

"Wait, you've been Hydra this whole time?!"

"I have not! I was Hydra's weapon for seventeen years and then I had _no memory_!"

"I know, I'm just trying to find more amusement in my awful week and you are just a bubbling fountain of teasing material."

"I'll kill you."

"I'm going to go out on a limb and say the reunion wasn't all that great, considering you've aged since your last freezer dip. You must look like an old hag to Barnes."

"I'm going to kill you."

Tony laughed. "See? Bubbling fountain of teasing material! So, is the relationship skin to skin or skin to metal?"

Natasha gave Tony a glare that would melt Thor's hammer. "I swear, if you don't cut it out, I'll fry your suit."

Tony smile. "One more?"

" _One_."

"When you and Barnes settle down --"

"Stark!"

"-- do I get to attend the official formation of the new Soviet Union?"

Natasha left the cafe.

"Oh, come on, Nat!" Tony called, following her, "that one was funny!" 

* * *

"Holy _shit_ , it's the Black Widow!!"

"Tony. That is a child."

"Uh, I'm actually fifteen, Ms Black Widow."

"Kid, why'd you open your mouth?"

"Tony!" Natasha cried, "you brough a _kid_ to fight your battles?!"

"Uh, Ms Black Widow? I'm like, really super strong. I can totally fight with you guys. It's really amazing to finally meet you up close. Spider to spider, you're like . . . awesome."

Natasha walked up to Peter Parker and pulled his mask off. "You are a child."

"Nat," Tony said, taking the mask from her and handing it back to Peter, "he can hold his own. Besides, he's here to distract everyone else so we can get the job done."

"The job," Peter repeated, "like, as in, _kill_ Mr America -- CAPTAIN!"

Tony snorted. "No, no. Not kill, just . . . go for his legs."

"Because his shield is the size of a dinner plate, got it."

"What?" Natasha asked, confused at the statement, the accent Peter put on, and the somewhat disturbing grin that accompanied his finger guns.

"Nevemind," Tony said, "all you gotta do, kid, is show up and distract everyone _else_ so that the adults can detain the other adults. Okay?"

Natasha shook her head, folding her arms. "I don't like this, Tony. When Steve sees me, he's going to see red. It won't be pretty. If the kid gets between Steve and the Quinjet --"

"Uh, Ms Black Widow? My name's Peter."

"Would you put your mask back on?" Tony asked, "I don't need the whole of Germany knowing you're a child."

"Right, sure thing, Mr Stark."

"Tony. . ."

"Trust me, Nat. Everything will go according to plan."

* * *

"Is _this_ part of the plan?" Natasha asked.

"No, but Steve is starting to piss me off," Tony grumbled, helping her up. "Ready to play traitor?"

"It's in my DNA," Natasha called, already running towards the hangar.

Natasha was waiting for Steve and Bucky when they made it under the crumbling tower. "You just don't stop, do you?"

Steve didn't bother replying to her. Bucky shrugged from behind Steve. Natasha acknowledged it with a small nod. She was about to step aside and let them get the Quinjet, but T'Challa wasn't the only one that followed the pair. She knew that T'Challa would allow Steve and Bucky to leave, but not Peter.

"Sorry, kid."

Steve jumped as Natasha zapped Spiderman, momentarily stunning him. Noticing Peter, T'Challa jumped into action. Natasha hesitated, but fired at the Black Panther as well. "Go," she told the two men, steadily firing at Peter and T'Challa to slow them down.

"Nat --"

" _Go_ , Soldier."

Bucky hesitated for a second before Steve tapped his arm and ran for the jet. Natasha smiled at Bucky, giving him a wink. With a sigh, Bucky followed Steve. Peter tried to web up the jet, but Natasha tackled him to the ground.

"Spider to spider, stay out of it."

In his misguided yet good intentions, Peter threw Natasha off and stood up again to fire a web at the jet's engine.

"Kid, stop!" Natasha yelled, grabbing his arm and forcing it off the jet. Unfortunately, it hit T'Challa, webbing him against the rubble of the tower.

"We can't just let them get away!" Peter cried, trying to yank his arm out of her grasp.

Wrestling Peter, Natasha tapped her earpiece. "Stark, your child is ruining things."

"Let go of me!"

"Not until the jet is clear," Natasha grunted, grabbing Peter's arm and using her legs to lock him down. "Tony!"

Peter used his free arm to shoot a web at the ceiling, which he then used as leverage to pull himself out of Natasha's grasp. He stuck to the ceiling, staring down at Natasha with a quizzical expression that she couldn't see.

* * *

"What's gonna happen to the rest?" Bucky asked as Steve flew the jet.

Steve frowned at the skies before shaking his head. "Whatever it is, I'll deal with it."

"Steve, Nat--"

"I don't want to know, Buck. Whatever she was playing at, she went with Stark and tried to hand you over to him. I guess it's a little hard to shake the double-agent thing."

"You don't mean that, Steve."

"I do," Steve said, glancing back at Bucky.

"Steve, c'mon. She --"

"I _really_ don't want to know."

Despite every bone in his body telling him to argue and defend Natasha, Bucky fell silent. Natasha could show Steve where she stood when the time came. He'd known Steve since they were kids, and if there was one thing about Steve he was sure would never change, was that the man had a stubborn streak a mile wider than anyone else.

* * *

"What _the hell_ were you thinking, Parker?" Tony yelled when Natasha marched the teenager up to the billionaire, T'Challa close behind.

"He wasn't," Natasha snapped. She was angry, but not with Peter. "I told you this was a bad idea."

"The kid held his own, Natasha. If he had just listened --"

"He's fifteen! What did you expect?!"

Tony sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "We don't have time for this," he said. "Kid, you're going home. If word of this little debacle spreads _anywhere_ but those present, I will personally visit May and let her know what you've been up to."

"Mr Stark, please don't tell Aunt May, just . . . will you tell me what's going on?"

Natasha glanced at Tony, who shrugged. "We're lying to the government," Natasha said, "it's a thing I do sometimes."

"Why'd you let Captain America leave?"

"I had to. He . . . we needed to stage the fight to fool Ross. Steve didn't know we planned to let him leave. Almost no one did."

"We are wasting time."

The three of them turned to the royal in the corner of the room.

"He's right," Natasha said, "the longer we wait, the more time the doctor has -- Tony, you're beeping."

Tony activated the holographic images appearing on his wristwatch. T'Challa pushed away from the wall to look over Peter's head. "What am I looking at, Friday?"

"Priority upload from Berlin police."

"Fire up the chopper. Nat, you stay with T'Challa. Kid, I'm organising you a ride home. Find Happy and _go home_."

Of course, Peter did not go home.

Natasha sat next to T'Challa in the jet, linked to Tony's chopper. Friday projected into their Quinjet as well.

"The Task Force called for a psychiatrist as soon as Barnes was captured. The UN dispatched Dr Theo Broussard from Geneva within the hour. He was met by this man."

All three of them saw the photo of the doctor that had been interrogating Bucky.

"Did you run facial recognition yet?" Tony asked, his voice projected into the Quinjet as well.

"What do I look like?" Friday asked, sounding exasperated.

"Uh, I don't know. I've been picturing a red head."

"Stark," Natasha warned.

"You must be thinking of someone else," Friday said.

"Must be."

Friday showed them another image. "The fake doctor is actually Colonel Helmut Zemo, Sokovian Intelligence. Zemo ran Echo Skorpion, a Sokovian covert kill squad."

"What happened to the real Broussard?" T'Challa asked.

"He was found dead in a Berlin hotel room. Where police also found a wig and facial prosthesis approximating the appearance of one James Buchanan Barnes."

"Son of a bitch," Tony said, "get this to Ross."

"Yes, Boss."

"I'm going to pay Ross a quick visit," Tony told the pair in the jet, "stay hidden."

"I'm coming with you," Nat said, unbuckling her belt. "Stay in the clouds," she repeated to T'Challa before jumping off the jet.

"Ms Romanoff, are you still alive?" T'Challa asked a second later.

"Uh, a crazy assassin just dropped into my helicopter," Tony said, "how is she not dead? How are you not dead?" 

T'Challa welcomed the relief that followed Natasha's voice. "I'm magical. Pick me up again when we're leaving, T'Challa."

Quietly, Natasha followed Tony down to the cells.

Clint clapped. Loudly and sarcastically. "The Futurist, gentlemen! The Futurist is here! He sees all! He knows what's best for you, whether you like it or not."

"Cut the crap, Clint," Natasha said, rolling her eyes.

"What the hell, Romanoff?" Sam yelled, "Steve and I tr-- _Barnes_ trusted you!"

"You'll thank me later," Tony said, "but I just knocked the A out of their AV. We have a minute starting eight seconds and counting ago."

"Thank you," Natasha told him, walking up to Sam. "We had to. We couldn't let Ross know what Tony was up to. If Ross gets on our tail, Steve is helpless. He needs all the help he can get, and that means Tony and I need to stay _out_ of these cells."

Sam stared at Natasah for a second before laughing. "Barnes is a good actor," he eventually said. "They're already headed to Siberia."

"Time's up," Tony said.

Natasha stared at Sam. "For what it's worth, Wilson, I'm sorry."

"Go on. Get lost."

Natasha didn't miss the subtle smile playing on Sam's face as she left behind Tony.

"Did he say anything about Rogers?" Ross asked as Tony helped Natasha into the helicopter.

"He told us to go to hell. Guess I'll nap at your place. You can call me. I'll put you on hold, I like to watch the line blink."

Natasha snorted inside the chopper as Tony closed the door.

"Great, so you explained yourself to Wilson. What about Cap?"

Natasha shrugged. "I'll just have to hope Barnes had a stroke of luck. If not . . . I'll talk some sense into him."

"Right, so I don't know how you plan on getting to the Siberia, because I'm flying with the suit and the chopper is going to the compound."

"I called a ride," Natasha said with a smile, getting up at opening the door.

"Nat--!"

There was a soft crackle in the helicopter. "She is with me," T'Challa's voice sounded.

"Nat, you are officially certified insane."

"I just found out I might be indestructible. Don't expect me _not_ to test theories."

Tony sighed. "Give me strength," he murmured.

Seconds later, they saw the Iron Man streak across the sky. T'Challa turned the Quinjet accordingly.

Natasha scratched around until she came up with four earpieces. She passed one to T'Challa, put one in her ear, and dropped the other two in the console unit.

"Tony? You read me?"

"Loud and clear, Ms Romanoff. I expect to see you soon."

"Soon," T'Challa said.

Something fell and rolled over in the back of the Quinjet. Natasha turned in her seat and scanned the back area. She was about to turn back to the front when something caught her eye.

"Parker!"

Peter dropped from the ceiling of the jet, yelling.

Tony nearly fell out of the sky. "The kid is on the jet?!"

Natasha sighed. "Unfortunately."

"Oww."

"You're on sentry duty," Natasha said, "you stay and guard the jet. You've done enough, and if you get hurt, that's on us, and none of us will have that."

Peter pouted behind the mask.

"Hold on, I'm patching the kid onto the frequency. If I yell, I'm not paying for hearing aides for any of you."

T'Challa laughed softly.

"Kid," Tony said a moment later, "I am at a loss for words."

Despite being at a loss for words, Tony continued ranting until he reached the base in Siberia.

* * *

The clang stopped Bucky and Steve in their tracks. Bucky let out a short and relieved laugh when it turned out to be Iron Man prying the doors open.

Tony's helmet slid back as Bucky stood up from his position.

"Stark," Bucky said with a small grin, stepped over Steve and extending his left hand.

"Barnes," Tony replied, shaking his hand. The suit collided with Bucky's metal arm, sending a harsh clang through the facility.

"Where's Nat?"

"She'll be here. She's got to pacify a stowaway."

"T'Challa?"

Tony shook his head. "Spiderman."

"The _kid_?!"

Steve walked over, still holding his shield up defensively. "What the hell is going on?"

"WAH!" The short and sharp cry was followed by a loud clang as something hit the metal grate.

All three turned to the door Tony had just pried open to see Natasha groaned as she picked herself off the floor.

"Widow?"

"I guess I missed a step," Natasha grumbled, walking towards the trio. "Your child really puts up a fight. If anyone asked, I didn't sedate him."

"He's not my -- you _sedated_ the kid?"

"Romanoff," Steve said.

Natasha turned to Steve. Tony noticed the way Natasha had come to stand closer to Bucky than the other two. "Guess you didn't tell him," she told Bucky.

"He wouldn't listen," Bucky said, throwing Steve a glare.

"What?" Steve asked.

"We staged it," Tony said, "well, not all of us. There was a reason Natasha was the one waiting for you in the hangar."

Bucky nodded. "If Stark loses his pooch pillow, then you don't get to walk when this is over."

"I'm going to ignore that jab," Tony said.

"What do you mean?"

"Your pal, Barnes over here, agreed to come quietly if I helped out, and that the rest of you will sign the Accords. Of course, no one needs to know _how_ the Winter Soldier escaped captivity yet again."

Natasha shot Tony a smile.

"Where's Catsuit?" Bucky asked.

"He's looking for Zemo," Natasha said, "your fake doctor. Is that my gun?"

Bucky glanced at the weapon he held. "Oh. Yes. Well, my kill count _is_ higher than yours." 

"What?"

Bucky shook his head. "Nothing. Let's go. If the Soldiers have been woken, then we're gonna have a mission and a half to deal with."

Steve didn't miss the way Bucky suddenly went to backing Natasha instead without even batting an eyelid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Peter's a little shit & I love him with everything I have.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony's trauma drives him to the edge of insanity   
> Peter is pivotal in forming a truce  
> T'Challa adopts broken white people

"I got heat signatures," Tony said, scanning the area with his suit.

"How many?" Steve asked.

"Uh, one."

Bucky and Natasha ventured further into the room, stopping before the illuminated pods.

"If it's any consolation, they died in their sleep."

Zemo's voice sounded on the speakers. Natasha stopped in front of the pod containing a blonde. "Stacie."

Like Stacie, all five were shot in the head.

"Did you really think I wanted more like the two of you?" Zemo asked, "pathetic, murderous, mindless _beasts_."

"Widow." Bucky reached out for Natasha, who stood still, staring at Stacie's lifeless eyes.

"That could've been me. I could've been in there," Natasha said, glancing to the far end of the room, to a sixth and empty pod.

"I'm grateful to them, though," Zemo continued, "they brought all of you here."

Lights flickered on. Natasha and Bucky stepped into a defence-offence stance, while Steve hurled his shield and Tony fired a laser beam.

Zemo only laughed behind the metal doors. "Please, the Soviets built this chamber to withstand the launch blast of UR-100 rockets."

"Bet I could top that," Tony said as he and Steve walked towards the metal door.

"Oh, I'm sure you could, Mr Stark. Given time. But then you'd never know why you came."

"You killed innocent people in Vienna just to bring us here?"

Zemo stared at Steve through the window. "I thought about nothing else for over a year. I studied you. I followed you. But now that you're standing here, I just realized . . . there's a bit of green in the blue of your eyes. How nice to find a flaw."

"You're Sokovian. Is that what this is about?"

"Sokovia was a failed state long before you blew it to hell. No. I'm here because I made a promise."

Steve studied Zemo. "You lost someone?"

"I lost _everyone_. And so will you." Zeme pressed a button. Steve stepped over to the screen. "An empire toppled by its enemies can rise again. But one which crumples from within? That's dead . . . forever."

Tony stared at the screen, anxiety rising. "I know that road. What is this?"

Bucky recognised it as well, and it seemed like Natasha did too.

The video played. Natasha jumped as a car skidded into view, and then a figure on a motorcycle. The four of them watched as Howard Stark fell out of his car, begging the stranger to help his wife. Steve watched Tony's growing unease.

They watched as the Winter Soldier pulled Howard up by his hair.

"Sergeant Barnes?" the old man asked.

Expressionless, the Winter Soldier beat Howard to death with his metal arm. Natasha closed her eyes when the Winter Soldier set Howard back in the car, his face slumped against the wheel. Beside him, Maria Stark had already bled out from a gunshot wound.

The Winter Soldier grabbed a case from the trunk, then fired at the camera.

Eyes glistening and his entire body shaking, Tony turned to Bucky, who cast his gaze downward. Tony lunged for Bucky, and Steve held him back.

"Did you know?" Tony eventually asked Steve.

"I didn't know it was him," Steve said.

"Don't bullshit me, Rogers. _Did you_ _know_?"

Steve sighed. "Yes."

Tony nodded once. All at once, his helmet shot back up and he gave Steve a solid punch before turning to Bucky.

"T'Challa, find Zemo. We have a situation." Natasha dodged the blind attacks by a hair's breadth, losing her earpiece as she did so. She didn't know who to attack to end the fight as quickly as possible.

In his blind rage, Tony sent Natasha flying into the fallen stones, knocking her out.

"Widow!"

"Go!" Steve yelled at Bucky, heading to Natasha. "I'll get her out."

Trusting Steve, Bucky took off. Tony followed relentlessly, firing a rocket at the hinge of Bucky's escape door. The metal lid clamped down again, sealing off the area. Deciding Natasha was safer off than Bucky, Steve followed.

Natasha grunted and rolled off the rocks. She squinted upwards, watching Steve and Bucky fight Tony's relentless attacks. She scrambled for the small device and shoved it back in her ear. "Tony? Tony, can you hear me?" If he could, there was no indication. "Stark!"

With a resigned sigh, Natasha patched into the Quinjet. "Kid, you wanna play superhero?"

* * *

"This isn't going to change what happened," Steve said. 

"I don't care. He killed my mom."

Tony blasted the shield from Steve and started towards Bucky. Flying over Tony's head with Natasha, Peter picked up the shield with a web. Natasha caught it and knocked Peter out of the way before crouching behind the shield, in front of Bucky, deflecting Tony's blast. "Tony, stop!"

Tony didn't lower his arm. "Nat, move."

"I killed people, too," Natasha said, standing up, not letting go of Steve's shield. "But that was all me. I never had trigger words drilled into my head to turn me into a robot of a soldier. The people I killed are dead because of me, but the people James killed? They're dead because of Hydra. You know that."

"Stand. Down." Tony gritted his teeth.

"You're setting a bad example for the kid."

Tony's helmet retracted and he turned to see Bucky helping Spiderman up, his mask in his hands. "Mr Stark?"

"You brought the kid down here?" Tony asked Natasha, shock taking over his rage.

"Mr Stark, why -- why are you fighting? I thought -- I thought -- we came here to help Captain America, didn't we?"

"And that was _before_ I found out Cap's dirty little secrets."

"Tony, you're fighting the wrong person."

"He killed my mom!"

"Your mom was dead before he even _saw_ the car!"

"Wh -- what?"

Bucky took a step towards Natasha, but moved back when Peter hissed in pain. "Widow, you saw the --"

"I saw the tape, yes. Ten years after I was released from the Red Room programme, my old instructor contacted me. She said I had been noticed, and that there were people who wanted to utilise my skills, but only if I could prove myself in all forms of . . . well, murder. I was tasked as the sniper on duty. If the mission was a success and Hydra gained the serum, then I would be given an opportunity to fight for my place amongst the Winter Soldiers. This is what I'm talking about, Tony. James had been under Hydra's control when he killed your father. I wasn't when I fired two shots, one to the tyre to throw the car off the road and the other. . ."

"Great," Tony said, his helmet locking back into place, "so the Soviet Union killed my parents. Good to know."

Natasha raised the shield over her head as Tony packed full force into his punch. The sound echoed throughout the facility.

"Nat!" Steve cried, as Bucky passed Peter to him and launched himself at Tony. "Don't _touch_ my Widow," he growled.

Steve watched in amazement as Natasha and Bucky threw the shield back and forth around Tony, using it to both shield themselves from attacks as well as deal a few of their own. If he thought he and Bucky worked well together . . . then he didn't know what Natasha and Bucky were doing.

They communicated without using any visible _or_ audible cues -- and Steve knew this for sure when, after Bucky dealt Tony a particularly hard blow, sending him sliding a few feet away, Natasha ran at Bucky and the latter seemed to throw her back at Tony. Natasha's foot connected with Tony's shoulder and sent him flying even further backwards.

Peter desperately wanted to web all of them up and stop them before one of them killed the other, but he could barely stand on his own. He knew Natasha hadn't meant it, but she'd pushed him far too hard, hard enough to fracture -- or even, break -- something. Steve couldn't let go of Peter. Every move made the teenager wince in pain. Although, it wasn't as if Steve could even manage to get between either of the three.

"Analyze their pattern!" Tony yelled at his AI.

"There isn't one," Friday replied a few seconds later, sounding distressed.

"Kill the suit, Widow," Bucky said before giving Natasha her second boost.

"Blind him."

Steve watched as Bucky threw everything he had into his metal arm and broke the suit's faceplate off. It landed beside the shield Natasha and Bucky had discarded. Momentarily blinded, Tony didn't see Natasha leap onto his back and jam her fists into the suit at his neck, releasing every taser blast she had.

The suit shuddered for a second before it died, releasing Tony just before it completely shut down. Natasha and Bucky stood over the fallen man. "I warned you about the Soviet Union comment," Natasha said.

Hysterical, Tony began to laugh.

"Mr Stark?"

It was Peter's soft voice that eventually calmed the billionaire down. He sat up. Not expecting it to be accepted, Bucky offered Tony his right hand. Tony glanced at their clasped hands before looking at Bucky and shaking his hand. "I hate you."

"I don't blame you."

"I hate _you_ even more," Tony told Natasha.

She shrugged. "Understandable and justifiable."

"I hate _you_ the _most_ ," Tony said, turning and jabbing his finger in Steve's direction.

Steve didn't acknowledge the statement.

"I'll tolerate _you_ ," Tony eventually told Peter, "but screw me over and I'll disown you and terminate your internship."

"Yes, Mr Stark," Peter said, smiling brightly.

"What now?" Bucky asked.

Natasha's broken earpiece crackled in her ear. She tapped it a few times before saying a single word. "Yes."

"Who was that, Widow?"

"T'Challa. He caught Zemo before he blew his head off. He's going to drop him off at Ross's, and then he'll be back for us."

Tony took a deep breath. "I'll blame this whole thing on Zemo if you promise to never keep secrets like this from me ever again."

"Come on, Stark," Bucky said, "Nat didn't even remember until an hour ago."

"You're pardoned, then. But I mean it. I trust you, the Avengers . . . and family," he added, acknowledging that Bucky belonged to both Steve and Natasha. "I need you to trust me back. I need you not to hide things from me."

Natasha nodded and went to give Tony a hug. The man was surprised, but he hugged her back. "If you can promise that, I promise not to try to kill any of you again."

"Let's get out of here," Bucky said, taking Natasha's hand when she let go of Tony.

" _Not_ going to stop calling you the Soviet Union, just by the way. And you already fried the suit, so there's not much else you can do."

"Can we get to the top through here?" Steve asked, nodding his head to the snow on their side.

"Yes," Bucky and Natasha said.

"Then what are we waiting for?" Tony asked, grabbing the arm of his suit.

Tony pulled his suit up, with Bucky's help. Steve carried Peter, and Natasha held on to the shield and faceplate. Natasha walked between Bucky and Steve.

"Widow."

"Hm."

"How is it that you're so easily able to use Steve's shield?"

"Now that I'm somewhat closer to the right frame of mind," Tony said, leaning a little forward, "that is a question I also have. When I held that shield a couple of years ago, it was easy to pick up and move, but to _use_ it . . . I'd have to have been wearing the suit."

Natasha shrugged, glancing at the shield attached to her arm. "I guess a little goes a long way. Because I was never fully given the serum, I had to receive a little shot before I went under each time. Maybe, over the years . . . it accumulated enough to give me a little above average strength, but not enough to make me go insane like the others."

"How long have you and Bucky worked together?" Steve asked.

"Well, the calendar says seventeen years," Bucky said.

"There were periods of suspended animation in between," Natasha said, "so I guess you can count in days how much time we had awake. I remember it being a few days to heal and rest after each thaw and mission, so maybe the number of missions we had multiplied by . . . five days."

"About a hundred days short of a year," Bucky said.

"The Soviet Union came together in _one_ year?"

"Stark, I swear to God, I'll end your entire career with a snap of my finger."

"I think it's cute, Ms Black Widow."

"Kid, I'm glad you agree with me, but you're not even supposed to be here."

"How do you decide you're in love after one year -- not even in one go?" Steve asked.

"Steve, you tripped over Peggy's heels after three _days_."

"In his defence," Natasha told Bucky, "Peggy _was_ just that great."

"You met her?" Tony asked.

"I have . . . _distorted_ memories. And besides that, Steve, you've been through this. You know what it's like to wake up one day and have someone tell you what happened yesterday was much longer ago. I don't remember much, but I know the year felt like one year _in one go_."

"Mr Stark?"

"What, kid?" Tony asked, leaning further forward to see past both Bucky and Natasha.

"Um . . . I don't -- I don't want you to fight anymore. I don't want to see my heroes split up. I don't want to see my role model become a killer."

All four of them stopped walking. Steve and Tony stared at each other, seeming to suddenly realise what they must mean to teenagers, children, and adults alike.

"All right, kid," Tony said, starting to walk again. "We won't fight. Hey, maybe you can come see the compound one day. You can tell May it's part of the internship."

Peter beamed.

"It's about time," T'Challa said when they finally reached the Quinjet.

A few minutes later, Tony stole a glance at the cockpit. "Uh, America is the other way?"

"You are not going home just yet. I know someone who can help all of you."

* * *

Everett Ross clasped his hands together after finishing his speech. " _Please_ step out of line," he told Zemo. "So how does it feel? To spend all that time, all that effort . . . and, to see it fail so spectacularly?"

Zemo leaned forward. "Did it?"

Confused, Ross frowned. "Um, yeah?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHO IS EXCITED TO SEE SHURI???  
> DID IT? DID IT FAIL??
> 
> Also:  
> SHURIxPETER IS A WHOLESOME FRIENDSHIP THAT I LOVE WITH EVERY CELL IN MY BODY AND SCREW MARVEL FOR NOT GIVING IT TO ME  
> SHURI ROASTS OLD (but not really) WHITE PEOPLE WITHOUT FEAR AND I LOVE HER
> 
> I am excited for the things that I wrote, wow, someone send post-endgame help pls
> 
> on the other hand, happy chapters coming up to distract me and you from what endgame did to us =)


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "shoot Steve in the knee"

Shuri stared at the five people her brother brought into her lab. "Brother!" she exclaimed excitedly, "you made friends!"

"I'm not even surprised," T'Challa said.

"Who is this?" Natasha asked.

"My younger sister, Shuri. Shuri, these are . . . they are friends."

Shuri scanned each one, stopping at the boy Steve still carried. "You look familiar."

"I like your accent," Peter said honestly.

"Thanks, I'm Liberian."

"You are Wakandan," T'Challa said.

"Oh, sorry," Peter said. He lowered his voice to a whisper. "I like your accent."

Shuri was silent for a few seconds. "I'm actually a lesbian," she tried again.

"Since when?" T'Challa asked.

"Oh," Peter said, "I thought you were Wakandan."

T'Challa sighed at the wide smile that spread across his sister's face. "In hindsight, this may not have been a wise decision."

"Spiderman!"  

* * *

"You seem unharmed."

Natasha turned to the princess that had walked up to her. "Yes?"

"My brother said that we can help all five of you. You seem _physically_ unharmed."

"I'm fine," Natasha said with a small smile.

"Sergeant Barnes mentioned that you have memories you'd like to retrieve. We can -- I can look into it if you want. He's accepted my offer of the same nature."

"How do you bring back lost memories?" Natasha asked, turning back to the Wakandan landscape.

"Memories are never truly _lost_. If they were made, they can be remembered. You just need a small nudge. We can work on it."

Natasha studied the teenage genius. "You remind me of Stark," she murmured.

Shuri beamed. "That's what Mr Stark said, only he mentioned that I've surpassed him."

"How modest."

Shuri clasped her hands behind her back and swayed on the spot. "You know, the Black Widow was always my favourite Avenger."

Natasha turned to Shuri. "Why?"

Shuri shrugged. "Why not? Anyway, you should come speak to Sergeant Barnes. He's going to go back under the ice for a while."

"He's going to _what_?"

Natasha nearly knocked Steve over as she barreled into the lab. T'Challa ushered Tony to the other end, where someone worked on healing Peter's broken ribs. Natasha glared at Bucky. "Are you _insane_?"

Bucky stared up at Natasha. "Don't ask stupid questions, Widow."

"I'm being serious, James. Why are you doing this?"

Bucky shrugged. "It's safest for --"

"Bullshit. You know what, if you go under, so will I."

"For what?" Bucky asked, standing up, "you don't have triggers ingrained in your head that turn you into a mindless soldier."

"You don't know that. Neither do I. But that's not even the point. Who here is going to use any of them? They're all _Russian_."

"Widow, it's--"

"I don't want to hear it. You just got back and now you want to go and knock yourself out for who knows how long. At this rate, I'll die of old age before you even reach forty."

"Come on, Nat. It's not forever."

" _You_ wouldn't feel the difference, Soldier. But us? We're going to feel it. We're gonna be the ones waiting around for you. We're gonna have to deal with your absence. Again. I don't have the strength, or the patience, or even the _memories_ to remind you who I am. I swear to God, James, if you go under, I'll -- I'll--" Natasha sputtered, trying to find a threat that didn't involve killing Bucky "-- I'll shoot Steve in the knee!"

"Hey!"

"You know," Shuri spoke up, leaning against what would have been Bucky's cryonic chamber, "you could just . . . _isolate_ yourself. I'd come to see you and try to fix you away from the city."

"I like that idea," Natasha said.

"I like any idea that doesn't involve Natasha shooting my leg."

Bucky rolled his eyes. "Widow, you're being --"

"Shut your face, Barnes, the genius said you don't have to go under."

Bucky blinked, not really used to hearing Natasha say his last name. He found he quite liked the way she said it.

Shuri smiled. "I have my clever moments. We have goats that need tending."

"I'm not tending to goats," Bucky said, shaking his head.

"You'll love them," Shuri said, "most of them are white and do dumb things, kind of like you people."

The three stared at Shuri until she laughed. "I'm joking." She waved a hand at them. "Peter would have laughed."

"That's because Peter's not eighty-five years older than you," Steve said.

"I am not eighty-five years older than her!" Natasha cried.

"It's only about forty years between us," Shuri said after a few seconds of Natasha glaring at Steve.

"How do you know?" Bucky asked, curious.

Shuri tapped one of the beads of her bracelet. All three leaned closer, more curious than any of them had ever been. They watched the images fly by as Shuri swiped at them, until she spun the little silver bead around and showed them what looked like a holographic report.

"Hydra records claim to have recruited the Black Widow, aged twenty-eight, in the year 1991. It's simple math. You were born the year Kennedy died. Conspiracy! The Black Widow is President Kennedy reincarnated!"

Peter sat up despite the pain. "Conspiracy theory accepted!"

"I like that boy," Shuri told the three with a smile, "I'm going to give him cheats for school."

"On second thought, maybe I _am_ too old for you lot."

Shuri smiled as the images disappeared. "All these jokes aside, I _can_ still work on your mind while you're conscious. There's just . . . a slightly bigger risk of accidentally turning you into the obedient machine of a soldier, but cognitive recalibration should fix it without any worries."

"I'll hit him really hard in the head," Natasha said with a nod.

With a sigh, Bucky nodded at Shuri. "But I am _not_ watching goats."

"We'll see. Ms Romanoff, would you like to help me prepare?"

Steve snorted as they watched Natasha leave with Shuri, the latter asking questions about memories.

"What?" Bucky asked.

"You're _whipped_. It's new. I'm amazed. I've never seen anyone else change your mind so easily. Not even I could do that."

Bucky raised his eyebrows at Steve. "Why are you surprised? I thought you've worked with her before? And I don't mean the whole Avengers groupie-thing you guys have going on."

"Washington? Yeah, that was one of her wilder missions with me. I blame you."

"She's not _wild_ , Steve, she's . . . okay, yes, she is."

Steve smiled. "Buck, you are _so_ whipped."

"Will you relax? I haven't even kissed her yet."

"There are two things I'd like to point out. First, yet. Second, I'm willing to bet my life you have."

Bucky folded his arms. "If I have, I don't remember. Therefore, it hasn't happened."

"How could you forget Nat's kisses?"

"You kissed Nat?" Bucky asked, turning to look at Steve in amazement.

"Don't get jealous. We were on the run and she said --"

"Public displays of affection make people uncomfortable, yeah, I'm remembering bit by bit. I'm not jealous, I'm disappointed. I thought you mustered up the courage to kiss a girl, turns out _she_ kissed _you_. Pitiful that you haven't gotten down to it in your ninety-eight years of life."

"I _have_ ki--" Steve started to argue and was about to mention Peggy when he realised that it had been Peggy who had kissed him. "Sharon!"

"Doesn't count, it took forever to happen."

Steve gave Bucky a side-glance and a frown. "I liked you better before you fell off that train."

"Yeah, and I liked you better before you blew up to twice my size. Tough, we don't all get to keep what we like."

Steve sighed. "This is why none of your girlfriends stuck. You're a very trying person to deal with."

"Nat stuck for seventeen years."

"Technically only _one_."

"The calendar says seventeen."

Steve sighed. "I forgot how pesky you can be."

Bucky smiled. "I could always factory reset and go back to being mindlessly obedient?"

Steve rolled his eyes. "This is why I'm going to leave you here in Wakanda. I hope you don't annoy Nat into leaving Wakanda."

Bucky's smile grew as he watched Natasha talk to Shuri while the two of them sat at Shuri's table.

Steve smiled at his best friend. "So, this is what Bucky Barnes looks like when he's in love. Good to know."

"I am _not_ in love," Bucky defended automatically, scrunching up his nose as he three Steve a glare.

Steve smiled as he looked up at Natasha staring at Bucky. "Don't worry. It looks like she feels the same."

Bucky looked up, but Natasha was focused on Shuri once again. "And what is that?"

"Some kind of love, buried under layers of confusion. Listen, I'm going to talk to Tony."

"Ask him what happened to the flying car."

"Ask him yourself," Steve said, already walking to the billionaire. "Tony? Can we talk?"

With a small nod, Tony followed Steve out to where Natasha had been standing. "Yeah?"

"Um, I wanted to apologise."

"For?"

"Lying. Keeping secrets. I remember two years ago, it was the exact same thing that I hated about what Fury had. He called it compartmentalisation. Of course, this isn't the same thing. I thought -- I thought that maybe I was sparing you by not telling you that your parents didn't die in a car crash. I was wrong. Look, I know Bucky told you that if you helped us, we'd sign the Accords but, Tony, I just -- I can't. We don't even know what we're going to lose with it . . ."

Tony pulled his hands out of his pockets and folded his arms. He stared out the window. "I'm going back to the compound once they're done fixing Parker up. I'll drop him off in Queens, make up some lie to his aunt. And then . . . then I'm going to discretely move the compound somewhere else."

Steve turned halfway to Tony. "What for?"

"Well, if I'm going to break people out of the raft and set fire to the Accords, I have to have a pretty solid hiding spot, equipped with cloaking technology better than the Quinjets."

"You . . . you're going to _what_?"

"Screw the Accords, Steve," Tony said, sounding as exasperated as Natasha when she had said the same. "Screw the Accords, screw Zemo, screw Hydra, Shield, the US government, screw everyone. Everything that's happened since Thaddeus Ross first tossed that stack of papers at us is because your pal didn't kill the camera before he killed my dad. If there was no proof, Zemo would have had nothing to bait me into wanting to kill both of you. Without that, he would have never framed Barnes for that bombing. There wouldn't have been a tipping point for Ross to hand us the Accords."

"So, what you're saying is. . .?"

"I'm done, Rogers. I am _done_ with letting other people ruin my life when I can do a perfectly good job of it all on my own. I went as far as trapping Wanda in the compound. Rhodes is learning to walk again with braces. I still don't know where Banner is. I pushed a fifteen-year-old kid into the middle of my fights and he landed up with broken ribs. I so much wanted to blow Barnes' brains out. I wanted to bash your head in with your own shield. And Nat? I wanted to rip her apart limb by limb. I am done letting people use my emotions to control me. I don't give a damn. Screw whatever I said about needing someone to keep up in check. I'm a disaster and I get things done that way."

Steve chuckled. "You surprise me, Tony."

"Look, we wrapped up Loki and the Chitauri in days, we killed Ultron in about two and we couldn't even _stand_ _up_ to an ordinary human being with a tape. Okay, so the Soviet Union killed my parents. It's going to take some getting used to, but Nat's one of my closest friend and Barnes is one of yours. Whatever they did twenty-five years ago, it's not who they are today. I just . . . I'm trying not to let anyone tear the Avengers apart. Maybe I was going about it wrong before, maybe I'm going about it wrong now, but I'm doing my best and God help us all if that's not enough."

"Tony, your best is good enough. We've all made mistakes. You believed the Accords was the way to go. If you're saying all this despite still believing in it, then regardless, you should stick with the fact that you signed it. You did what you believed in. It's all any of us can do. It's all any of should do."

"I believe in the _Avengers_ , Cap, and if the Accords is what's tearing us up, then I will burn it to the ground."

Natasha coughed softly, leaning against the wall. "I know a good burning site."

"Of course you do," Tony said.

"Tony, I'll sign--"

"There won't be anything to sign," Tony said, "they threw everyone into the Raft, Nat. You saw that place. That's no way to treat Earth's mightiest heroes. The Accords aren't there to keep us in line, they're there to control us and turn us into puppets. Frankly, I'm not even surprised. You hide here in Wakanda. You'll be safe. Keep an eye on the other half of the Soviet Union, okay?"

"I swear, Stark --"

"Capsicle over here is going to break into the raft and I . . . well, seeing as I'm the billionaire, I guess I'm going to have to buy us a new compound. Do swing by when the princess has stabilised the Soviet Union."

Natasha narrowed her eyes at Tony. "One more time, Stark, and I'll rewire Friday to curse every time Pepper is nearby."

"You hate me," Tony said. He turned to Steve. "She hates me."

"All hatred aside," Natasha said, giving both a hug, "the Avengers is a cute little mismatched family we have going on, and it's more important than a stack of pages. If you really want to give the US government the finger, know that we'll be right behind you."

Tony smiled. "I'm gonna go call them a bunch of bumbling buffoons right before I set fire to the damn thing."

"Wait," Steve said, "you're going to _literally_ burn the Accords?"

"What part of 'set fire' and 'burn' did you not grasp, Steve?"

A few days later, Tony called everyone present a bunch of bumbling buffoons as promised, then dumped vodka from a flask over the Accords and lit a match. No one had time to save the pages before they burned. "See, this is why you should've have digitalised the Accords to. Anyway, don't bother looking for me, I'm off to a nice vacation in the Bahamas. I'll be back never. Adios, assholes."

Tony Stark was gone before the flames disappeared. They tracked _something_ to the Bahamas, only to find an empty Iron Man suit lounging on a deck chair. Tony Stark had, along with nearly everyone who had been asked to sign the Accords, vanished into thin air.

About two weeks after the bombing at the UN, Natasha woke up to something she didn't quite like the sound of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 2008 Tony lived for the drama and I need him back
> 
> also, I think the flashbacks return in the next chapter idk anymore


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everett Ross is Confused™  
> There are love confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> makes mention to Black Panther

Natasha woke up to the sound of something blowing up. She sat up, swinging her legs off the edge of the low bed. She walked to the doorway and peered up at the sky.

" _This is Dora Milaje uniform_."

" _Why are you leaving it here?_ "

" _Just in case._ "

" _I'm not one of your warriors._ "

" _It's_ armour. _Just in case._ "

Bucky and Natasha spent most of the day asleep, often. Shuri would visit in the mornings and spend time with each of them -- more Bucky than Natasha. It was no small matter to have someone prying into your head, and more often than not, both would succumb to sleep after Shuri left.

So it was no surprise that Bucky and Natasha got to experience Wakanda's nights more than her days.

Bucky woke up to the sound of metal on metal. Squinting into the doorway, it looked as if it was still daylight. Natasha's bed was empty. Pushing himself up with his one arm, Bucky saw her in the corner of the room, testing out a spear Shuri had left with her.

"Widow."

Natasha spun around, aiming the spear at Bucky.

"I'm still me."

"It's not for you," Natasha said, wrapping her own -- enhanced by the princess -- stun bracelets around her wrists. "You stay here, I'll go and see what's happening."

"Why? What is it?"

"Something blew up in the sky, so things are definitely _not_ all right in the city. Stay here, where you're safe."

Bucky stood up and grabbed Natasha's arm before she left. "Why should I let _you_ go, then?"

"One of us has to show some gratitude to the king."

"I'm coming with you."

"I'll stun you, Soldier. You're not fit for battle -- if that's what it is. And besides, I'm not running into the fray. I'm going to check Shuri's lab, see if she's okay."

Bucky sighed. "Fine. Fine, but you better get back here _unharmed_."

"I make no promises, Soldier," Natasha said with a smile before leaving the hut.

True to her word, Natasha avoided the battle, keeping out of sight as best as she could. Someone was definitely in the lab. She couldn't see who, but it definitely wasn't Shuri.

"Glass integrity at twenty-five percent."

"Shit," Natasha murmured. She left the lab via the way she'd come and jumped down the jets' pathway at the top, driving her borrowed spear into the jet that was firing at the glass. The jet faltered.

"Glass integrity at fifteen percent."

Natasha took out it's engine, running the spear straight through the whole thing. It plummeted, but not before the glass completely shattered. It did, however, give Natasha a window to leap through. She stood at the edge, watching the jet hit the cave floor with a loud crash.

The sand collapsed and Everett Ross hit his ass on the floor. He was about to let Shuri know he'd succeeded in shooting down all the planes when he noticed someone in Dora Milaje uniform amongst the shattered glass, overlooking the edge. With fiery hair in a single braid and hands the colour of snow, he knew she wasn't Wakandan, let alone one of the Dora.

Natasha turned around to see who it was she had -- hopefully -- rescued.

"Agent Romanoff."

"It -- it's Nat," she said, shrugging, "I go by Nat. Nice seeing you again, Ross."

"Your buddy Stark set fire to the Accords."

Natasha nodded. "The flask of vodka was my parting gift to him."

"I should take you back when I leave."

"Or you could pretend like you never saw me. You've seen what Wakanda can do. Do you really think I can get into much trouble around here?"

Ross stilled for a second, then snatched a small disc of the table and handed it to Natasha. "Shuri says to put one on."

Natasha complied.

" _GET OUT_ OF THE LAB!"

Natasha grabbed Ross's wrist and pulled him along. "Shuri, nice to hear from you again."

"What are you doing in my lab?" Shuri demanded. "You should be on the edge of Wakanda!"

"Had to help," Natasha said, guiding Ross out of the lab. "I didn't know you weren't in the lab."

"So, why are you here?" Ross asked, glancing back at Natasha.

She pushed his head down and ducked with him as a beam flew over their heads. "Stop talking. Keep moving." As they passed, Natasha grabbed another spear, this one with the ability to fire blasts of energy.

Natasha pushed Ross into a room and fought everyone that tried to get through. Ross watched in amazement as Natasha expertly handled the Wakandan weapons. She peered up and down the corridor before motioning for Ross to follow her.

"Agent Rom--"

"Nat. My name is Nat."

"Nat," Ross said slowly, "why are you here in Wakanda?"

"I'm recovering -- duck!"

Ross ducked and Natasha fired a blast over him. The man raised his shield, but he still flew back a few feet.

"Recovering from what, exactly?" Ross asked as Natasha pulled him along.

"Recovering old memories. Now be quiet."

Frowning, Ross kept silent as they made their way out of the lab. Someone misfired a weapon, and Natasha saw it coming. With seconds to spare, she pushed Ross behind the stone wall and collapsed beside him.

"Ow."

"You're bleeding."

"Mmhm. Help me up."

"Shuri, we need -- Shuri?" Ross felt for the earpiece, but it was missing.

"Mine's gone too," Natasha said, "Shuri is bit held up elsewhere. You gotta promise to keep your mouth shut."

"What, you have superhuman abilities?"

"No, but I know someone who does -- which is besides the point. Just help me."

* * *

"Soldier!"

Bucky grunted and turned his face into the pillow. Natasha had told him to stay back, and he wasn't about to go outside without her backup. The animals and children liked her more, anyway. He'd fallen asleep again.

Natasha pointed to the empty bed, and Ross helped her to it.

"Soldier."

Bucky grunted again. "What?"

"If I die, I'll kill you."

Bucky sat up rather quickly -- impressive, without his prosthetic -- and looked around the room wildly. "Widow?"

"I'm not dead yet."

Bucky scrambled from his bed and tumbled over to Natasha's side. He still hadn't noticed Ross. "Didn't I tell you to get back here unharmed?"

"I met an old friend. I'm getting slower with each day."

Bucky clicked his tongue and removed the metal plates, then lifted the Dora Milaje uniform to reveal Natasha's wound. "You have a death wish, Widow."

"Ross has Kimoyo beads."

"Ross? Wh--"

"Do you need these?" Ross asked, holding out his wrist to Bucky.

"Where did you get them?" Bucky asked, taking one off the bracelet and inserting it in the wound. "Call Shuri."

"Call? Wh-- _how_?"

"Just give it here."

Natasha laughed to herself as Bucky flicked one bead off the bracelet.

"That's the same thing T'Challa did when I got shot in Korea," Ross said, gesturing to Natasha.

"T'Challa went to Korea?" Natasha asked, "and he didn't invite us. How mean."

"Shut up," Bucky muttered as Shuri finally formed out of black sand above his palm.

"What is it?"

"Natasha. She's wounded, barely alive. You never said Ross was in Wakanda."

"Yeah, she never said _you_ were either," Ross grumbled.

"I'm on my way."

"What exactly is happening out there?" Bucky asked, handing the bracelet back to Ross.

"How do you not know?"

Bucky shrugged. "Isolation is peaceful and it's also far enough from the city that I have no clue what's happening. Nat woke up and said something was exploding, so she went to look for Shuri in the lab. I assume that's where she found you."

Ross nodded. He glanced at the intricately designed beanbag next to Natasha's bed. Bucky nodded. "She usually doesn't like other people sitting in her chair, and it's only been hers for about two weeks. You can't say that you saw us here."

"Part of my job is to keep my eyes peeled for all of you. If I come across two of you, it's my job to --"

"We were both assassins once, and we were the best at it. We'll find you and make sure you never speak about us or the others ever again. I don't care about your job. I care about finally getting a chance to live in peace."

Natasha grunted, then laughed. "Are you trying to sound threatening again?"

"Shut up," Bucky muttered, glancing at her smile, "you clearly don't understand the definition of unharmed."

Natasha laughed softly.

"I'm confused. What exactly is the relationship between you two?"

"We don't know yet. Shuri's helping us delve into our memories to find out. Speaking of, there she is."

"What happened?" Shuri demanded, almost pushing Ross out of the way. Bucky let Ross explain and then they both watched Shuri work in silence.

"I would have taken her back to the lab, but there's critical damage in there. Half the equipment won't work."

"I'd be worried," Bucky said, "but you're smarter than broken equipment."

Shuri gave Bucky a smile.

"Ow," Natasha muttered, frowning.

"Hey, look who's fully conscious!" Shuri said.

"Ow," Natasha repeated. She threw Ross a glare. "You owe me. Keep your mouth shut and we'll call it even."

Ross raised his hands in surrender. "Fine. Who's going to believe me anyway? Everyone thinks the nation of Wakanda is a third world country too poor to even feed half the tiny population it has. Who in their right mind would think Wakanda has the resources to house two of the most wanted people by the US government?"

"I see you wore the Dora Milaje uniform," Shuri said, standing up and dusting her hands off.

"It's _armour_. Just in case."

Shuri smiled. "Try to be a little more careful. I might have to ask one of our doctors to permanently tail you. Agent Ross, follow me. My brother will send you home."

Ross glanced back at Natasha, who was being scolded in furious whispers by Bucky, before following Shuri.

Natasha eventually rolled off the bed and ducked behind a curtain to peel off the Dora Milaje uniform. Bucky stood on the other side of the curtain.

"Look, I'm not angry with _you_ , I'm just . . . angry."

"That doesn't even make sense, Soldier."

"I told you not to go, Widow. I told you to stay."

Natasha sighed. "Wakanda is keeping us safe. The goddamn princess is taking out time in her day to help us. You want me to just sit back when the country is in trouble?"

"No, I want you to stay safe. You ran right into danger. You got hurt pretty badly. If not for your prolonged exposure to small doses of the serum, you'd have died before you made it here."

Natasha yanked the curtain back. For a moment, Bucky was distracted by the busy black patterns on the pale pink dress she wore. Well, to be more specific, he was distracted by the way the dress hugged her body. "What was I supposed to do, James? Let _him_ get shot?"

"I don't know! I just can't lose you. I don't even remember _having_ you, and yet I'm so afraid of losing you. It drives me insane that I can't remember how I'm supposed to feel about you, and I'm so afraid that you'll go and get yourself killed and that's when I'll remember. It won't just be a fact that I know, I'll have to feel everything. You're a disaster magnet, Natalia, and danger follows you like a lost toddler. I understand that you will most likely get into a dangerous situation should one arise, but can't you think about _me_ before anyone else? Call it selfish if you want, but I-- I just . . . it hurts to see you hurt, and it hurts even more that I don't properly know why."

Natasha stared up at Bucky. "I'm sorry, Soldier."

Bucky sighed. He brushed her hair back. "Just . . . try to be more careful in the future."

Natasha stared at Bucky for a moment, while he stared anywhere but her face. "James."

"Hm?"

"Kiss me."

Bucky couldn't help the grin when he lifted his gaze to her. "Why? And don't you start your whole spiel about public displays of affection because there is no public --"

"And now I regret it."

Natasha turned to pick up the uniform, but Bucky caught her wrist. "I'm teasing, Widow. Come here."

**_~~ 1995 ~~_ **

Natalia threw the door open and slammed it closed. "All right. What the hell? I've been woken for three missions this year alone only to find out that you went and completed them by yourself."

The Winter Soldier barely glanced up from the knife he was cleaning. "On our last mission together, you threw yourself into the line of fire. Why?"

"Because you took a dizzying hit to your head. You weren't focused. You'd have been hit. I wasn't about to let the enemy gun down my partner."

"Yes, but you took a rather fatal hit. If not for the serum Karpov gave you when you returned, _you_ would have been dead."

Natalia only shrugged. "So? The missions we go on are secondary. My _primary_ mission is keeping Hydra's greatest asset alive."

"Bullshit. It's _my_ primary mission to watch _you_. You who have no superhuman abilities, who is not indestructible, and who has no other shield but _me_."

"Oh, come _on_ , Soldier. I'm not incapable. Before Hydra, I took on many solo assignments, and I succeeded in each one. Why do you feel the need to protect me?"

"Because I love you!" There was silence after the Winter Soldier hurled his knife into the wooden post of his ridiculous excuse of a bed. "I -- I _think_. . . I don't know. Emotions aren't things the Winter Soldier is good at."

Natalia looked like she had seen a ghost. "If that's what love is . . . if love is wanting to keep someone safe, worrying about them despite knowing that they're more than capable of looking after themselves . . . then I think . . . I think I love you too."

"You shouldn't."

"I know. Hydra will discard us. Or maybe they'll just wipe me like they do for you every time."

"I'm sorry."

"For what?" Natalia asked, stepped forward and taking his right hand in both of hers. "I grew up learning that love is for children, that it's weak and it makes a person weak. I grew up learning that love is a distraction, that it helps no one. But I'm starting to think that I was taught that so that the Red Room could send out mindless killers with no mercy. They did to me what Hydra did to you, but in a very different way. I've seen love prolong the life of some of my targets because their loved ones did everything in their power to keep my targets alive and safe. I've seen love save people and kill people and yet, people still believe in it. Can it really be so bad, then?"

"We aren't just people, Widow. We're agents, Hydra agents. We don't get the luxury of emotions like other people."

"Then we'll have to steal kisses between missions."

"I'll forget."

Natalia lifted herself on tiptoes and kissed his cheek. "I'll remind you. Every time. I promise."

She had halfway lowered herself back to the floor when he wrapped both arms around her and kissed her. With his metal arm keeping a secure grip on her small waist, he snaked the other up until he cradled her head. Eventually, he let her put both feet firmly on the ground again, leaning his forehead against hers.

"You don't belong to Hydra," he murmured, "you are _mine_ , and I'll fight anyone who tries to take you from me."

She smiled, refusing to open her eyes to the Hydra base around her. "My Soldier," she whispered, giving him another, quick kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SKKSFIWHOWJDKZJSFJFSFLA I AM _SAD_
> 
> I decided that since I started putting up chapters of this, I should continue writing it, BUT THE CHAPTERS I HAVE TO WRITE TAKE PLACE DURING ENDGAME I DON'T HAVE THE STRENGTH TO READ THE TRANSCRIPT OF THAT MOVIE 
> 
> i cri


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "shoot Steve in the knee" becomes a phrase
> 
> Shuri is a genius  
> Peter is threatened
> 
> Natalia and James forget they have a mission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to clarify that i _do not_ speak Xhosa. Every word of the language that I use was thrown at me by Google Translate. Corrections here and in future chapters are welcomed and encouraged.

**_~~ 2017 ~~_ **

Shuri glanced at the pair of ex-assassins that gave her blank stares. "Did it work? Do you remember anything new? Any old memories get clearer?"

"This is unnatural," Natasha whispered.

"This is un _human_ ," Bucky mumbled.

Neither seemed to be looking at anything in particular. Shuri moved to stand between their chairs. "What? Did I do it wrong? Did I hurt you?"

Natasha was smiling suddenly, tears threatening to fall. "No," she said, still in that same whisper, "nothing is wrong."

Shuri glanced at Bucky, whose eyes glistened, but he didn't smile.

"What do you see?" Shuri asked a moment later, realising that they really _weren't_ looking at anything she could see.

"Everything. I see all of them. Every single memory I ever made."

"Bucky?"

"I see memories I didn't even know I had."

Shuri made mental note about that. "Talk to me. What else? Anything specific? What sticks out most to you? Focus on something."

As one, they both spoke. "Hydra."

Shuri winced. "Maybe not _that_ something?"

"We first met on the night of the crash," Natasha said, "you didn't know my name or what I looked like. I gave you a device that I would track to find the Hydra base."

"I waited two days before you showed up. I learnt that you were the Black Widow that everyone wanted -- either to recruit or to eliminate."

Shuri pulled a chair over and sat down. "What else? Sift through your memories. Give me a random fact that you shouldn't ordinarily be able to remember."

"You had a tiny scar on your shoulder," Natasha said, "it looked like it was from scraping against a wall or something. Tiny, meaningless, harmless."

"Bucky?" Shuri asked.

"When you first entered the base, the ends of your hair were black. You were growing out a disguise."

"Incredible," Shuri murmured. "What do you feel? Any pain? Any . . . _lack_ of feeling?"

"It's a hell of a lot of emotions," Natasha said, "nothing like I've ever felt before."

And then she blinked. Just like that, whatever trance Natasha had slipped into, it was broken with a mere blink. Natasha turned to Bucky as he slowly came back to reality.

"I remember _everything_ ," Bucky said.

Shuri stood up. "I'll leave you two to gather your thoughts. You can leave whenever you're ready."

"Shuri," Bucky called.

"Thank you," Natasha said when the princess turned around.

Shuri smiled. "You're welcome."

Bucky stood up first and pulled Natasha up from her chair. "You remember everything?"

"Mm. I remember Hydra, I remember before Hydra, and after Hydra. The Red Room. Shield feeding me lies about my age and the things I'd done. Everything."

"It's . . . unnerving, to say the least."

Natasha smiled. "But it's better than having all those questions, hm?"

"I suppose. We don't have to let Steve know we're okay, do we?" Bucky asked, settling his hand on her lower back, pulling her close.

"Why?" His question confused Natasha, but the gesture felt familiar in ways that she could not even begin to describe. She felt as if she had never ever been any safer.

"Well, it's been about twenty or so years since I fell in love with you and not once have we ever had the opportunity to even spend a little time in pure peace without constantly looking over our shoulders. Here in Wakanda, we can have days like those whenever we want. It could be like that daily. Out there, we're wanted people. It's no Hydra, but we'll never be at peace. Come on, I'll even watch Shuri's goddamn goats."

Natasha laid her head on Bucky's shoulder. "We don't have to tell Steve anything."

* * *

"Say a word to Steve and we will assassinate your internet connection," Natasha hissed a few weeks later.

Peter swallowed his rising fear. "Yes, ma'am! Can I-- SHURI!" 

Shuri lifted her head from behind a prototype of some kind she was working on. "Stop scaring my friend, colonizers! Parker, I made these for you so you can give them to that girl you like on Valentine's Day."

"Shuri!" Peter cried, face flushing.

"What? You said you wanted my help."

"I wanted _advice_ from a reliable girl! Not a . . . what is that, anyway?"

"This, my friend, will either get you that date for homecoming later this year, or your school is going to go boom. I don't know yet. Want to test it out?"

Satisfied that Peter wouldn't mention Bucky's perfect mental health to Steve, Natasha and Bucky left Shuri's lab. They were fairly certain Shuri wouldn't actually do something life threatening -- not in her lab, anyway.

"The kid scares me," Bucky confessed as they walked.

"Why?" An amused smile tugged at Natasha's lips.

"He reminds me of Steve a little. Steve faked his identity six times to get into the army. While Peter's much smarter and can take care of himself better than Steve could back then, I'm a hundred percent sure Peter would've done the same."

"He's got the heart of a hero."

Bucky shuddered. "That's what scares me. He's going to get into something he can't handle."

"He'll be fine. Tony looks out for him without even realising, and he's got Shuri giving him tips and tricks"

"Shuri?" Bucky asked, glancing at Natasha, " _Shuri_? She would help him fake his identity!"

"True, but not before she made sure he had state of the art protection and tricks up his sleeve. She would never help him with something like unless she was certain she'd given him good enough defence."

"Nat!"

Natasha turned around to see a young child running up to her. "Are you busy?"

"Not at the moment," she said, crouching down, "why?"

The young boy shook his head. "We wanted to know if you wanted to play." As he said this, the child looked behind Natasha at Bucky.

"Who's we, Azari?" Natasha asked, a smile on her face.

"My friends!" he cried, looking surprised, "you didn't forget, did you?"

"Of course not," Natasha said with a smile as she stood up. "Come on, let's go fight some evil villains."

For the next thirty minutes, Bucky watched Natasha entertain a number of Wakandan children, pretending to be evil by wearing the ridiculous masks they'd made. Natasha listened intently as they told her what each 'villain' was capable of before letting her wear the mask.

Natasha grabbed one of the little girls. "I've kidnapped one of you!" she cried, giving them a fake roar from behind the mask, "now what will you do?"

"Attack!"

Natasha tried very hard not to laugh as they swarmed her, toppling her over, knocking the mask off.

"Oh, no! I'm losing! Where is my Soldier?"

Bucky laughed from his seat. "I'm revolting," he said, "I've changed sides."

"Traitor," Natasha snapped, smiling.

"We won! We won again! We won!"

Natasha sat up slowly. "I need a break," she mumbled.

"Can we play again?" a little girl asked.

"Maybe tomorrow, _omncinci_ ," Natasha said. She glanced at Bucky. "If you're not going to fight with me, could you at least help me up?"

Bucky grinned as he stood up and offered Natasha his arm.

"I cannot believe you would switch sides like that."

"They swayed me over with kind words and puppy-dog eyes."

"Fair enough."

"Hungry?" Bucky asked, gesturing to the table under the straw and wooden gazebo.

"Starving," Natasha cried melodramatically.

"Right this way, oh evil -- what was that last one?"

Natasha shrugged and they walked to the table. "It _looked_ like a fish . . . but I'm not sure. What is that anyway?"

"My famous stir fry. Steve used to go _nuts_ for it way back when."

Natasha sniffed the air. "I don't blame him. It smells divine."

"Wait until you _taste_ it," Bucky said, dishing out for her before sitting down himself.

Natasha admitted a few seconds later that it was the best thing she had ever tasted -- and that included the time Shuri's mother had shown her how to bake a cheesecake.

"For a cold-blooded assassin, you're surprisingly good with children."

Natasha shrugged. "You can blame that on Clint's kids. Callum was born a few months before Clint took me to his home. After I started working with Shield, I kept visiting back with Clint. Until . . . well, I've bonded really well with Callum and Nicole, but Nath is another story. I doubt he'll be able to remember seeing me."

"Do you miss them?"

"A little. But these kids are growing on me."

Bucky returned Natasha's smile. "They like you a lot."

"Because I wear their dumb masks and play with them. You should try it. Great stress reliever."

"Children _cause_ stress."

"Only if you're the parent. When you're not, you can easily hand them back to their parents."

Bucky shook his head. "No. I refuse. If I start entertaining one of them, I'll never be at peace. I mean, I already have to deal with Parker visiting every now and then. I'll shoot Steve in the knee if I have to deal with more."

Natasha laughed. "You know, I really didn't mean for that to become a phrase you'd use for anything and everything."

Bucky shrugged. "Sue me. I'll just shoot Steve in the knee."

"James!"

He laughed. "Okay, okay. I'll stop for a while."

Natasha sighed. "Remind me again why I put up with you?"

"Because I'm fabulous and amazing, and I have great hair, and you pity this one-armed ex-assassin."

Natasha raised her eyebrows.

"Oh, and because you love me more than anything else in the world."

"Unfortunately," Natasha murmured.

"Great, so it's mutual, then."

"If you don't stop, _I'm_ going to shoot Steve in the knee."

Bucky smiled. He glanced out to the open field, where the group of children were now fighting each other. "Do you think you could handle one of them?"

Natasha glanced at them as the one with the mask feigned death and his 'army' swore vengeance. "Of my own? Nope."

"I think you could."

"You think a lot of things, Soldier, and you're not always correct."

"I'm pretty sure I'm right."

"Well, even if you are, we'd never know. Graduation from the Red Room involves eliminating the one thing that could matter more than a mission and . . . well, we'd never know."

"That's not true. How many orphanages are there out all over the planet?"

Natasha shook her head, stabbing a slice of green pepper with her fork. "I'm a wonderful babysitter, Soldier, and a very capable part-time parent, but . . . no, I don't think you're right."

"I'm so convinced I'm right, I'll shoot Steve in the knee if I'm wrong."

Natasha shot him a glare.

"Right, oops, sorry. Uhh . . . I'd steal something from Shuri's lab if I'm wrong."

"Now _that_ is starting to convince me," Natasha said with a smile. 

**_~~ 1998 ~~_ **

"Widow?"

"What is it, Soldier?"

"I love you."

Natalia lifted her head off his chest. He kept playing with her hair. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said, giving her a smile, "I just felt like it needed to be said."

She sighed. "Tomorrow we take out the target and go back to Hydra."

"I know. I wish we could prolong all our missions like this. Far from Karpov, no surveillance, no chips, no microphones. Just you and me."

Natalia's fingers found her pendant. "You and me, in our own little bubble."

"You'd make an amusing mother," James blurted, thinking of the dramatic act Natalia had put up a few hours earlier in order to give him a window to steal the keys to the room they stayed in.

"Maybe, but you and me both know it's impossible."

"Because we're Hydra."

"Even then, it wouldn't be possible. In the Red Room, when you graduate and become a professional spy, they hold this ceremony. A rite of passage. It makes sure I can't have that." She had told him the story so many times, in so many different ways. It wasn't easy to repeat herself at first, but the more often she spoke about it, the more it felt like a story that she wasn't even a part of.

"I see. Well, there are other options."

Natalia laid her head down again. Absently, she pulled at a loose thread in the shirt James wore. "Like what?"

"Adoption. Or we could just run away from Hydra and kidnap one of the little ones from the Red Room. We'd be a family of assassins."

"Cute. But not only is that a luxury we can't afford, Hydra and the Red Room would find us, no matter where we go." 

"Pity."

"Is that what you think about, James?" she asked, lifting her head again.

"What?"

"A family. You and me, being a family."

"Sometimes," he admitted, "when I'm away from Hydra. During missions. When you're asleep beside me. Often, actually. I know we could never, but it's a nice dream."

"One day . . . one day we'll be able to do what we want. We'll be able to be just that, be a family."

"If I asked you to marry me, would you?"

"Right now?"

"Mhm."

"Well, I know I'm supposed to say yes, but now isn't really a good time."

James frowned. "What?"

"You see, we were supposed to catch our target before he caught the five a.m. train. It's five-thirty."

"SHIT!"

Natalia laughed as she rolled off the single bed they'd been sharing. "But one day, I will."

"You're taking the fall if we fail this mission," James snapped, reattaching his weapons.

Natalia only smiled as she braided her red curls. "As if you would ever let me do something so noble, Soldier."

"Shut up, grab your gun, and _move_!" James pushed Natalia out of the door. "If we fail, I won't ever ask you."

Needless to say, they didn't fail.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (crying) i just love them so much


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve threatens to shoot himself in the knee  
> Everyone helps fool drunk Tony (though it doesn't last very long)   
> Drunk Tony curses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I also don't speak Russian, so yeah

Bucky woke up with a start. Normally, that wouldn't wake Natasha, but seeing as he was holding on to her, he'd jolted her awake.

Steve had never been more surprised to be faced with the barrel of a gun.

"Where were you even hiding that?" Steve asked as Natasha set the weapon down on the short dresser.

"What the hell are you sneaking in here for?" Bucky asked, pulling his arm from under Natasha and sitting up.

"I came to ask you just when you were planning on letting me know you're all fixed up."

"Right, about that . . . who told you, again?"

"Was it the kid?" Natasha asked.

"I can't believe you two threatened Peter's internet connection."

"I can't believe he felt threatened by us when he has two geniuses that adore him," Natasha grumbled, standing up and stretching as a yawn escaped her.

"You never answered my question," Bucky told Steve.

"I did."

"I didn't ask what you were doing _in Wakanda_. I asked what you were doing _in_ _our bedroom_."

" _Our_ bedroom?" Steve echoed as Natasha walked past him to grab the shawl hanging over the back of the chair. "First of all, this whole thing is one room."

"Second of all?" Bucky prompted after a few seconds of silence.

Natasha grinned as she walked over to Bucky. "You stunned him, Soldier," she said, tying the blue material over his left shoulder.

"And here I thought that was _your_ forté," Bucky told her, tilting his head back and smiling.

"I have _never_ ," Steve said, staring at Natasha, "in all the time I've known you, _ever_ seen such a soft look on your face."

Natasha leaned against Bucky and gave Steve a smile. "Well, we've discovered that the best way to not be constantly annoyed is to simply avoid _everyone_."

"Except the royal family and on occasion, Parker."

"Except them," Natasha amended, nodding.

Steve sighed and dragged his hand over his face. "This is so strange," he whispered, mainly to himself.

"What, do you want us to visit you?" Bucky asked.

"Now and then would be nice, yeah. Tony's got the whole place cloaked and shielded. It's incredible, actually. Pepper hates it, but she's tolerating it and us. You'll love her, Buck, she's got her head screwed on properly."

"I feel like that's a not-so-subtle jab at me," Natasha said with a frown, "but I'm going to let it slide because Barnes likes you."

"Screw it," Bucky told her with a grin, "let's shoot Steve in the knee."

While Natasha smiled in amusement, Steve's jaw dropped. He shook his head. "Look, we squeezed it out of Peter that you're both fine now. Come home?"

Natasha shrugged. "Steve . . . this feels like home to me. It hasn't been that long, but I've gotten used to being here. The city is a thrilling adventure, can you believe it? Shuri keeps getting Barnes and I to test out equipment she's always improvising. Peter swings in every odd weekend and I get to sit and talk to him about what the Avengers were like back when there were just six of us. Can you tell me without a shadow of doubt that you ever expected me to develop the baking skills of a professional chef?"

Bucky nodded earnestly. "They bake things from heaven."

"I bake ridiculous-shaped cakes and biscuits with a goddamn _queen_. The compound, wherever it is, is your home but this?" Steve noticed the way she leaned closer to Bucky, tightening her hold on him ever so slightly, "this is _my_ home."

Steve sighed. "All right. All right, you can stay here without me bothering you to leave. But what would you say to a visit, hmm?"

"A visit can't hurt," Bucky murmured.

Natasha nodded slowly. "Okay, a few days. A few days and then we come back here. You know, you're not meant to have much contact with us. All of you are wanted. T'Challa gets off on being the sovereign ruler of a country in Africa. The rest of you . . . you're walking on thin ice visiting us."

"But you love the thrill," Bucky pointed out.

Natasha sighed. "I hate that you know me. I'm going to get something to wear from Shuri."

* * *

Natasha somehow managed to get something to wear from Ramonda instead. She wasn't sure how that happened. Shuri had excitedly presented Bucky with a Vibranium arm that she called a prototype and everyone else called a finished item. To thank her, it was decided that she would leave with them and return when her brother came to fetch Natasha and Bucky.

"Nat!" Peter cried excitedly when Natasha exited the jet after Steve, "you came!"

Natasha smiled as Peter hugged her.

"You look really nice in red."

"Thank you. Hey, guess who we brought?"

"Bucky?" Peter asked, glancing behind Natasha.

Natasha knocked the back of Peter's head.

(To this day, every time she did it to someone, she let out a soft, "Damn you, Laura.")

"Who _Bucky and I_ brought," Natasha amended.

"Parker, your country disappoints me. Where are all the trees?"

"MR STARK! MR STARK, SHURI CAME TO VISIT!"

Natasha laughed as Peter grabbed Shuri's wrist and dragged her across the compound to a very tired-looking Tony Stark.

"I suppose it's about time I did something around people my a--"

Natasha turned to Bucky, who had stopped in the middle of his sentence.

"Forget I said that."

She smiled. "Steve's here. You know, I'm only five years older than you."

" _Biologically_ ," Bucky grumbled, following her further into the compound.

"I'd rather we focus on biology, because if you want to follow the calender, this is paedophilic."

Bucky threw her a frown. "You had to make it weird."

Natasha smiled. "It's all part of my charm, Soldier."

* * *

"I'm going to kill him," Natasha said.

"It's your fault you made it weird, Widow. I personally think it's a _beautiful_ gift."

Natasha shot Bucky a glare. "You just want to get on Tony's good side so you can ask him about the stupid hovering car you're always thinking about."

"Guilty as charged," Bucky said, jumping onto the soft mattress, sending flower petals flying all over the room.

"Is it nasty that I wish I had a flower allergy so I could really make him feel like shit?"

"Yes, because we're trying to be good people. No, because I love you most when you're wicked."

Natasha rolled her eyes, but she was smiling at her reflection as she removed the jewellery Ramonda had told her how beautiful she had looked in. "I hate you."

Bucky slid off the bed and walked up to her, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her shoulder. "You couldn't if you tried, _rodnaya_."

The earring fell from Natasha's hand. She stared in the mirror, watching Bucky rest his head on her shoulder, a faint smile on his face, eyes closed.

"Where did you learn that?" she whispered.

Bucky shrugged. "I'm fluent in many languages, Widow."

"Do you know what it means?"

"Literally? Native, or something, right? But like most foreign languages, it has an English equivalent. My dear, darling, sweetheart --"

"Not what it translates to or what the English equivalent is," Natasha said, turning around and forcing Bucky to lift his head, "what it _means_."

Bucky stared at her for a moment. "Yes. I know what it means. And I _mean it_ , Natalia."

Natasha stared at him.

"I've been thinking these past few weeks. How many Hydra agents did you kill three years ago? Also, the robot uprising or whatever that was two years ago. Your killstreak is much higher than mine, so I suppose I shouldn't have taken your gun when we went after Zemo. You win."

"Soldier. . ."

"I don't know if you're still as sentimental as you were twenty or so years ago, but something cropped up recently. I assume we have Shuri to thank for it, although I don't know how or when she got into a Hydra base."

"What. . .?"

"Come on, Widow, don't tell me you forgot."

Natasha swatted Bucky's hand away when he moved to poke her forehead. "I'm not sentimental, Soldier."

"Fine, but I am. You had these with you when you joined the Winter Soldiers. You lost them on your first mission with the Soldiers. I found them on a mission years after you escaped. I hid them away and forgot about them when Hydra put me back under."

From a small box, Bucky pulled out a chain, from which two gold bands hung. "You never said who they belonged to, but I have a pretty good idea."

"Soldier, are you . . . are you actually going to go through with a lazy morning in 1998?"

"Why not?" Bucky dropped the rings back into the box and set it down on the table behind Natasha. "There's no Hydra, no Red Room. Just you and me, in our own little bubble. There is a lot I want to say, a lot that I _should_ , but I can't help the feeling that nothing I say could ever begin to explain what I want to convey. Words . . . they won't do it justice. You know how much I love you, but I'll tell you anyway. I love you more there are stars in the sky. I have loved you longer than I've been alive. I love you in ways that I can't even begin to explain. I loved you when you were a merciless killer, I love you now when you're just trying to live a normal life, and I'll love you no matter what happens going forward. I never want to forget you ever again. I never want to live like I don't know who you are. I would die a thousand times over, I would freeze a million times over, I would rather jump off that train than lose you again. I love _you_ , Natalia Alianovna Romanova, the little dancer that fought her way into my heart and my mind, the Black Widow, Natasha Romanoff, and whoever else walks around with these red curls and those green eyes, I _love_ you."

"Soldier --"

"I've said so much and I've barely scratched the surface. If you stay with me forever, maybe I'll manage to find a way to say everything. Marry me?"

Natasha ignored the tears that fell from her eyes as she gave Bucky her left hand. "Don't ask stupid questions, Soldier," she whispered.

The boyish grin that spread across Bucky's face made him look years younger than his body was, and Natasha couldn't help but laugh. "Where did you get this?" she asked, studying the solitaire ring Bucky had slipped onto her finger.

"Your adoptive mother-in-law. Her majesty wishes for her daughters-in-law to have only the best. You should see the set she gave T'Challa for Nakia's birthday."

"Are you going to stop rambling or am I going to have to shut you up myself?"

Bucky grinned. "I think I'll take the la--"

He had barely got the sentence out of his mouth before Natasha was kissing him. He stumbled a few steps before regaining his balance and circling his arms around Natasha.

Of course, there's never much peace in a compound full of Avengers -- especially not when one can glide through walls.

"Vision, get _out_!" Natasha cried, throwing a shirt at the android.

"I merely came to warn you."

"About?" Bucky asked, pulling Natasha closer.

"Captain Rogers and Mr Stark have already spread word of the joyous engagement, while Princess Shuri and Mr Parker refuse to stop celebrating the formation of the, err . . . the new Soviet Union."

"I'm _really_ going to kill him," Natasha told Bucky.

"Let's go. I've never seen Steve at a party before."

"I'm pretty sure that's a lie, but I'll let it slide."

Bucky never let go of Natasha the entire evening.

* * *

"Wait wait wait," Tony slurred, "I dare Rogers to . . . kiss Vision!" Then he fell over backwards, laughing at himself.

Steve glanced around at the group; everyone nodded.

"Oh my God!" Natasha cried from Bucky's lap, "I can't believe you went through with it!"

"He said kiss, not make out!" Bucky cried, shock plastered on his face.

"Come on, man," Sam joined in, "you said I'd be the first dude you kissed!"

Tony sat up sharply. "What! Did he really? I missed it! Friday, did you see anything?"

"Captain Rogers kissed Vision, boss."

"I am _insulted_ ," Wanda said, "you looked like you enjoyed that, Vis."

"I can neither confirm nor deny," the android stated.

"Stop fucking with me," Tony mumbled.

"Steve doesn't like that kind of language," Natasha reminded him.

"You know what, Romanoff --"

Natasha smiled sweetly at Steve. Bucky threw his best friend a warning yet playful glare. Steve rolled his eyes. "I can't deal with all this lovey-dovey mush from two highly skilled assassins. If they don't start behaving normally again, I'm going to shoot myself in the knee."

Natasha's jaw dropped. "Parker put you up to that, didn't he?"

Steve glanced at the couches, where Peter and Shuri were each sprawled on their own sofa, covered in blankets Tony had gone to fetch himself. 

"He was . . . a contributing factor. So, when's the wedding?"

"There won't be one," Bucky said, burying his face in Natasha's shoulder, "we're too old for all that."

"You can't _not_ have a wedding," Rhodey said, "that's like asking Tony to take off his suit."

"You think the suit is all I am?" Tony asked, "let's go a few rounds."

"You've had too many rounds of _alcohol_ ," Natasha said, "and James is right, there won't be a big celebration. First of all, it would draw attention. Second, I don't . . . want it?"

"How can you not want it?" Wanda asked, frowning slightly, "every girl wants to be a bride someday, even if it's just playing dress up without a wedding to go with it."

"Yeah . . . big white dresses aren't really my thing."

"Then don't wear white," Vision suggested, as if it were that simple.

"Vis, part of being a bride is wearing a white dress."

Vision shrugged. "Well, when in Wakanda. . ."

"Now, that's an idea," Bucky said, nudging Natasha's shoulder with his head. "What do you think?"

"I'd personally love to visit Wakanda," Sam said.

"As would I," Wanda added.

Natasha looked around at the Avengers. She glanced back at Bucky, who gave her a small nod. "Fine!" she sighed, glancing at the ceiling, "there will be a wedding."

"Maid of honour, called it!"

"I thought you were asleep," Tony mumbled at Shuri.

"And I thought you were sober."

"Touché, princess."

"It's settled then," Shuri said, "while you lot were arguing, I called my brother and asked him to speak to my mother. I hope you are prepared for spontaneity."

Natasha's jaw dropped. "I take it back. I take it all back. Wait another twenty-five years. I mean it! Stop laughing! James!"

No one took her seriously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i cant write weddings for shit pls dont expect it in the next chapter im sorry


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's canon mother ramonda adopted bucky

"That was . . . that was something."

Bucky smiled. "I can't believe you physically fought Wanda, but you let Shuri and her mother talk you into this dress."

"They guilt-tripped me. They said I had to do something American for your sake. I have a weakness when it comes to those puppy-dog eyes."

Bucky pulled Natasha closer. "It suits you."

Natasha smiled as she rested her head on Bucky's shoulder. "I didn't know you still danced."

"There's a lot you don't know about me, my little ballerina."

"Educate me, then."

Bucky opened his mouth, but he never got the chance to respond.

"Okay, break it up, we want a dance with the bride too."

Grudgingly, Bucky handed Natasha to Steve. He stood and watched her laugh and smile for a few seconds before Shuri tapped his arm. "Would you dance with a princess?"

Bucky bowed to her. "Who could say no to a royal genius?"

Shuri smiled. "Mother is happy to see you happy," she commented as they danced, "she really thinks of you as one of her children."

"Interesting. I always thought she considered Nat more her child than me."

Shuri laughed. "She likes Nat a lot, true, but you . . . there's something about you, Sergeant Barnes. How did you like the ceremony? Okoye and Nakia planned it out."

Bucky raised his eyebrows and glanced at the wild mask adorning one wall.

"Well, M'Baku had a hand in the decoration. . ."

"I thought as much," Bucky said with a grin, "it looks amazing. Tell Nakia I said she has an eye for detail."

"Tell her yourself," Nakia said as she approached.

"I'm going to make fun of Peter's dancing," Shuri said, leaving Nakia to take her place. She was going to try to teach Peter how to dance with Liz Allen at his homecoming dance in September (Peter said that his Aunt May claimed Peter was a disaster dancer). That didn't mean she wasn't serious about making fun of him. After all, what are friends for? She was sure his best friend Ned would agree and join her. Peter sure seemed to talk a _lot_ about Ned.

Across the hall, Steve let Tony cut in. Steve offered Pepper a dance when he noticed her standing and watching with Rhodey.

"So, this what a happy Romanoff looks like. Ah, sorry, a happy _Barnes_."

"Shut up."

Tony grinned. "You couldn't even say that without smiling," he teased. "I'm really happy for you, Natasha. You deserve this."

She shook her head. "I don't know about that. But I do know that I'm going to grab it with both hands and hold tight."

"That's good enough. I'm glad you found some sense of peace out here. The compound's nice, I won't deny it, but there's a strange air of . . . freedom out in the wilds here in Wakanda. Almost like there's no one else out there. No need to keep looking over your shoulder, checking back every few steps, worrying about everyone you can't see."

"It's why I want to stay here with James, why we didn't tell anyone that Shuri was done fixing him up. Here, I can forget that the Black Widow was an assassin for the highest bidder. Wakanda is a beautiful haven, and I'll be forever thankful that I got to spend time in it."

"Speaking of beautiful things, you look stunning in your dress. I'm glad you let someone talk you into the white dress after all. It makes you look . . . younger. Innocent, even." Tony smiled, and Natasha knew he was genuine. "It gives you an air of purity."

But that didn't mean she wasn't going to tease him. "Right, because _you_ know all about purity."

"Darling, I'm so pure, I wear white suits to a black tie event."

"Sure."

"It's true." They fell silent for a few seconds. "Look at you, straying away from the Avengers -- no, straying away from the fight. You'll never truly leave the Avengers, but I feel like you'll stay out of the fight if you can. You've grown past the Black Widow." Tony gave her a lopsided grin. "You're a family woman now."

Natasha laughed. "I'm not even sure what that means. I've been a fighter my whole life. Yeah, I love Wakanda and I love James and I love that we have peace here, but if there's a fight that needs to be fought . . . you know I'll be there."

Tony frowned. "What if you had to abandon family to fight?"

"I wouldn't be abandoning family, though. The Avengers _is_ my family. James would fight beside me -- and Steve, for that matter. T'Challa will protect his Wakanda if he needs to fight. Shuri won't let herself be sidelined, she'll be in the frontlines. Parker . . . well, he just wants to help out. I wouldn't abandon anyone, because I'd be fighting alongside everyone."

"Whatever. Long as you're _happy_ , nothing else matters."

Natasha smiled. She kissed Tony's cheek. Before she pulled away, she whispered in his ear, "Marry her _now_."

Tony glanced around the hall, then followed Natasha's gaze. Bucky and Steve swapped partners, and while Steve danced with Nakia, Bucky found himself dancing with Pepper. "I plan to. How did we get so lucky, Agent Romanoff?"

Natasha shrugged. "Maybe we've done something commendable."

"Unlikely. You and I are both Nick Fury's biggest disaster prodigies."

"Then maybe we _will_ do something great."

"Maybe . . . well, touching as all this is, I'm going to need you to accept my sincere apologies."

Natasha frowned. "Why? What for?"

"I developed an anti-serum to temporarily -- and only mildly -- counter the effects of Steve's supersoldier serum. It doesn't affect his health or his physique. What it does affect, is his inability to get drunk. I may have given him a shot without thinking and I saw him eyeing the drinks fountain earlier. The reason I'm apologising is because he's got his hands on a microphone."

"Tony!"

"Attention everyone," Steve called, swaying on his feet as Bucky made his way to Natasha. Tony stepped back and joined Pepper as Steve tried not to faceplant the microphone. "I just wanna say that I'm very happy because my two favourite killers have somehow managed to overcome their violent tendencies and are now --" Steve hiccupped "-- and are now . . . what's the phrase this insane generation uses? Starting a new chapter? Or is this turning over a tree? Or is that from _my_ generation? Whatever. Hey! My best friends got married! To the Sovi--"

Natasha scowled at the billionaire that snatched the mic from Steve.

"Sorry. I forgot to hire a babysitter for the evening and I had to bring Roger's along. But," he continued, pausing to give the couple a glance, "Steve's on the right track. To the Soviet Union 2.0!"

Natasha buried her face in Bucky's shoulder. "I'm going to kill someone sometime over the next few years, I _swear_."

* * *

It had barely been a month before Ramonda sent Shuri to fetch Bucky and Natasha for dinner with her. Everything was going well and smooth until Ramonda got to what was troubling her.

"I have a teenage tech genius for a daughter whom I love with all my heart. I have a brave warrior for a son whom I have never been more proud of. Shuri is young and therefore excused."

The pair of siblings stopped beaming to frown at their mother. Ramonda continued on.

"My son disappoints me. He has the courage of a thousand men in meetings and out when he fights, but . . . Nakia gives him a run for all that bravery."

"Mother!"

Shuri hid her amused grin behind her cup. Ramonda folded her hands before her plate and leaned forward.

"You two have disappointed me as well."

Natasha and Bucky shared a glance.

"Where are my grandchildren?!"

Shuri couldn't contain it any longer. She snorted her drink and had to have help recovering. Ramonda didn't look away from the newlyweds as T'Challa helped his sister breathe once more. "I'm not getting any younger, you know."

"Er. . ."

"S-sorry?" Natasha tried.

The queen sighed. "Oh, well. Shuri, I'm counting you. I hope you find a good man someday."

Shuri tried -- she really did -- to wipe her smile away. "Yes, mother. I won't be like my useless brother."

"I came here to eat, and I am getting insulted without pause." T'Challa sighed and turned to his food.

Ramonda smiled. "I'm just teasing," she told Natasha and Bucky. "But I'm serious when I ask if you would like to stay here, close to the rest of us. I understand that you like the open space but . . . the people of Wakanda are not like the others out in the world. We are different. You might like it."

"You'll get to try out new gadgets more often," Shuri said, excited and bouncing in her seat, "and you won't have to spend your days looking after goats!"

"Just when I was getting used to it," Bucky joked.

"You'll stay?" Shuri's wide eyes twinkled.

"I don't see why not," Natasha eventually said, "although I'd prefer if I didn't get scared shirtless during dinner."

T'Challa threw Natasha a glare. "What would the Captain say if he heard that?"

Bucky quite nearly inhaled his drink.

The family spent the rest of the evening laughing with one another over emptied dishes and continuously refilled cups. Natasha had never felt more at home that she did just then, Bucky's arm around her shoulders as she leaned against him, his fingers trailing absently through her hair while they laughed at Shuri knocking her brother down with her words.

The Avengers were her family, true.

Wakanda and everyone in it had become her _home_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short, I know, but come on, I gave you like three chapters.
> 
> I MADE ME SAD. The line "Maybe we _will_ do something great" hurts me a lot but I left it in there because you should be sad too.
> 
> I am so bitter about Endgame expect to hear a lot about it hurting me.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise surprise   
> im still here

Natasha tossed and turned, unable to find sleep.

"Something wrong?" Bucky murmured sleepily.

"You were right," Natasha said, turning over to face Bucky.

"Hm?"

"You were right. I was wrong. No one's going to shoot Steve in the knee."

"Widow, what are you talking about?"

"What Ramonda said at the table today, I can't stop thinking about it."

Bucky furrowed his eyebrows. "T'Challa is afraid of nothing but Nakia?"

" _No_. About wanting her grandchildren."

"Oh . . . ohh . . . _OH_!"

"You were right and I was wrong. I want one."

"Oh!" Bucky said again, seemingly unable to make any other sound.

"Are you just going to lay there and make me feel like an idiot until daylight?"

" _No_. I'm just . . . you caught me by surprise. I wasn't expecting that. You can't blame me. I was still half-asleep."

"Sorry," Natasha murmured sheepishly.

"It's okay," Bucky said, moving closer towards the middle of the bed and pulling Natasha towards him. "Shuri wants to be an aunt, you know, maybe even more than Ramonda wants to be a grandmother. While you were playing villain with the kids a few days ago, Shuri came to make sure I'm still not going to snap back into mindless-mode, as she calls it. She was just talking, about anything. Like her mother, she complained about the fact that T'Challa is still yet to ask Nakia to marry him. It made me laugh then, how she said she would hack into adoption agency databases if she had to."

Natasha smiled and burrowed closer against Bucky. "Hm, you can ask her about that in the morning. For now, be quiet and go to sleep."

"Oh, _now_ you're tired? After you woke me up?" 

"I love you," she sang softly, closing her eyes and drifting off. Bucky kissed the top of her head before closing his eyes as well. "Love you too, Natalia."

* * *

"This is difficult with a capital D," Shuri complained as Nakia walked in.

"Guess I'll come back later."

Shuri smiled at the woman. "No, I've got time. What is it?"

"Looking for you. Okoye and I learnt how to execute a new prank, and we were planning on using your brother as a victim. I came to ask if you'd like to film it."

"Absolutely."

"Not now!" Nakia said quickly when Shuri stood up at once. "What are you doing that's so difficult?"

Shuri pointed at the couple sitting at one of her tables -- nearly on top of each other -- as they discussed something. It was a miracle Bucky hadn't fallen yet, seeing as the only arm he had was not really doing much in the way of support.

"Choosing a child is hard, because what is the criteria? What makes one a better choice than another? How do you look at an array of children and pick one out?"

Nakia frowned.

"They want to adopt a child," Shuri explained.

"Oh!"

Nakia joined them. Okoye arrived a few minutes later to find out what happened to Nakia, and she too sat down.

Shuri had never allowed so many people into her own space at once before, so when Ramonda looked in an noticed a whole group, she came to inquire and ended up sitting with them.

T'Challa looked at the number of women in the room -- and Bucky -- who all had the tendency to roast his royal behind, and walked straight past.

Okoye stood up suddenly. "What about her?" she asked, swiping an image from her bracelet to full view for everyone to see. The Wakandan women crowded around Bucky and Natasha.

"Her name is Anastasia, and she's Russian," Okoye said, "she's already six years old."

"Widow, look." Natasha read off the hologram what Bucky pointed at. "Her mother was a Red Room escapee."

"There's _no way_ that thing is still operational," Natasha said, "it should've been dead for the last twenty years."

"Anastasia wasn't her first child, though," Shuri said, also reading through the information, "she had another, died in a failed assassination of the father, an assassin himself that once worked against the KGB. Some unlisted programme."

"Are her parents still alive?" Ramonda asked.

"Body of the father discovered in a lake weeks before her birth," Nakia said, "mother died weeks after. It's just the little girl."

"What do you think?" Bucky asked Natasha, who seemed captivated by the photo of a young girl with brown curls and light eyes.

"I can fix a meeting," Shuri said, "we will be able to get you there and back without the rest of the world laying eyes on you."

Natasha gave Shuri a nod before turning back to the photo in front of her. Right at the top was the child's full name.

Anastasia Nikitichna Volkova.

* * *

 

**_~~ 1993 ~~_ **

* * *

"Widow, what are you doing?"

Natalia looked up at the Winter Soldier that stood behind her. "There was a time in my life when I thought I had no place in the world. Joining the Winter Soldiers, despite losing the others to the serum, it makes me question that."

The Winter Soldier squinted at the bright snow around them. "And you couldn't do that _inside_ the facility?"

Natalia laughed. "No one said you had to join me."

"Karpov sent me to make sure you didn't jump off the building or something."

Natalia peered over her knees at the drop. "I'd probably survive that without the serum running in my veins. But he shouldn't worry. I'm not going to end in suicide. Perhaps I'll go down in battle, fighting until the end. I'd accept my death if it meant something."

"Something like what?" he asked, sitting down beside her.

"I don't know. The world is changing, Soldier. The people we fight for could become the people we fight against. I don't know. When I die, I want it to be on my own terms. I want to die knowing that whatever I've done in my life, it's led up to the moment where I can be free, satisfied with my end. I don't want to die a simple or meaningless death."

"Does death by old age not form part of that list?"

"Old age isn't something a KGB Hydra agent can think about. Our line of work is dangerous and can be fatal. I'd be surprised if I even _made it_ to sixty."

"According to the calendar, I'm seventy-six."

"And I'm thirty. But we're both twenty-eight. Time is relative."

"What else are you questioning?" he asked instead.

Natalia thought for a moment. "If the Red Room was wrong about the girls having a place in the world, what else were they wrong about?"

"What else did they tell you?"

"Family is a weakness. When you graduate, they make sure you can't have one."

The Winter Soldier shrugged. "Maybe they're right about that one. We wouldn't know. If I had a family, I sure as hell can't remember it."

Natalia frowned. "Love is for children," she quoted, "it's what they taught us all the time. But even as a child, I never knew love. What if everything is wrong? What if every single thing I know is wrong? What then?"

"Can you remember any other way?" he asked.

"No," she admitted.

"Then even if it is wrong, what can you do?"

* * *

 

**_~~ 2017 ~~_ **

* * *

"Are they back already?" Shuri asked, glancing up at the sky.

"Looks like," Ramonda murmured, standing beside Shuri. "I wonder what happened."

"Maybe the matron was a witch."

"Or," Ramonda said as the ramp descended and its passengers exited, "things went well. Stop being so pessimistic."

The young child that walked with the four adults looked around in awe. Natasha smiled when the child tugged Okoye's arm and pointed at the other Dora Milaje. Okoye gave her a nod. Shuri's heart just about burst with joy when the child gave the Dora Milaje the Wakanda salute. Natasha took her hand and guided her to Ramonda.

"This is Anastasia Volkova, or as we've decided to call --"

"My name is Anya," the child said, looking up at the queen, "Anya Barnes, and this is Mamma."

"Welcome to Wakanda, Anya," Shuri said, crouching in front of her, "you're going to love it here."

Anya looked up at Natasha.

"Shuri," Natasha said.

Anya leaned towards Shuri and whispered, "Is your brother sometimes a cat?"

"Oh, I like her a lot," Shuri said.

"Mamma says you build things."

"I do. Would you like to come and see?"

Anya glanced first at Natasha, then at Bucky. Both gave her an encouraging nod. She let go of Natasha's hand to take Shuri's.

"That was quick," Ramonda said, "I expected it to take days or even weeks for her to grow accustomed to her new life."

"You should have seen her at the orphanage," T'Challa said, "she took one look at them and wanted to leave with them. We would have come back hours ago if not for the paperwork."

"I wonder what it is about you," Ramonda murmured. "No matter, at least _one_ of my sons are married and have a child."

"Moth- _th_ _er_!"

Ramonda noticed the smile on the war general's face. "Okoye, did something particularly good happen?"

"Nothing particular, my queen. I just like the child a lot. She's fascinated with my uniform, and for some reason, my head."

"Maybe she's never seen a bald woman before."

Okoye shot T'Challa a glare. "If it were not for the laws of this land. . ."

"Come now, you started it."

"Come," Ramonda said, gesturing to the doors, "it's time for lunch. I expect the child is hungry?"

Anya settled in at once. In a matter of days, not a single person who met her could have imagined life without her around. It had been an understatement when Okoye claimed that Anya was fascinated with Wakanda. Anya was more than that, and a few days with Shuri proved that although she might not be a genius prodigy, she was sharp and remembered what she was told.

Natasha no longer played villain with the children of Wakanda, not when they had someone their size who was thrilled to run around in the odd masks and 'swear vengeance' on the others. They'd asked Anya if she wanted someone else to wear the mask once, and she refused to let go of it. She was happy, they were happy, and they played together as if they had all been born into the same house.

Natasha walked into the room to find Anya fiddling with something, bits and pieces strewn around her on the floor as she seemed to fight with the one in her hand. "What are you playing with, Anya?"

"Shuri gave it to me. She said it's a puzzle. I can't figure it out."

Natasha sat on the floor in front of Anya. "How long have you been playing with it?"

Anya shrugged. "I got it after breakfast."

"How do you solve the puzzle?"

Anya frowned as she pulled something off. "You have to open it like a present. You have to take off all the pieces, but they're stuck until you unlock it."

"And how much have you completed?"

Anya put the disc down and made a ball with her hands that was nearly twice the size of the little disc. "It was so big."

"What happens when you take off all the pieces?"

Anya shrugged, once again fixated on the disc. "Shuri said it's a surprise. She said Mamma will like it too."

"Is that so?"

"Mmhm."

Natasha watched Anya pull off a few more pieces off.

"Mamma."

"Hm?"

"Thank you for bringing me home. Sometimes, people don't get parents, and they grow up in the orphanage, and then they aren't nice, because they're sad and hurt. I didn't want to become like them."

As quickly as she had brought on the solemn air, Anya chased it away. "I finished it!"

She turned it over a few times, slightly disappointed. She tapped the centre; nothing happened. Upset, Anya gripped the two sides and tried to pull it apart. When that wouldn't work, she tried to snap the disc in half, dropping it when it folded ninety degrees and a hologram rose sharply.

Natasha and Anya watched the image form in front of them. "It's Mamma!" Anya cried, noticing Natasha's face first. "And Daddy! And me!"

Natasha suddenly remembered Shuri shouting "Family portrait!" when she saw Natasha pick Anya up so the child could speak to Bucky. She never did show the photo to Natasha. Anya giggled to herself as she reached for the disc and pushed it back into a perfect circle, getting rid of the hologram.

"Did Mamma like it?"

Natasha nodded. "I did. I loved it . . . Anya?"

"Hm?" Anya fiddled with the disc, wondering if she could make it do something else.

"Mamma loves you very much."

Anya smiled. "I know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so I managed to get my hands on a half-baked Endgame transcript. To celebrate the fact that I can continue writing the story, I've decided to post. 
> 
> Things are gonna get real slow real soon (not in the story, in real life in a slow gremlin)
> 
> Also, I wrote this sometime before Endgame and rereading the 1993 piece where Natasha talks about her end brought legit tears to my eyes if any of u suffer the same I guess I'm a little sorry
> 
> PETER IS RETURNING NEXT CHAPTER Y'ALL


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and Shuri are awesome older siblings

"Who's Peter?" Anya asked Shuri a few weeks later.

"He's a naughty boy that runs away from home to visit Wakanda."

Anya frowned. "Wakanda is very nice. I would run away to visit Wakanda too."

Shuri smiled. "Well, Peter is coming to visit today. I think you'll like him."

"What's that?" Anya asked, now more interested in Shuri's gadgets.

"An upgrade for your mother. They're called electroshock bracelets."

Anya repeated the phrase under her breath a few times. "Can they shoot lightning?"

"That is now a new goal. No, they can't. But they give little shocks and can sometimes temporarily paralyze a person."

"Like . . . like a stun gun!"

Shuri nodded slowly. "Yes, something like that. You're a clever little wolf, aren't you?"

"I'm not a wolf," Anya laughed, "I'm a person!"

"True, but that's what your birth name means."

"Oh."

"Do you know what your first name means?"

Anya shook her head.

"Ressurection. Do you know what _that_ means?"

Anya shook her head again.

"Born again, to come back to life."

"That's so cool. Who do you think I was? Before me, now."

Shuri laughed. "I'm not so sure, but you do seem to embody your mother. I think that she would've been a lot like you when she was this young."

"I remind you of Mamma?"

"Yes," Shuri said, to keep from having to explain that she didn't actually know Natasha all that long. "You remind me of your mother."

Anya smiled.

"Although, oddly enough, you _look_ like your father. I guess you really were meant to be adopted by your parents, huh?"

Anya laughed as Shuri tapped her on the nose. "I'm glad they adopted me."

"So am I, little wolf."

"Who's a little wolf?" Peter asked as he walked in. He stopped short when he saw Anya playing with Shuri's things. "And who's this little genius-in-training?"

Anya looked at Shuri, who nodded her head to Peter and mouthed his name. Anya slid off the chair and walked to Peter. She stood in front of him and tilted her head backwards. "My name is Anya Barnes. I'm Shuri's appendage."

Peter coughed slightly, hiding a grin behind his fist.

" _Apprentice_ ," Shuri corrected, smiling, "she's got a big project, right, little wolf?"

Anya nodded and smiled up at Shuri.

"Barnes," Peter echoed, looking at Shuri, "as in. . .?"

Shuri nodded. Peter knelt down in front of Anya. "It's nice to meet you, Anya Barnes. My name's Peter Parker. I'm Shuri's friend."

Anya smiled. "You're cute. You have a small face."

Now it was Shuri who coughed slightly.

"Er, thanks?"

"My dad has a cute face, too. Mamma has a very pretty face. _Umkhulu_ has a pretty face also. . ." And Anya walked back to her chair, mumbling about the faces of people she knew.

Peter sat down across Shuri while Anya continued playing around. "So, uh, how long as it been since I was last here?"

"A few months at best, Parker. They adopted her a while back. They haven't told anyone because they want to give them heart attacks when they surprise visit on Christmas, so you keep your big fat mouth shut, okay?"

"My lips are sealed," Peter said, giving Anya a smile.

An hour later, Anya looked up from her 'project' to a sight she found rather strange.

". . . and then, as if that wasn't bad enough, _Flash_ had to show up and --"

"Peter's on the wall!"

Peter looked down at the floor only to realise that it was, in fact, the wall. Shuri looked where Anya stared and laughed. "He does that sometimes," Shuri said.

Anya watched in awe as Peter shot a web at the ceiling -- which was impressively high -- and used it to swing back to the floor. "Wow . . . you're a superhero! Like Mamma!"

"I guess, kind of. I don't really do big things like they do. I'm . . . more like a friendly neighbourhood Spiderman."

"Is that your superhero name? Like Mamma's is Black Widow, and Daddy's was the Winter Soldier, but Umkhulu calls him a White Wolf. Hey, like me!"

Shuri smiled at Anya's excitement. Peter nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, it is. So, can I call you little wolf too?"

Anya pursed her lips as she thought about it. "Then I can call you Spider-brother!"

"If that's what you want," Peter said with a laugh. "What are you building over there, little wolf?"

Both Shuri and Peter walked to the table. Proudly, Anya held up T'Challa's old Black Panther helmet.

To Peter, it still looked the same. Shuri examined it.

"Anya, did you reprogram the helmet to respond to your fingerprint alone?"

Anya smiled at Shuri. "I don't know what that means."

"She means, did you play around with this so that only you can make it work?"

Anya looked between the teenagers' faces. "Did I do something wrong?" she asked in a small voice.

"No!" they both cried. Shuri set the helmet on the table.

"We just think you're incredible! For someone so young, you shouldn't have been able to do something so . . . so complex, but you did!"

Anya's smile returned. Peter picked her up and gave her a spin. "You're officially one of us! A genius!"

Anya laughed as Peter dropped her so that he was balancing her on his hip. "What you did was really clever, little wolf. You'd make a great superhero."

"My superhero name would be little wolf!"

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Shuri said, taking Anya from Peter and putting her back in her chair. "But Peter's right, you really are a clever little wolf."

Bucky and Natasha watched in silence as their daughter bonded with both Peter and Shuri. Natasha's mind drifted to the evening of her wedding. She smiled as she remembered Tony asking how they had gotten so lucky.

Bucky smiled as he laced his fingers with Natasha's, rubbing his thumb over the gold band she wore. "So, this is as normal as it gets, huh?"

Natasha nodded. "I'm not complaining. It's better than what I thought I was going to get four or five years ago. Although, if I see my daughter running around behind Parker in a suit of some kind, I can't promise to control my actions."

Peter turned around and smiled at Natasha. Knowing he could probably hear her, Natasha continued. "Spider to spider, that's a promise."

She smiled and waved back.

"You are so wicked," Bucky told Natasha, smiling at her.

"Mm, but we both know you love me best when I am."

"Unfortunately."

Natasha kissed his cheek and turned to leave, tugging him behind her. "Come on, I'd trust Parker and Shuri with my life. She's safe."

"Oh, it's not _Anya_ I'm worried about. It's the other two." Bucky followed Natasha out of the lab.

"Everything is fine, Soldier. Don't you think this is happily ever after? Feels like happily ever after to me."

"You are _insane_ \-- and I love you even with your insanity, don't kill me."

"Like I would ever take Anya's father from her."

"Oh, so she's the only reason you won't kill me?"

"Well, I suppose you could let me shoot Steve in the knee?"

Bucky wrapped his arm around Natasha and pulled her close so that they were nearly walking on top of each other. He kissed her cheek from behind.

"I love you, _so much_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> short, I know, but guess what's coming soon-ish?
> 
> That's right, INFINITY WAR
> 
> does Anya survive the snap?
> 
> how will Nat deal with Bucky (and Anya maybe) being faded into nothingness??
> 
> if baby Anya survives, how is she going to handle not having Shuri and Peter to be there for her???
> 
> what about Ramonda, who's gonna lose her two sons and daughter????
> 
> and most importantly, since I essentially told Civil War to piss off, is the snap even gonna happen?????
> 
> Stay alert, sweethearts, the worst is yet to come **insert evil laughter


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before we get into this, I just want to remind you all that I suck at action scenes and have thus far done my level best to avoid them. 
> 
> (My motto is if you can't write it, don't. Rather practice until you can. And I can't write them at this stage.) 
> 
> This now means that there will be none of the action scenes from Infinity War (and probably endgame too in later chapters)

Natasha should have known better than to open her mouth. The time that went by was rather nice, but September brought with it a few . . . disasters.

First, there was Peter who called to say he wouldn't be making a visit anytime soon, seeing as he'd gotten his suit taken by Tony. Then, when Shuri couldn't wait any longer and called to ask how the homecoming dance went, they found out Peter had come within an inch of his life. He claimed to be fine, especially when Shuri said she would leave Wakanda to see how he was doing. On the other hand, he said he'd had fun in Washington and that he'd managed almost half a dance with Liz Allen.

After that little scare, Natasha was very upset to be woken by the king of Wakanda knocking at her bedroom door.

"Go and tell him to jump off a cliff," Natasha grumbled, further curling around the little girl that slept in her arms.

"You tell him," Bucky grumbled, moving closer to the warmth Natasha's body provided.

When T'Challa knocked again, Bucky sighed and went to open the door.

"We have a problem."

* * *

"Stay with _Umkhulu_ ," Natasha told Anya firmly, glancing up at Ramonda, "do you understand me, angel?"

Anya nodded, holding tight to the disc Shuri had given her so long ago. "Where's Mamma going?"

"Mamma's going to go and save the world, babygirl."

"Will Mamma come back?"

"Mamma will try her hardest."

Anya's lip trembled. "What if Mamma doesn't come back?"

Natasha thought about promising Anya that she would return, but the thought crossed her mind that she just might not. Natasha gave her daughter a hug and kissed her forehead. "Then remember that Mamma has always loved you and will always love you. If I don't come back, it's because I was saving you. Mamma would _never_ leave you if she could help it."

Anya tried to blink tears out of her eyes. Natasha smiled. "Cry, angel, it's okay. Don't let anyone tell you crying is bad. It's okay to cry, angel."

Anya whimpered. "I don't want Mamma and Daddy to go. I -- I don't --"

"I know, angel," Natasha said, pulling Anya into a tight hug.

"Please come back," the seven-year-old child whispered.

"Mamma will try her hardest," Natasha promised. Then she stood up and walked away, leaving her daughter with the queen.

* * *

"Upgrade?" Bucky asked, taking in the suit Natasha donned. 

"Infused with Vibranium. You know, there's something I always wanted to ask you."

"Yeah?"

"What were you doing in the Smithsonian that day? How did you know you'd find information on yourself there?"

"I didn't. I had no idea who you were, where I'd seen you, or what you even did. But I recognised Steve when I saw Captain America all over the place. I went to the Smithsonian because I felt like I knew Steve. I never expected to learn that I _knew_ Steve."

"Hydra was a _bitch_ ," Natasha said after a second.

"I won't deny that, but Hydra gave me you. It's the least they could've done after screwing me up so bad."

Natasha smiled as she pulled the last strap on her vest tight. "Is that a new arm?"

Bucky glanced at the onyx metal. "Shuri never stops upgrading. You know that."

"That's cute," Natasha said with a smile, pointing to his left hand.

Bucky glanced at the gold band. "Yeah, she actually designed it with a groove so that the ring fits and there's no chance it'll fall off. She used it as an excuse to upgrade the arm."

Natasha walked over and flicked Bucky's hair out of his face. "I think it's a sweet gesture. So, ready to jump into the frontlines again?"

Bucky shrugged. "Not too keen on it. What I am waiting for, is when we win the damn thing. Everyone ought to be here, so we might as well introduce Anya to them all."

"That . . . is actually a good idea. Why wait until Christmas?"

"Exactly. You look nice with your hair braided. You should do it more often."

"You should stop stalling. I hear we get to kick alien ass this time. This should be fun."

"Aliens. Oh, joy. Stark's going to make a joke about it, I can feel it. He's going to ask us if we're related to them."

"Oh, shut up!" Natasha laughed.

"If you are done flirting," Okoye said, " _Kumkani_ is waiting."

Natasha and Bucky walked outside to hear T'Challa explaining how much of an army Steve would have backing him up. Natasha looked around for the billionaire so she could shut him up before he even inhaled, but while she didn't find Tony, she found someone else.

"Bruce."

"Natasha? You look -- you look great. What happened to you? You look different. Good different."

Natasha waved her hand casually. "Oh, you know, something here, something there, got married somewhere along the way, it's been fun."

Bruce's eyes nearly popped out of his head. "You got _married_? To _who_? Steve? Sam? Wait, it wasn't _Tony_ , was it?"

Natasha shook her head. "I would rather shoot Steve in the knee. No, it wasn't one of them."

Bucky was enjoying watching Bruce's confusion grow, and he knew Natasha was enjoying it as well. Leaving her to have her fun, Bucky decided to greet his best friend.

"Look, Okoye. There's your Starbucks."

" _Kumkani_ , if it were not for the laws of this land. . ." Okoye turned to Wanda, who supported and injured vision with help from Rhodey. "Come with me. Shuri is waiting."

"Sup, feather-face," Bucky told Sam.

The latter nodded. "Nice to see you too, steering-wheel-thief."

"Oh, come on, I wasn't myself, feather-face."

"Call me feather-face one more time," Sam warned.

"Oh no!" Bruce suddenly cried, "you didn't! You split Clint and Laura up?!"

Steve glanced at Natasha, who was barely holding herself together. He grabbed Bucky's arm and dragged him away from Sam before one attacked the other. "Bruce," Steve said, catching the doctor's attention.

"Yeah?"

"This is my old friend, Bucky Barnes."

Bruce glanced at Bucky's left arm. "Yeah, the guy with the metal arm, tried to kill you on orders from Hydra. Childhood best friends, right?"

Steve nodded. "Also, Nat's just messing with you."

Bruce glanced at Natasha, who nodded, snorting as she did. Bruce seemed to deflate in relief. "Oh, okay. Clever joke, that was. You were really dedicated. I mean, you even got yourself a wedding ba-- oh, wait. That's not what you meant."

Steve nodded. "That's definitely not what I meant. Anyway, like I was saying, my best friend, Bucky, who also happens to be Natasha's husband."

"Oh. Oh. OH! Oh, I got the joke!"

"What joke?" Steve asked, confused.

"Tony told me to say hi to the Soviet Union."

"I'm going to hit him," Natasha said. "Where is he anyway?"

"He's on a flying donut with Doctor Strange and Spiderman. They're in space."

"Doctor who?" Bucky echoed, while Natasha's eyes popped. "Tony took the kid to _space_?"

"He can do magic and he's guarding one of the Infinity Stones," Bruce answered Bucky.

"Wait, slow down," Natasha said, frowning. "Run us through everything. _Slowly_."

* * *

"Had this happened a year or so ago," Bucky murmured to Natasha, "I'd have just resigned myself to the fight, but I'd have gone headfirst into it. Now, with Anya, I'd really rather stay behind."

Natasha nodded. "I know, James. But hey, when the Avengers hang another trophy on the compound wall, we get to give everyone those heart attacks we were talking about."

"Can't wait to see the look on Steve's face," Bucky said with a grin, thinking about it.

"You know what I dread? Tony."

"That's a valid fear. That's a _very_ valid fear."

Natasha took a deep breath as Steve and T'Challa returned.

"Did they surrender?" Bucky asked, glancing at the enemy army.

"Not exactly," Steve said, as he found himself between Natasha and Bucky.

"Great. Let's kick some alien ass so we can all go back to bed."

* * *

One hell of an epic fighting scene later, Thanos himself arrived. The Avengers fought their hardest, the Wakandans harder than ever before. Some managed to slow the titan down, but none brought him to a stop. A surge of energy ripped through the trees and Natasha, though she knew this meant the end of Vision, heaved a sigh of relief from the under the rocks Thanos had trapped her with. They'd destroyed the stone. They might not get past the losses that had caused, but at least the rest of the world was saved.

Understandably, she was most confused when time seemed to reverse, to the point where the rocks even moved back into place, released her and all the others the mad titan had trapped.

"He got the time stone!" Bucky yelled as he fell into step beside Natasha, both sprinting in the direction they'd seen him go.

They made it into the clearing as a bright white light blinded them all.

"What did you do?!" Thor demanded, his axe driven into Thanos' chest.

The titan only raised his arm and used the space stone to escape.

"Nat. . ."

Natasha turned around to see Bucky staring at his hand. Her gun fell to the floor with Bucky as he disintegrated. "James?"

"What the hell. . ." Steve murmured.

Something occurred to Natasha as she watched T'Challa and Wanda fade away as well. She sprinted from the battlefield, all the way to the palace. Blindly, she turned corners relying on her memory alone. Not watching where she was going, she collided with the queen. Both women grabbed the arms to steady themselves and each other.

"Shuri," Ramonda choked out, panic in her eyes, "Shuri -- she -- she's gone. I don't know --" Ramonda paused, remembering that her son had left to protect Wakanda. "Where is my child?"

"Where is mine?" Natasha asked, the same panic and fear lacing every word and reflecting in her eyes.

Slowly, Ramonda shook her head. "No, they can't be . . . I can't -- we can't lose everything."

Natasha didn't even notice Ramonda's fingers digging into her arms. She'd witnessed Bucky go, and now her daughter was gone too.

And it was Anya who thought Natasha wouldn't return.

Neither knew how, but they had both sunk to the floor, sharing their grief. Ramonda cried out for her lost family, but Natasha had frozen, and she sat unable to even make a sound.

And that was how Okoye found them. Mothers who had lost children, doing the best they could to comfort one another, neither succeeding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SORRRY, OKAY?!?!?!?!?!?!
> 
> Fun fact: this is the last chapter I wrote before going to see Endgame. Expect future chapters to be riddled with things to make you sad.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter 14, a.k.a. a filler

"Nat," Okoye said softly as she approached, " _uMamakazikazi_ , Nakia prepared something for you to eat."

Neither woman got up from the seat they shared, leaning against each other.

"You must eat something. Please."

Slowly, Natasha dragged her eyes from the wall across to Okoye. "I'm going to find him," she hissed, "and if I don't get them back, I'm going to make sure he dies."

Okoye nodded. "You will need strength, Black Widow."

Nakia burst into the room. She stared at each woman in turn for a second before speaking. "Mr Rogers just called. They got Tony Stark back."

"I'll take my breakfast to go," Natasha said, standing up. Nakia's words seemed to have flipped a switch in the redhead, as she suddenly had a purpose. She no longer wore the glassy stare, nor favoured the hunched shoulders that had plagued both her and Ramonda for the last twenty-three days.

"I'll go with you," Okoye said.

Nakia opened her mouth, and Natasha and Okoye both cut her off. "Stay with Queen Mother."

Nakia nodded after a second, understanding that Ramonda needed someone by her.

"We leave within the hour," Okoye said.

Natasha was ready within half an hour.

* * *

Natasha entered the compound to find Steve holding Tony's arc reactor in his hand. "What happened?" she demanded, "where is he?"

"Resting," Rhodey said quickly, before Natasha tried to murder someone. "Bruce gave him a sedative. Space . . . it messed with him. He's gone off the rails, ranting about a suit of armour around the world."

"And maybe if we had listened to him and _helped_ him instead of letting him spiral into creating Ultron, we wouldn't be in this mess."

"Nat," Steve said, taking a step towards her, "I know you're upset --"

"I'm not upset! I'm angry! Everything went to shit because the Avengers weren't together. Tony went off to space to rescue Doctor Strange! You came to Wakanda. Maybe, if you had been there with him, if we had _all_ been there with him, we could've wrapped the purple bastard up in a day." She looked around and the faces staring back at her. "Who are you?"

"Carol Danvers. I'm the one Fury was calling with the pager. Steve said you told them to make sure it kept running. . ."

"Right. Why?"

"Nat, she brought Tony and Nebula back."

"Who's Nebula?"

Natasha's eyes landed on a blue stranger, and she wondered if there was any part of Nebula that wasn't machine. "Hi," she said, not knowing what else would suffice.

Nebula nodded.

"Where's the kid? Where's Parker?"

"Gone," Nebula said, "like the rest of the Guardians, like half the universe. Thanos did exactly what he said he was going to do. He wiped out fifty percent of all living creatures."

Natasha took a deep breath. "Okay. Okay, so . . . what now? We just sit around and wait for Tony's sedative to wear off?"

"We kill the purple bastard," Carol said.

"How?" Bruce asked, "we don't even know where he is."

"I do." All eyes turned to Nebula. "Thanos spent a long time trying to perfect me. When he worked, he talked about his great plan. Even disassembled, I wanted to please him. I'd ask where we would go once his plan was complete. His answer was always the same: To the Garden."

"That's cute," Rhodey muttered, "Thanos has a retirement plan."

"So where is he then?" Steve asked.

Rocket hopped up on the table. "When Thanos snapped his fingers, Earth became ground zero for a power surge of ridiculously cosmic proportions. No one's ever seen anything like it . . . until two days ago." A hologram of a planet popped up, a clear shockwave traversing the surface.

"On this planet," Nebula said, walking towards the hologram, "Thanos is there."

"He used the stones again," Natasha said.

"We'd be going in short-handed, you know," Bruce pointed out.

"Look," Rhodey said, "he's still got the stones, so. . ."

"So let's get him," Carol stated, as if the idea was clear as day, "we'll use them to bring everyone back."

"Just like that?" Rhodey asked, raising his eyebrows.

Steve nodded. "Yeah, just like that."

"Even if there's a small chance that we can undo this," Natasha said, "I mean we owe it to everyone who's not in this room to try."

"If we do this," Bruce said, "how do we know it's gonna end any differently than it did before?"

"Because before, you didn't have me."

"Hey, new girl, everyone here is about that superhero life. And if you don't mind my asking, where the hell have you been all this time?"

Carol understood Rhodey's concern, but she wasn't about to behave differently. She faced him with the same indifferent expression she gave everyone else. "There are a lot of other planets in the universe. And unfortunately, they didn't have you guys."

Thor got up from behind his bowl of bread and walked over to Carol. He held his hand up, catching Stormbreaker as it flew past Carol. The woman didn't even flinch. Instead, she gave Thor a smile.

"I like this one," Thor stated.

Steve looked around at what remained of the Avengers. "Let's go get this son of a bitch."

* * *

"Nat?"

Natasha didn't respond. She sat in the chair, fingers toying with her necklace, now holding both the locket and Anya's trinket. She'd been looking at the hologram a while ago, but she couldn't bear to see the smiling faces of the people she couldn't bring back, so she closed the disc and hooked it onto the necklace.

"Natasha."

Either she couldn't hear him, or she was ignoring him.

"Agent Romanoff, have you lost your hearing?"

Natasha jolted. "Tony. I didn't hear you coming."

"I noticed. You've been playing with that locket ever since I walked in . . . So, that trip was a failure."

"I don't need you to remind me," Natasha snapped, the empty gauntlet flashing in her memory.

Tony shrugged. "Sorry. Thought you could use a little normality. The asshole in me thought it was the right time to make a pathetic statement."

Surprisingly, Natasha smiled. "Thanks, Tony."

"How are you holding up?"

"How are you?" Natasha countered.

"We'll get by. We're Fury's biggest disaster prodigies, remember?"

Natasha smiled again. "You're a special kind, Stark. You really know how to lift a person's spirits, hm?"

"I also know how to put them down and often, I'm not sure how to do either one."

Natasha sighed and leaned back in the chair. "Guess we have to move on, then."

"Or try our hardest to bring them back."

"And if we can't?"

Tony shrugged. "What else can we do? Make the best of what's left."

Natasha shook her head, glancing down at the disc she'd picked up again. "You know Clint's missing? Don't know if he went off on his own or vanished with the rest. His family's gone. No sign of them. Lang, the giant from Germany, he's gone too. Van Dyne and Pym, Scott's family, gone, except his daughter. Wilson is gone too. Wanda, Vision, T'Challa, Shuri, Peter. Thanos didn't just disintegrate half the universe. He got rid of half the Avengers. How are we supposed to save the world if half of us aren't here?"

Tony sighed. "Yeah, well, life's a bitch sometimes. Do you remember 2012?"

"Feels like forever ago."

"That was a good time. We stopped the God of Mischief, although now we know it's Thanos, and sat down for shwarmas after. I had a floor for each of you in the tower. God, game night was the best."

A laugh bubbled from Natasha. "Pepper ripped us to _pieces_ in Monopoly. I've been bankrupt before and that didn't even feel half as painful as handing Pepper my last 200 -- that I earned from passing 'Go'."

Tony smiled. "I miss that freedom."

"I know." Natasha stared at her locket. "I miss a lot of things."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHO'S READY TO BOOM FIVE YEARS INTO THE FUTURE?????


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ATTN: READERS
> 
> The time heist will NOT be fully covered in this or coming chapters. Please remember Endgame for the coming chapters as a lot of it didn't make it into the book.
> 
> (in other words, I skipped a lot)

**_~~ 2023 ~~_ **

Natasha took a bite of the peanut butter sandwich, swallowing both the food and her tears. "Find him," she told Rhodey, "please."

The man nodded before he disconnected.

Alone, Natasha's emotions spilled out in silence. Her best friend, her partner, was out somewhere in the world, on a killing spree. As a former assassin, Natasha knew what that kind of violence did to a person. She knew Clint would never truly come back from that. She had been so relieved to find out he was alive five years ago, but as time progressed, she found herself wishing he had been taken like the rest. At least he would still be the Clint Barton she knew and loved.

"I'd offer to cook you dinner, but you look pretty miserable already."

Natasha lifted her head out of her hands. "You here to do your laundry?"

"And to see a friend."

"Clearly, your friend is fine." As if her body was set on proving her wrong, Natasha sniffed.

"Who is it this time?" Steve asked, leaning against the shelf near the desk Natasha sat behind.

"Clint. Rhodey found a drug cartel in Mexico, all dead. Weapons weren't drawn, arrows here and there. How was therapy today?"

Steve sighed and dropped his jacket on the desk. "I keep telling people to move on and . . . grow. Some do, but not us."

"If I move on," Natasha said, her fingers rubbing the locket, "who does this?"

"Maybe it doesn't need to be done," Steve said.

"I used to have nothing," Natasha said, "and then I met James. I thought that was enough. I was content. Then Hydra tore that away from us. I was alone. Then I got this job, this family. Through some miracle, I even got James back. I was better because of it, and even though they're all gone, I'm still trying to be better."

"We both need to get a life," Steve sighed.

"You first," Natasha said, smiling slightly.

Camera footage popped up behind Steve.

"Uh . . . hi! Is anyone home? This is Scott Lang. We met a few years ago, at the airport? In Germany? I got really big, and I had my mask on. You wouldn't recognize me."

"Is this an old message?" Steve asked, walking towards the hologram.

Natasha stood up behind the desk. "It's the front gate."

"Ant-man?" Scott continued on the footage, "Ant-man, I know you know that. I need to talk to you guys."

"How'd he find the compound?" Steve asked, "Tony moved it seven years ago."

"That's besides the point. Open the gate, let him in."

* * *

Scott paced the room in front of Steve and Natasha, looking as anxious as they'd ever seen anyone.

"Are you okay?" Natasha asked.

"I'm fine." He seemed to be struggling to ask something. After a few more steps, he faced them and blurted his question. "Have either of you ever studied quantum physics?"

Natasha and Steve shared a glance. "Only to make conversation," the former said.

"Alright," Scott said, "so . . . five years ago, right before Thanos, I was in a place called the quantum realm. The quantum realm is like its own microscopic universe. To get in there, you have to be incredibly small. Hope, she's my . . . she was my. . ." Scott struggled for a moment, not really knowing what to say, "she was supposed to pull me out. And then Thanos happened, and I got stuck in there."

"That must've been a very long five years," Natasha said.

"But that's just it! For me, it was five _hours_."

Natasha and Steve shared another glance, this one of bewilderment, while Scott went on.

"See, the rules of the quantum realm aren't like they are up here. Everything is unpredictable. Is that anybody's sandwich? I'm starving." Without waiting, Scott picked up half the sandwich Natasha had made.

Steve called Scott's attention from the sandwich. "Scott, what are you talking about?"

"What I'm saying is, time works differently in the quantum realm. The only problem is right now, we don't have a way to navigate it. But what if we did? I can't stop thinking about it. What if, we could somehow control the chaos, and we could navigate it? What if there was a way to enter the quantum realm at a certain point in time but then exit at _another_ point in time? Like. . ." Scott paused, regarding the pair before him as he swallowed the bite he had taken from the sandwich, "like before Thanos."

"Wait, are you talking about a time machine?"

Scott shook his head at Steve. "No. No, of course not. No, not a time machine. It's more like a . . . Yeah, a time machine. I know it's crazy. But I can't stop thinking about it. There's gotta be some way . . . No, it's crazy."

"I get e-mails from a raccoon," Natasha said, "so nothing sounds crazy anymore."

"So who do we talk to about this?" Steve asked, already knowing the answer. He glanced at Natasha, who only raised her eyebrows.

* * *

Tony sat down in the tiny little chair and pried the blue helmet off his daughter's head. "You should not be wearing that. It's part of a special anniversary gift I'm making for mom. Are you thinking about lunch? Want a handful of crickets?"

Five-year-old Morgan Stark shook her head, smiling. "No."

"That's what you want. How did you find this?"

Morgan glanced at the helmet Tony held up. "Garage."

"Really? Were you looking for it?"

Morgan shook her head, grinning guiltily. Tony pushed her hair from her face. "You like going to the garage, huh? So does daddy." He stood up and picked Morgan up, holding her in one hand, the helmet in the other. "It's fine, actually. Mom never wears anything I wear."

They started up to the house, but Tony stopped when he saw a car pull up in the driveway. From it, Steve, Scott and Natasha exited. Tony didn't miss the way Natasha's breath hitched and on autopilot, she reached for the locket hanging from her neck. Tony sighed. He was already dreading the conversation -- and he had no idea what they wanted. He could only hope Natasha had brought them over for lunch.

* * *

Tony wouldn't budge. Scott took a seat across him.

"Look, I know you got a lot on the line. You got a wife and a daughter. But I lost someone very important to me. A lot of people did. And now, now we have a chance to bring her back. Bring everyone back. And you're telling me that won't even --"

"That's right, Scott, I won't," Tony said, cutting Scott off, "Leave it. Got a kid."

As he mentioned her, Morgan ran out to the front porch and climbed into her father's lap, wrapping her small arms around his neck and hiding her face in his shoulder. "Mommy told me to come save you."

"Good job. I'm saved."

Natasha stared at the little girl, and her mind drifted to the seven-year-old child she had lost. "Tony, please. This is a second chance."

Tony gestured to Morgan with his head. "I got my second chance right here. I really wish you guys had come here to ask me something else. Anything else. I _have_ missed you, it's been . . . If you don't talk shop, you can stay for lunch."

Later that night, Tony stood at the sink, rinsing the dinner dishes. He was doing a pretty good job of it, then his hand slipped and he splashed water everywhere. Sighing, he turned the tap off and picked up a dishcloth to wipe the shelf. In the back, a photo frame had been hit as well.

Tony took it out and wiped the glass. He stared at the photo. He and Peter smiled at the camera, holding Peter's Stark internship certificate upside down. Something fiery flashed in the corners of his vision. Titan. The plant where he'd lost Petere, lost the time stone, Strange, and the Guardians. Where he'd lost nearly everything. He still had Pepper, and now Morgan. Others weren't so lucky.

* * *

"Shit!" Tony exclaimed, not having another way to express his surprise. He fell back into his chair and stared at the holographic model.

"Shit."

Tony frowned slightly, turning in his chair. Morgan smiled at him as she sat on the last step. "Shit," she said again.

"No, we don't say that. That's mom's word. She coined it."

"Why you up?"

"Because I got some important shit going on! What do you think? I got something on my mind."

Morgan smiled, then frowned. Tony found it adorable. "Was it juice pops?"

"Sure was," Tony said, getting up and walking to the staircase. "Great minds think alike. Juice pops . . . exactly what was on my mind." Tony glanced back at the model as he and Morgan headed to the kitchen.

One juice pop each later, Tony gently pushed Morgan's head back into the pillow. "That face goes there."

"Tell me a story."

"Once upon a time, a little girl went to bed. The end."

Morgan laughed. "That ain't the whole story!"

"What? It's your favourite!" Tony smiled and stood up to leave. "Love you tons," he said, dropping a kiss on Morgan's forehead.

"I love you 3000," Morgan countered.

Tony stopped in the doorway, amazed. " _Three thousand_ ," he repeated, "wow, that's crazy. Go to bed or I'll sell all your toys. Nighty night."

"Not that it's a competition or anything," Tony said when he approached Pepper in the living room, "but she loves me 3000. You were somewhere low in the six to nine hundred range."

Pepper scoffed.

"Whatcha reading?" Tony asked, not quite focused.

"Oh, just a book on composting."

"Oh? What's new in composting?"

Pepper barely began her answer when Tony blurted, "I figured it out."

"You know, just so we're talking about the same thing--"

"Time travel," Tony clarified.

"That is amazing . . . and terrifying."

Tony nodded as he sat down on the couch. Pepper turned to face him. "I got really lucky," she said.

"I know."

"A lot of people didn't."

"No, I can't help everybody."

"It sorta seems like you can," Pepper pointed out.

Tony shook his head. "Not if I stop. I could put a pin in it right now --" Tony mimed sticking a pin to a board "-- and stop."

"Tony, trying to get you to stop has been one the few failures of my life."

"I feel like I should lock it up in a box and dump it in the middle of a lake and just . . . go to bed."

Pepper titled her head and gave her husband a small smile. "But would you be able to rest?"

* * *

Tony sped into the compound, overshooting the spot where Steve stood. Slowly, the car reversed until it was parked in front of Steve. Tony rolled down the window. "Why the long face? Wait, lemme guess. He turned into a baby."

"Among other things, yeah," Steve said, thinking about the teenage and elderly Scott they'd seen. "What are you doing here?"

Tony killed the engine and got out of the car. He ignored the question. "That's the EPR paradox. Instead of pushing Lang through time, you might've wound up pushing time through Lang. It's tricky. Dangerous. Somebody shoulda cautioned you against it."

"You did," Steve said.

"Did I?" Tony asked, opening the trunk. "Thank god I'm here. Regardless, I fixed it."

Tony held up his hand to Steve. Across the back was a device, strapped around his palm. "A fully functioning Time-Space GPS. I just want peace. Turns out, resentment is corrosive, and I hate it."

"Me too," Steve said.

"We got a shot at getting these stones but . . . I gotta tell you my priorities. Bring back everyone? I hope, yes. Keep what I got? _I have to_ , at all costs." Tony walked towards Steve. "And maybe not die trying will be nice."

Steve held his hand out between them. "Sounds like a deal."

Tony shook his hand. He let go and walked back to the trunk of the car. Steve followed. He reached into the trunk and pulled out something covered. Pulling the cover off, he passed a shield to Steve.

"Tony, I can't--"

"Got a deal with the princess of Wakanda some time before . . . ended up with a shit tonne of Vibranium I was planning on threading into Parker's suit. I never got the chance. My old man made that old shield with what he thought was the last bit of Vibranium Earth had. Be honest with yourself, Rogers, you know you need the goddamn upgrade."

Steve hesitated. Tony had forgiven Steve for keeping the circumstances of Tony's parents' death from him _hours_ after Shuri cleaned and covered their bruises and cuts, but Steve always felt as if things would never quite be the same. He wasn't sure if this was perhaps Tony trying to let him know that whatever happened, it happened. They just had to move forward now

"Besides, I gotta get it out if the garage before Morgan takes it sledding," Tony added, holding the shield out for Steve to fit his arm into.

"Thank you, Tony."

"Will you keep that a little quiet? Didn't bring one for the whole team." Tony closed the trunk before turning back to Steve. "We are getting the whole team, right?"

"We're working on that right now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> planning the time heist up next whoop whoop


	16. Chapter 16

Tony walked around until he found Natasha. "I hear you found Barton. Fitting, that you'll be the one to bring him back into the Avengers."

Natasha's shoulders sagged. "I just want my family back, Tony."

"I know. We'll get them back, even if it's the last thing we do."

"Whatever it takes," Natasha murmured to herself.

"So, you off to Tokyo tonight, then?"

Natasha nodded. "Mmhm. Why, you planning on joining me?"

"Ha. I plan on taking a nap."

"A nap. Of course."

Tony smiled. "Get some rest, I'll ready your jet for you."

* * *

Natasha rushed forward when Clint returned, gripping a baseball glove. "Hey, look at me. Look at me. You okay?"

Clint nodded. "It worked." He held up the glove. "It worked."

Natasha smiled, turning back to see Tony returning her grin.

* * *

Five images stared at the Avengers. The Tesseract, the orb containing the power stone, the Aether, the eye of Agamotto, and the Soul Stone.

"Okay, so the 'how' works," Steve said, "now we gotta figure out the when and the where. Almost all of us has had an encounter with at least one of the six infinity stones."

Tony stepped up on the other side of the six holographic images. "Well, I'd substitute the word 'encounter' for 'damn well near been killed' by one of the six infinity stones. Or more, y'know, some of us. . ." He trailed off, muttering to himself.

"I haven't," Scott said, "I don't even know what the hell you're all talking about."

"Regardless," Bruce said, "we only have enough Pym Particles for one round trip each, and these stones have been in a lot of different places throughout history."

" _Our history_ ," Tony said, "so, not a lot of convenient spots to just drop in."

"Which means we have to pick our targets."

"Correct," Tony said, glancing at Clint.

"Let's start with the Aether. Thor, what do you know?"

They all turned to the God of Thunder, who was sitting on a chair in all his overweight glory, sunglasses over his eyes -- fast asleep. Tony's mind wandered to Morgan asking him about the Avengers, a little folder Friday kept. He smiled to himself as he remembered Morgan asking which one would make a better pillow than Pepper. He said it was him. Morgan said it was probably Bruce. If she could see Thor now . . . Tony was sure Morgan would absolutely adore him.

"Is he _asleep_?" Natasha asked.

"Pretty sure he's dead," Rhodey mumbled.

Once Thor had woken, he trudged to the front and glanced at the holograms, pulling his sunglasses off. "Where to start? Umm . . . the Aether, first, is not a stone, someone called it a stone before." Thor gestured to Steve, who frowned slightly as Thor continued. It's more of a . . . an angry sludge thing, so . . . someone's gonna need to amend that. Here's an interesting story though, many years ago . . . my grandfather had to hide the stones from the Dark Elves."

Thor made as if he were telling a ghost story over a campfire. He wiggled his fingers, imitating a spooking ghost. "Wooooh, scary beings. So Jane," Thor said as an image of Jane replaced the photo of the Aether. "Oh, there she is," he said to himself, "that's Jane. She's . . . an old flame of mine . . . She . . . she stuck her hand inside a rock this one time . . . and then the Aether stuck itself inside her . . . and, she became very, very sick. So I had to take her to Asgard -- which is where I'm from -- and we had to try and fix her. We were dating at the time, you see. I got to introduce her to my Mother. . ."

Thor trailed off slightly. He looked more broken than anyone had ever seen him, seemingly on the verge of tears. "Who's dead, and oh you know, Jane and I aren't even dating anymore, these things happen though, you know, nothing last forever. The only permanent --"

Tony got up to guide Thor back to a chair.

"I'm not done yet, the only thing permanent in life is impermanence."

"Awesome," Tony said, clapping a few times in the hopes of placating Thor. "Eggs? Breakfast?"

"I'd like a Bloody Mary," Thor said, smiling thinly. 

* * *

The Avenger sat around a table, eating. Rocket paced the table as the orb was visible on a hologram screen.

"Quill said he stole the power stone from Morag."

"Is that a person?" Scott asked.

"Morag's a planet. Quill was a person."

"A planet? Like in outer space?"

"Oh, look. It's like a little puppy, all happy and everything." Rocket began to imitate taking to a dog. "Do you wanna go to space? You wanna go to space, puppy? I'll take you to space."

Natasha sighed.

* * *

"Thanos found the Soul Stone on Vormir," Nebula said.

"What is Vormir?" Natasha said, curled up in her seat, notepad and pen in hand.

"A dominion of death, at the very centre of Celestial existence. It's where . . . Thanos murdered my sister."

Natasha looked up as a heavy silence fell over the room. Shaking her head slightly, she wrote it down while Scott tried to break the silence.

"Noted."

He didn't do a very good job.

* * *

Tony and Natasha lay in opposite directions on the cluttered table, while Bruce lay on the floor, leaning against a clutter of books and papers

"That Time Stone guy. . ." Natasha murmured.

"Doctor Strange," Bruce supplied.

"Yeah, what kind of doctor was he?"

"Neuro-stuff meets rabbit from a hat," Tony said, "nice place in the village, though."

"Yeah. Sullivan Street. Hmm . . . Bleecker."

"Wait, he lived in New York?" Natasha asked.

"No, he lived in Toronto," Tony said.

"Guys, if you pick the right year," Natasha said slowly, "there are _three_ stones in New York."

Bruce sat up in surprise. "Shut the front door!"

* * *

The holograms showed the different stones. The Soul and Power stone were to be taken in 2014. The Reality stone would be taken from Jane in 2013. The Space, Mind, and Time stones would be taken from New York in 2012.

"All right," Steve said, "we have a plan. Six stones, three teams, one shot."

Natasha stared at the stones. There was a chance, after five years, after forcing herself to come to terms with what she had lost . . . there was a chance she could bring them back. There was a chance her family would return.

James and Anya would be alive and breathing again.

Natasha was ready to do whatever it took to bring back her husband and daughter. _Whatever_ _it_ _took_ _._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'ALL KNOW WHAT'S COMING NEXT Y'ALL BEST PREPARE YOURSELVES I CRIED DURING WRITING, EDITING, PROOFREADING AND UPDATING. Coming soon, the second saddest bit I have ever written.
> 
> Tony Nat & Bruce own my heart.
> 
> Fat Thor makes me feel good about me and I wish Marvel handled him properly instead of making my son a huge joke.


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHO'S READY TO CRY???

"See you in a minute," Natasha said to Steve, smiling excitedly at the prospect of time travel -- and space travel.

After dropping Nebula and Rhodey off on Morag in 2014, Clint and Natasha headed to Vormir in the same year.

"We're a long way from Budapest, huh?"

Natasha only laughed. After five years of a dark and dreary world, punctuated only by small and short visits to the Stark household, it was simply exhilarating to see the colours of the universe flash by as they travelled through the jump point. When they finally came up on Vormir, both stared at the planet in awe.

"Wow," Clint murmured, "under different circumstances, this would be totally awesome."

* * *

Climbing the mountain was . . . _not_ so totally awesome.

"I bet the raccoon didn't have to climb a mountain," Natasha grumbled.

"Technically, he's not a raccoon, you know."

"Whatever. He eats garbage."

"Welcome."

Natasha and Clint both drew their weapons as a cloaked figure approached.

"Natasha," it said, looking at her," daughter of Ivan."

"Clint," it continued, turning to him, "son of Edith."

"Who are you?" Natasha asked.

"Consider me a guide. To you and to all who seek the Stone."

"Oh, good," Natasha said, "you tell us where it is, and we'll be on our way."

"If only it were that simple."

Natasha and Clint followed their 'guide' to the edge of the cliff.

"What you seek lies before you, as does what you fear."

"The stone is down there," Natasha said, looking over the edge at the deathly drop.

"For one of you. For the other . . . In order to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. An everlasting exchange. A soul for a soul."

" _Shit_."

* * *

Natasha sat on a log while Clint glared daggers at the Stonekeeper, as if it were _his_ fault. Natasha pulled her necklace from under her suit, rubbing the locket as she thought about the man who had given it to her.

 _Whatever it takes_.

The Wakandan disc knocked Natasha's fingers, and she glanced down at it. Her thoughts strayed from Bucky to Anya, the beautiful little girl who had called her 'Mamma' without any hesitation the moment she discovered why Natasha was at the children's home.

 _Whatever it takes_.

She could help bring them back, but she wouldn't be there to welcome them. She would never see them again, just as they would never see her. Was that fair to either of them? She had lost a husband and a daughter. She was considering costing Bucky his wife and Anya her mother. But she had to.

 _Whatever it takes_.

The alternative was to let Clint go, but she knew she would never be able to do that, not when she could make the sacrifice. Clint had three children who needed their father. Laura needed her husband.

 _Anya needs her mother and James needs his wife_ , a voice in the back of her head told her.

 _Anya and James will be fine_ , she told herself. James would have Steve and Sam -- and Wakanda. Anya would have Peter and Shuri and the nation of Wakanda. James and Anya would have each other. They would have the Avengers.

Clint's family was not so involved with everyone. They needed _him_.

_Whatever it takes._

Natasha told herself the same words over and over again, until she wasn't even sure what the truth was anymore. She just knew that she couldn't let someone else die when she could stop it. She had to protect what was left of her family at all costs, hoping and praying that it would bring the rest of her family back.

They'd forgive her, right?

James would live his life without the Winter Soldier's past hanging over him. Anya would grow up beautifully.

It was a pity she wouldn't see it. A pity, indeed, but she was prepared to make the sacrifice.

Clint didn't see it coming. He was stuck in his own inner arguments. He looked to the log only to find it empty. He realised too late what was happening. Natasha stood at the edge, overlooking her destination. She turned back to Clint as he rushed to grab her.

He lunged for her and managed to snatch her wrist. Her momentum jerked him forward until he was holding on to the cliff with one hand and Natasha with the other. He could not let go, not until Natasha was back on the top of the cliff. He began to pull her up.

"When you see them, tell them I love them."

"Shut up."

"And that I'm sorry."

She closed her eyes and saw her daughter, laughing and skipping about the fields in Wakanda.

"Nat, please. Please, don't. _Please_."

She saw her husband, wrapping his arm around her daughter and playfully tackling her. Her daughter stood up and threw her head back as she laughed. Her husband smiled warmly, first at their daughter, then at her. _I love you_. That was her family. She loved them, with all her heart. She would do whatever it took to even have a chance at bringing them back, no matter the cost.

She smiled. "It's okay," she whispered.

 _Whatever_ _it takes_.

"No, no it's not. It's not, it -- NO!"

She kicked off the wall, forcing her arm from Clint's grasp. He stared in horror as she hit the ground, the impact echoing all around.

"BRING HER BACK! BRING HER BACK _RIGHT NOW_!"

"I cannot."

"Nat. . ." A surge of energy ripped through the planet, shooting up and spreading across the sky. It was the brightest thing Clint had ever witnessed. Natasha's soul was the purest white, more beautiful than life itself.

Clint sat up slowly, the gentle ripples of the water mocking the harsh reality he had to face. He opened his hand to see the stone gleaming at him. Blinded by grief, Clint failed to notice Natasha's chain tangled around his fingers as he returned home.

Everyone seemed to be on some kind of euphoria. They'd just succeeded at time and space travel! They spoke excitedly over one another until Steve looked around and frowned.

"Clint, where's Nat?"

He couldn't look a single one of them in the eye. He gripped the stone tight, wanting nothing more than to crush it or throw it back at Vormir in exchange for Natasha -- even though he knew he could _never_ get her back.

* * *

The five of them stood out on the deck, a heavy silence over all of them.

"Do we know if she had family?" Bruce asked softly.

"Yeah," Steve whispered, "us."

"What?" Thor asked, turning away from the water to glare at Bruce and Steve.

"I just asked --"

"Yeah, you're acting as if she's dead. Why are we acting like she's dead?" Thor looked around at the remaining Avengers. "We have the stones. . ."

 _The stones_. . . Tony stopped paying attention to the chaos around him. Natasha _died_ for that stone. He was going to do whatever it took to make her sacrifice worth it. Something half tucked into Clint's pocket reflected the sun into Tony's eye. He blinked rapidly, turning his head slightly. When he looked back, he recognised the item. Reached forward, he snatched the necklace from Clint. The man stopped yelling at Thor midway through a sentence to look at Tony, who stared at the locket and disc, heartbroken.

"It was Nat's, she --" Clint began.

"I know."

"She's not coming back," Bruce told Thor, "she's not. We have to bring everyone else back. She died for it. We have to make it worth it."

"We will," Steve said softly.

Tony closed his fist around the locket and the disc, not noticing how either dug into his hand. Without a word, he stormed off.

* * *

"Friday."

"Yes, boss?"

Tony took a shaky breath, trying to calm himself.

"Shall I call Pepper?"

"No. No, I want you to um . . . access Jarvis' archives."

"Which files would you like me to access?"

Tony looked around the empty room, hoping in futility that Natasha might jump from behind something and smile that wicked smirk at him. "Red Hot Mess."

Friday took a moment to access the files. "Would you like me to remove the files from the archive, boss?"

Tony nodded. "Download them."

"To?"

Tony set Anya's disc on the table and watched it light up as Friday connected to it. "That."

"Yes, boss."

"When you're done with that, access your own archives for the same files and download them. Let me know when you've finished."

"Yes, boss."

"One last thing," Tony said. Friday waited for his instruction. "Once you've loaded all the files, see if you can load Project Virgil onto the disc. Not a priority, though. The archived files are. Do those first."

"I'll make a note of it."

While Friday downloaded her files, Tony got to work creating the nano-gauntlet.

* * *

"All right, the glove's ready," Rocket said, "question is, who's gonna snap their fricking fingers?"

"I'll do it," Thor said, hobbling over to the gauntlet.

Tony's eyes went from Thor's bleary and puffy eyes to the beer bottle in his hand. "No."

"Us sitting around isn't going to bring half the universe back. I'm the strongest Avenger, okay? So the responsibility is mine."

Tony had to physically push Thor away from the gauntlet.

"It's my duty."

"Buddy, it really isn't."

"Let me do this! Just . . . just let me do something great."

"Look . . . it's not just the fact that that glove is channelling enough energy to light up a continent, I'm telling you, you're in no condition."

"What do you think is coursing through my veins?" Thor asked Tony.

"Cheeze whiz," Rhodey mumbled.

"Lighting," Thor corrected.

"Lightning won't help you, pal," Bruce said, walking up to the gauntlet, "it's gotta be me."

Thor pushed away from Tony, but he thankfully didn't try to make a grab for the gauntlet.

"You saw what those stones did to Thanos. It almost killed him. None of you could survive."

"How do we know _you_ will?" Scott asked.

Bruce shrugged. "I don't. But the radiation's mostly gamma. It's like. . ." Bruce regarded the gauntlet before him, "like I was made for this."

"Good to go?" Tony asked a moment later.

Bruce nodded, holding the gauntlet. "Let's do this."

"You remember . . . everyone Thanos snapped away five years ago and just bringing them back to now, today. Don't change anything from the last five years."

"Got it."

Around Bruce, everyone suited up. Tony formed a shield in front of Clint. "Friday, do me a favour and activate protocol eight."

The windows and doors shut down, barricading the Avengers and putting the compound on lockdown. No one saw Nebula -- younger by nine years -- slip away.

"Everybody comes home," Bruce said, before putting his hand into the gauntlet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> send in ur thoughts ladies & gents  
> Keyboard smashes are acceptable responses to this chapter, as well as curses and tears. Have a lovely day, it gets worse.


	18. Chapter 18

Bucky slowly stood up and looked around him. "Widow?"

He could faintly hear someone calling out for someone else.

"Nat? Natalia!"

Wanda ran right into him. "Bucky!"

"Wanda. Where's Nat?"

"I don't know. Everyone's missing."

"Vision?"

Wanda shook her head. "He's gone."

Bucky studied her for a moment before pulling the young woman into a hug. "I'm sorry."

"Thanks."

Bucky waited for Wanda to pull away, knowing she was the one who needed the comfort. "Find anyone else?"

"No. Nat was right in front of me. Steve, too. I haven't seen them."

"Let's go."

Bucky started to walk with Wanda. He stopped suddenly.

"What is it?"

"Anya."

"Who's that?"

"I need to go back," Bucky said, already leaving. Not about to be left clueless, Wanda followed, using her magic to keep up with Bucky.

Bucky stormed through his home. "Anya! Anya, where are you? _Anastasia_!"

"Dad?"

" _Dad_?" Wanda echoed.

"Daddy!"

"Anya!"

The pair rounded a corner and collided with three people. All five fell to the floor. Bucky waited while Ramonda fussed over him. Then she asked for her son.

"We don't know," Wanda answered honestly.

"Dad!" Anya scrambled off Shuri and wrapped her arms around Bucky.

"Who is this?" Wanda asked.

"Your niece," Bucky said without hesitation, "Anya."

"Where's Mamma?"

"I don't know, _kroshka_. I don't know."

Anya lifted her arms and waited for Bucky to stand and pick her up. "Mamma told me to stay with _umkhulu_. Mamma said -- she said -- she said she's going to try her best to come back. But she might not."

"I'm sure she'll do her best," Wanda promised. "We'll look for her," she added, glancing at Bucky, who nodded.

"Stay here, Anya. Stay --"

"Brother!"

Ramonda looked like she was going to faint. She had, by some miracle, recovered all three of her missing children. She hoped Natasha would return soon. She just wanted a peaceful dinner with all her children and her granddaughter.

A portal opened in front of them.

"James."

"Pepper? Wait, what are you wearing? Who the hell is that?"

"I'm Strange. It's been --"

"Okay, so?" Shuri asked. "What's your name?"

Stephen sighed, choosing to ignore the question. "It's been five --"

"Who the hell is _that_?!"

Pepper tugged her daughter forward with a smile on her face. "This is Morgan, my daughter."

Bucky put Anya down. "This is Anastasia, my _daughter_."

"James, they need us."

"Where?" he asked, his gaze drifting back to the suit Pepper was wearing. "You look like Stark."

"I know. James, five years ago, Thanos came to earth with his Infinity Gauntlet and wiped out fifty percent of all living creatures after taking the Mind Stone from Vision. You -- and your daughter -- were part of that. They . . . well, it's tough to explain, but Tony figured out time travel and Thanos from nine years ago somehow managed to jump forward. They need us."

Bucky nodded, preparing himself to fight once more at Natasha's side.

"Morgan, stay here."

"Mommy, I want to come with you. I want to see dad."

Anya tugged her father's jacket. "I wanna see Mamma. I want to come too."

"Tell you what," Bucky said, getting down in front of both girls. "You stay here in Wakanda, and when this is all over, I'll let Shuri teach you to build a suit."

Anya's eyes lit up. Morgan frowned. "Like Mommy's and dad's?"

Knowing it would propel Morgan to stay where she was safe, Pepper nodded. "Exactly."

Anya held out her hand for Morgan. "Come meet _umkhulu_. It means grandmother. She's not actually my grandmother. I'm adopted, you see. . ."

"Thank you, James," Pepper said.

Bucky nodded. "Let's get going then."

Minutes later, once again armed with Natasha's gun, Bucky stepped through a portal beside Wanda, Shuri, T'Challa, and all the forces Wakanda had to offer.

He had never in his life seen such a massive army. From portals all around, armies spilled. Wakanda was not the only nation prepared to fight for the universe.

In the midst of destruction and flames, the Avengers multiplied. The Valkyrie rode her pegasus, leading the Asgardians. From another portal, Skrull warriors emerged. From a third, Wong led the masters of the Mystic Arts, the golden glow of their magic stark against the darkness. Several Ravager ships flew from above. The Guardians and Spiderman joined the battle. From all corners of the universe, heroes entered the battlefield.

"Avengers!" Bucky saw Thor's hammer fly right into his best friend's hand. "Assemble."

* * *

"And I . . . am . . . Iron Man."

White light blinded Tony. When he opened his eyes, he was surrounded by a world of orange. Water soaked his shoes. His damaged armour was gone, replaced by his casual clothing. A single structure stood. Under it, a familiar braid of red locks gleamed at him.

"Nat?"

She turned at the sound of her name. "Did you do it?"

Tony nodded.

"What did it cost?"

"Nothing less than what it was worth."

Natasha smiled as he stepped closer to her shade. "Go. Say your goodbyes. You'll see me soon."

"Nat, I--"

" _Go_ ," she said again, gently, "say your goodbyes. Do what I never got the chance to. Tell them you love them. When you close your eyes again, I'll be there. I have to warn you, though, I'm not going to be happy to see you there."

Tony smiled. "Sorry."

"Go," she said once more, giving him a smile and nodding once. 

Tony blinked. When he opened his eyes, he saw the last of Thanos fade into dust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOW WHAT AN END STAY TUNED FOR THE ~~FINALE~~ EPILOGUE
> 
> i know its short but the final chapter's a little longer


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes a family is a little wolf, a baby Stark, a retired CEO mom, a retired assassin dad, a loveable aunt, a soon-to-be CEO brother, and a spider-brother, and that's okay. 
> 
> Sometimes a family is them and everyone else too, and that's okay too.
> 
> and sometimes . . . sometimes a family is a group of superheroes. 
> 
> \---alternatively, the one where Natasha and Tony leave their daughters a whack-job family, but everyone is happy about it

**_~~ 2033 ~~_ **

Chaos reigned.

Chaos reigned _violently_.

Peter Parker was trying his level best to focus, but it wasn't helping when his legal guardians were screaming at each other. Something about an Iron Man tie. Harley crossed the floor, shooting Peter a grin and a wave. Peter sighed and debated slamming his laptop closed around his head.

"Have you seen Pep's tie? She's just about ready to commit murder."

As if on cue, they heard Pepper's voice from somewhere else on the penthouse floor. "May Parker, I swear to God, if James lost that tie, I'll do something illegal!"

"Let's do it, then," May shouted back, "I know the law!"

"I _am_ the law!" Pepper screeched, quickly followed by, "JAMES!"

Peter and Harley turned their heads to the other side.

"WHAT?!"

Before any of the three could continue screaming, Morgan ran across the floor. "I found the tie! I found the tie!"

"I'm so tempted to go find my old place in Queens to work," Peter mumbled.

"You have the rest of your career on a silver platter, Mr Agent of the Year, for like the past five years or more. I wouldn't fret about one small task if I were you."

Peter rolled his eyes as Harley tied his tie in the reflection of the full-length windows. "So do you, Mr acting and soon-to-be CEO of Stark Industries."

"Jealous?" Harkey asked with a smirk.

"As if. I have enough on my plate worrying about global -- and otherworldly -- threats as well as Morgan's lack of self-control and Anya's inexplicable need to snoop in my files. I _really_ don't need a day job."

"Spiderman _is_ your day job, Petey."

Peter shrugged. "Whatever. The point is, I think we're all glad you're Pep's successor. Maybe one day when she's old enough, you can pass it to Morgan. But right now . . . she's got to get through her teenage years first. God, was I this troublesome?"

"Yes," May said as she walked into the room, smoothing down her pencil skirt. "Pepper! You're running a tight schedule!"

"I was not."

"Peter, when you were sixteen, you ran off to Germany to fight a battle you didn't even know that much about."

Peter opened his mouth, then shut it again. Harley grinned.

May nodded. "May knows best."

Pepper slid into the room in her stockinged feet, shoes in hand and a bunch of keys in the other. "Where's James?"

May took the keys from Pepper. "I'll tell him to get the car ready. Put your shoes on. We're going to make it in time, relax."

"May, you're a lifesaver."

Anya walked out of the elevator. "Dad says you'll be leaving through the back garage. There's a horde of reporters at the front, all waiting to get a statement from Stark Industries' resigning and new CEOs."

May nodded and left in search of Bucky.

Harley walked up to Pepper and helped her pin her hair down. In the last eleven years, everyone in the family had become hair experts. Pepper and May were often gone early to keep Stark Industries running, which meant someone had to do the girls' hair. With Bucky regularly driving the women to work and then heading off to his own small job -- with Sam Wilson, no less -- the task more often than not fell to Peter or Harley. Both were now qualified hair stylists.

By the time Pepper had put her shoes on, Harley had perfectly styled her hair.

"Calm down, Pep, it's just a press conference. You've done hundreds before."

"Not like this!" Pepper cried.

"You'll be fine. Just don't do anything Mr Stark would've."

"That's very helpful, Harley."

"Laying the sarcasm on a bit thick there, Pep," May said, adjusting her own suit as she caught a glance of her reflection. "Does the skirt make me look fat?"

"You look fine, Aunt May," Harley said, fixing Pepper's tie. "Here, let me tie yours, too."

"Thank you, Harley."

Pepper pulled out a lipstick tube from her purse and handed it to May. "Here, it matches your shirt."

"Really?"

Bucky appeared in the doorway. "Chop-chop, ladies! We're running a tight schedule! Tie faster, Harley!"

Morgan snorted. "Your dad just said 'chop-chop' to an actual living human."

Anya sighed. "He does things like that sometimes."

"Look, if you want me to strangle Aunt May," Harley said as he finished tying May's tie, "you could've just said so."

"Everyone out!" Bucky yelled, pointing the door. "God, you act like I'm your driver or something."

"You are," Harley said as he passed, "you offered."

"He's right, you know," May said, following.

Pepper was nearly out the door when she remembered something. "Peter?!"

"Yeah?" Peter leaned into view from where he had been sitting and watching the chaos unravel.

"Watch the girls. Love you, bye!"

"Love you too, Pep."

"Bye, Pep!" Anya called.

"Have fun, mom!"

Once the door closed behind the three, Peter stood up and closed his laptop. "Rooftop dodgeball? The extreme level, of course. I know I'm supposed to pretend like I never caught you, but you can wear your suits and we'll see who's the best."

"Yes!" both girls cried, bouncing off the couch.

While Morgan and Anya raced to their bedroom, Peter walked on slowly to his own. As he left, he caught sight of the display in the centre of the main room.

Pepper and Bucky had long decided to put away their suits and focus on, A) looking after their odd array of children and B) running Stark Industries. It was a decision set in stone after Pepper turned fifty. Well, to be fair, it should be all credited to May, who had interrupted dinner one evening to tell Bucky and Pepper that she simply could not handle trying to reign in four children that had the tendency to do wild and mildly dangerous things.

While Harley was no superior-level genius, he had a kind smile and way with words everyone else seemed to lack in comparison. He quickly became the new face of Stark Industries, one of many inspired by Tony Stark to become something great. Of course, he was a total disaster behind the scenes, even at thirty-one.

Nearing a conventional retirement age, Pepper had decided to resign -- on paper only. The press conference was to officially introduce Harley Keener as the new CEO of Stark Industries. May, appointed Pepper's PA days after she unintentionally proved more than capable of filling in the shoes Pepper had worn so very many years ago, was there to keep Harley from doing something Tony would've done.

Bucky wanted to tag along, mainly to give Harley and the two women a thumbs up when they were up in front of all the reporters. He offered to drive them all to the office because all three seemed to be on edge for this particular event.

That left twenty-seven-year-old Peter Parker to babysit. In the eyes of a parent, he was the absolute worst.

Exhibit A would be his suggestion of extreme dodgeball.

Peter smiled at the display. Standing front and centre was Tony's nano-tech suit. On the left was the Rescue armour Pepper had retired from. The Captain America shield hung on the wall between the suits. On the right of Tony's suit was the Iron Spider suit specifically designed for Peter.

"Karen."

"Yes, Peter?"

"Don't _ever_ delete the Iron Dad folder."

"Of course."

Peter hurried to catch up with Morgan and Anya, mask in hand.

"Looks nice," Morgan commented.

"Thanks. Some genius I know improved my old suit."

"What a clever genius."

"Enough with the self-praise," Anya cut in, bouncing the rubber ball, "who's ready to get their ass handed to them?"

"You?" Peter asked, shooting Anya a smirk before pulling his mask on.

"Friday," Morgan said, her helmet covering up her wicked grin, "drop my needle."

* * *

"PETER!" Morgan shrieked as she tumbled over the edge of the building.

"Hold on!" Peter swung by, snatching Morgan seconds before her grip failed and the pair crashed through the floor-to-ceiling windows in time to see Anya fly into the display he had been looking at hours ago. Thankfully, the glass held and the most damage Anya received was the force of hurling into it.

Morgan stood up and hit her left foot on the ground several times. "Friday?"

"Thrusters critically damaged."

"What do we do?" Morgan asked, running up to help Peter pick Anya off the floor.

"I don't know."

"You're the oldest!" Anya cried.

"Not mentally!"

"Okay, everyone stop panicking," Morgan said, pulling something off from behind her ear. Her damaged suit seemed to peel off her body. "Where did the bastard go?"

Anya shook her head, manually tearing the broken pieces off her own suit off to reveal the pyjamas she had been wearing underneath. "I don't know. He -- she -- _it_ vanished when you crashed through the window."

Peter glanced at the glass. "Yeah, Pep's gonna kill us."

"If we survive, you mean," Morgan muttered, opening her school bag and scratching around for a moment. "Did either of you take my prototype collection? Nevermind, found it."

Opening a little black case, Morgan handed Anya a device that looked a lot like Clint's hearing aids. "I've been working on these for two years. Shuri gave me the idea when Peter took us to visit Wakanda back then. They're kind of stored and activated like the Black Panther suits, but instead of Vibranium, they're nano-tech, like my dad's suit. They also work like it."

Anya slipped the device into her ear, and the back end seemed to magnetically attach itself to her head.

"I have one for you too, Peter, but the suit's nothing more than a design. It _is_ connected to the Iron Spider suit though. . ."

"Good enough," Peter said, glancing at the rips in his own suit. "Thank you."

Whatever had attacked them on the rooftop, the thing Anya had chased back inside, appeared with a pop and flourish of pale smoke. Peter recognised the suited up woman from the Peak files.

"Get --" Peter's warning was cut short as all three were blasted back. When the smoke cleared, the three stood in their fully formed suits, the model on the right of Tony's suit empty, the glass decorating the floor around them.

Anya nodded at the white suit. "Nice."

"You're welcome. So, Peter. How do we do the whole superhero thing?"

"Well, mainly, you try not to die." Peter fired webs to their attacker, trying to web her up.

"Hello again, Anya."

Anya turned to Morgan. "You loaded Virgil into my suit?"

"Into your neural device and the main system," Morgan corrected, "she's friends with Friday and Karen."

"What a genius," Anya mumbled, focusing her attention on the figure walking towards them.

"Where is the one they call Stark?"

Peter and Anya subconsciously covered Morgan up.

"He died saving the universe eleven years ago," Peter said.

The woman raised the blade in her hand and pointed between the pair. "I want what _she_ has."

"And what is that?" Morgan asked, stepping forward despite Anya and Peter's unwillingness to move.

"I want what's working so hard in that head of yours."

"Why?" Anya asked, "what for?"

"Wouldn't you little children like to know. I shan't tell. Give me the girl and you live."

Anya narrowed her eyes, her helmet forming as she whipped out her mother's electroshock batons. "You'll die before you touch my sister."

"Who are you?" Peter asked.

"Some call me a witch, others a miracle. You can call me Sin."

Anya was quick, knocking her father's shield from its hook and using it to protect all three from Sin's blast.

"Hold tight," Peter said, grabbing Anya around her waist. "Morgan, if you will?"

Morgan fired a blast of her own at Sin, then at the chandelier May and Pepper had specifically chosen. In the chaos, Peter fled with Anya, Morgan close behind.

"Where are we going?" Morgan asked once her helmet had completely covered her head.

"Away from Sin."

Unfortunately, they didn't get very far. Dodging an attack from Sin, all three crashed into a billboard in Time's Square. Morgan and Peter managed to not hit the ground, and Anya used the shield to break her fall. If the hole in the billboard didn't grab enough attention, the sound of Captain America's shield hitting the tar did.

Sin prepared another attack, but something threw her off her hoverboard.

"What part of 'take a break' didn't you understand, Parker?"

Peter smiled after helping Anya up. His mask moved back and he gave a ridiculous bow. "I thought I left you in a lab, princess."

Shuri rolled her eyes behind the Black Panther mask. "I modified your web shooters."

Anya and Morgan both jumped, the latter letting out a short scream when someone appeared on Peter's other side. "Need a hand?"

"Cass! You got your suit working again!"

"Yeah, um, why are the children here?" Cassie asked, her helmet snapping off.

"I'm _eighteen_ ," Anya stated, dusting dirt and glass off the shield now firmly attached to her arm.

"Child," Shuri said, shrugging.

"You pathetic excuse of a babysitter," Cassie muttered, giving Peter a slight shove.

"That's fair, but I had to get them out of the house. Sin--"

Sin reared her head just then, roaring like an animal. The five of them jumped as a somewhat damaged ship barreled right into Sin. With the ship out of commission, the Valkyrie sauntered over.

"Your majesty," Peter greeted politely, "are you drunk?"

"Very. Who did I run over?"

"A villain," Morgan answered, "I wouldn't worry."

Of course, that seemed to do nothing to stop Sin.

"It's like fighting an immortal," Anya grumbled.

"I am Sin and I--"

"And you can shut up."

Morgan cheered as an arrow soared overhead, catching Sin in the middle of her chest. The rest watched Cassie and the archer do their own handshake. It reminded Peter of his and Ned's own handshake. "Good to see you away from that computer Parker put in front of you, Nic," Cassie said.

"Shut up, Cass," Nicole said, pulling her mask off. "She's the one who attacked the Stark-Barnes-Parker household, right?"

Peter nodded to the question directed at him. "Yeah, but she doesn't seem to want to stay dead. Speaking of --" Peter broke off and gestured to Sin, who stood up and yanked the arrow from her chest.

Nicole nocked another arrow and drew back on the string, stepping in line with Shuri, who raised her blasters -- now made small enough to wear around her wrist but twice as powerful as the first. Cass unfolded her helmet and prepared to physically fight Sin. Morgan and Anya pushed forward as their own helmets reformed, Anya kneeling in front of Morgan with the shield up, her mother's gun resting on the top, Morgan aiming her palms at Sin.

"Who _the hell_ are you?" Sin snarled, taking a step forward.

That small action of Sin's caused a chain reaction. Nicole drew the arrow back as far as it could. Both Shuri and Morgan fired up their blasters. Cassie dropped into a stance, ready to shrink and sprint for Sin, while her insect-like wings prepared for flight. Anya cocked her gun and braced her shield for impact. The Valkyrie fell over on the side. And behind them all, Peter stood tall.

 _Sin_ _didn't stand a chance_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AYYY 
> 
> the last part is -- keeping in theme with Marvel -- a small little post-credits scene, if you will. I refuse to be held responsible for the emotions the post-credits scene evokes. I didn't write it that scene ghost-wrote itself.
> 
> also, don't get me wrong, I love Captain!Sam as much as the next marvel stan, but I had an ending planned long before I saw Endgame, and in it, I had Steve and Tony passing their mantles to Bucky and Pepper respectively. I knew when I started this that regardless what the outcome of Endgame was, I was gonna stick with the ending. My only regret is that I didn't write it all that well. Stick around, though, you might get more from me about this.
> 
> you can find my usual thanks and goodbyes at the end of the next update :-)


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This gave me the closure Endgame failed to and I almost didn't put it in the book

"Agent Romanoff."

Natasha stilled.

"Did you miss me?"

Natasha glanced at the man who sat on the floor beside her. He was young, she noticed at once. Young as he had been when she had first met him.

"So, this is what the end feels like, huh?"

"You shouldn't be here."

"Neither should you."

"You had a kid," Natasha argued, "you had Pepper. They need you, the Avengers need you."

Tony studied Natasha. "They need you just as much as they need me. But they'll be fine. Pepper will be fine. Morgan will be fine. Can you say the same about your family?"

Natasha shrugged. "I had to. Bucky will be okay. He'll get through it."

"And what about your kid?"

Natasha looked at Tony for the first time since he sat down. Tony stood up and held out his hand to her. "Come on, I want to show you something."

Natasha walked a few steps with Tony, until a scene faded in. Replacing the whiteness around her, Natasha recognised Tony's home near the lake. "What is this?"

"Our funeral. But that's not what I want you to see. Look over there."

Natasha looked where Tony pointed. Peter Parker stood with a blank expression on his face. On one side stood May, a comforting hand on his shoulder. On the other was Bucky. In Peter's arms was Natasha's daughter, her head buried in Peter's chest.

"Peter never mentioned her to us before . . . he did blurt it out after we undid the snap and got him back, though. I don't think he even realised half the things he was saying. He was talking a mile a minute. I'm not even sure _I_ caught everything. But that's not how I found out about her."

"How, then?"

Tony slipped his hands into his pockets and watched the seven-year-old's body shake as she cried into her brother's chest. "Five years ago, I meant to offer some consolation about a failed mission you and the others undertook. I stood in the doorway for ten minutes and watched you pull out that old as hell photo and stare at it for a moment, then put it back in the locket and snap the disc down the middle. I watched you cry over the family you lost. I didn't say anything. I thought you would. After we all came back, Clint had the necklace. He must've caught it when you fell. I left a little surprise gift for your daughter. I'm trusting Morgan to get it to her."

Natasha gave Tony a grateful smile before turning back to the scene before them. "Her birth certificate says her name is Anastasia Nikitichna Volkova, but we all called her Anya Barnes. Shuri and Peter both call her their little wolf. I wish I could've said goodnight to her one last time."

"Why'd you never mention her?"

"When I mentioned her, I wanted to be able to introduce her. It never occurred to me that I might not live to see our victory. Not talking about her is the only thing I regretted when I jumped."

"Moving on," Tony said a moment later, waving his hand. Natasha recognised the front porch where they had begged Tony to help them.

Two figures stood, talking.

"His name is Harley," Tony said, "I met him in 2013. He's a good kid."

"Tony, why --"

"Shh. Just watch."

Two little girls walked through the door, tightly holding each other's hand. Anya tugged at Peter's pants. "What is it, my little wolf?"

Natasha's heart clenched, and her breath hitched. Tony smiled sadly.

"Mamma is with Mr Stark?"

Peter nodded as he kneeled in front of the girls. "Yes. They saved the whole universe."

"Both of them," Harley added, crouching beside Peter.

"This is Harley," Peter told Anya, "he's a friend."

Anya tugged on Morgan's arm. "This is Morgan. She's Mr Stark's daughter."

"I know, my little wolf. Morgan, my name's Peter."

"My dad liked you a lot," Morgan said.

"Yeah. I liked your dad a lot too. Even Harley, here."

"You can be Morgan's big brother," Anya told Harley, "like Peter's my big brother."

"Or," Peter said with a small smile, picking Anya up. Harley got the hint and lifted Morgan off the wooden floor. "We can both be both of your brothers."

"Dad would like that," Morgan said.

"Mamma will be happy," Anya added.

"My clever little angel," Natasha whispered.

Tony took Natasha's hand. "Time to go."

"Can't I stay? Watch her grow up? Don't you want to see Morgan grow up?"

"I do, but it's time. Go to sleep," Tony said, guiding Natasha to a bed that didn't vanish with the scene.

"And what happens when I wake up?" Natasha asked, letting Tony force her down.

"You don't. This is the end. It's time to rest. You've done brilliantly. All that red in your ledger you were once worried about? It's clean. You helped me save the universe."

Natasha exhaled slowly, sinking into the pillow she found her head resting on.

"You can sleep easy," Tony said, pushing her vibrant curls back, "you did good."

Tony watched as Natasha closed her eyes and disappeared, like the scene of their funeral, of Harley and Peter promising to take care of his and Natasha's daughters.

"We did good," he said to no one in particular, before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath.

They did brilliantly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow. 
> 
> Growing up in the MCU was a wild ride for me. Somewhere between the first and the last "I am Iron Man" that I saw, I grew up. This story has been a wild enough ride that I truly believe it's part of the MCU. 
> 
> All I can say is that I hope you've enjoyed this as much as I have, cried where I did, and laughed where I laughed. 
> 
> As always, I always want to hear from you. Let me know what you think and what the story did to you. 
> 
> Look out for a marvel fic starting during Avengers(2012) that may take anywhere between months and a year to arrive
> 
> .............on an entirely unrelated note (lol not)  
> how many of you would be keen on a sequel to this blasting off from the epilogue?
> 
> Sequel: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19820962/chapters/46931500


End file.
